We are in a pretty well-known chocolate store in a mall just browsing around while waiting for something to be made.

A lady, around fifty, walks in and the worker behind the counter offers her hand sanitizer due to the current health situation. I notice this lady is also not wearing a mask. She then starts to complain and go off at the worker stating.

Customer: “Ah, all you people with your hand sanitizer. Don’t you know how bad this is for your skin?”

I just turn around and do the dismissive hand gesture and continue browsing.

Customer: “Well, screw you, too.”

I don’t acknowledge this and continue browsing, at which point she shouts a little louder.

Customer: “Screw you, too!”

She stormed out the shop. I am sooo sorry that a little hand sanitizer is going to be bad for your skin.

It’s at the peak of toilet-paper-based panic-buying. I am working at the counter of a chocolate shop and making small talk with a couple of customers as I check them out.

Customer #1: “It’s all so crazy, isn’t it?”

Me: “Oh, I know. I’ve even been worried that when people use the bathroom they’ll steal all of our toilet rolls!”

Customer #1: “That would be terrible!”

Customer #2: “Ooh! You all should make toilet-roll-shaped chocolates!”

Customer #1: “That’s a great idea!”

Customer #2: “Made of white chocolate!”

Customer #1: “Even better, white chocolate with splatters of milk chocolate on the outside!”

Me: *Awkward pause* “Yeah. Well, here you are. Thanks for coming in!”

Customer #2: *Walking out the door* “Seriously, do it! You’ll do great business!”

I actually lost that job soon after because of the outbreak but I don’t think poo-themed chocolates would have saved it.

Customer: “How much is a box?”
Me: “A box of candy, or a box by itself?”
Customer: “…huh?”
Me: “The box is a set price, and the candy is priced by weight. A box of candy costs more than an empty box.”
Customer: “…um…”
Me: “Do you want JUST the box, or the box AND candy?”
Customer: “I want the box.”
Me: “Okay, that’s [price].”

He pays and wanders away from the register. We have a crowd at that point so I don’t have time to really think about him until a few minutes later when I see him filling the box with candy.

Me: “You have to pay for that!”

He did pay, but was just as confused about it as he was about buying the box.

(This is a repeated interaction during wintertime; probably 4 out of 5 customers)

*Customer walls in*

Me: “Hello! How’re you doing today?”

Customer: “Cold.”

Me: *thinking* Being physically cold isn’t really an emotion, but okay…

(I work for a local nougat maker, which has a small store attached to the workshop where the nougat is made and packaged. I mainly help with the production side of things, serving customers as needed and on Saturdays when I man the store by myself all day. I’ve had my share of unobservant customers both with this job and previous ones, but this lady takes the cake. It’s closing time; I’ve already turned out the lights and the light-up “Open” sign in the window, I’ve put away the cash box, I’m straightening one last thing in the office and am literally 30 seconds away from locking up when I hear the door chime.)
Customer: “Hello? Anybody here?”
Me: *internally groaning* “Yes…”
Customer: “How come it’s so dark in here?”
Me: *coming out of the office* “Well, it’s closing time, so I’m closing up.”
Customer: “Already? At 6:00?”
Me: “Actually, we close at 6:30, and it’s 6:30 now.”
Customer: “Oh. I just saw the big “Store Open” sign out front and figured you were still open.”
(Note: Said sign is made of metal and very heavy, and I typically bring that in last, as it blocks the inner door.)
Me: “I was just about to bring that in, actually.”
Customer: “Oh.”
(At this point, I’ve turned the lights back on, just so we can see each other/not bump into anything, but she figures this means she can go ahead and pick out some nougat. I’m exhausted after a 9.5-hour shift, but I figure if we can make a little more money today, what the heck. And then comes the kicker: her credit card won’t go through, and since she has neither checkbook nor enough cash on her, she has to leave without buying anything. I QUICKLY finish closing up and head home. Next time I’m bringing the big sign in first; clearly, the lack of lights is not indication enough that we’re closed.)