You Don’t Work In The Same Field

, , , , , | Working | July 17, 2018

(I ride the bus in to my work each day, as do a few of my coworkers. We meet up occasionally and sit together. I am sitting next to a newer coworker. We are both female.)

Coworker: *lets out a loud whistle*

Me: *surprised* “What? What’s happening?”

Coworker: *in a loud whisper* “Check out dat a**!”

(She points at a man standing a little ways down the bus, who shifts, glancing at us and looking uncomfortable. I guess I look a little shocked or disgusted.)

Coworker: “What? I’m just leveling the playing field.”

(The man got off at the next stop quickly. I felt bad, and I ended up not sitting next to that coworker in the future.)

Euro-centric

, , , , | Right | July 13, 2018

(I notice a guy apparently harassing a customer and asking for money, so I try to intercede.)

Guy: “Just give me one euro!”

Me: “Excuse me, sir, but you can’t ask for money here.”

Guy: “It’s just one euro; as soon as I get it I’ll go away.” *to the customer* “Give me one euro!”

Me: “Listen, you really can’t do this. He doesn’t even speak your language.”

Guy: “Just one euro! Give me one euro!”

Me: “Okay, that’s enough. I don’t really care if you ask for the euro outside, but you can’t be doing this here.”

Guy: *looks at me, walks away until he’s at the door but just outside of the store, puts his hands over his mouth like a megaphone, and starts yelling at the customer* “GIVE ME ONE EURO!”


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Out Of Line On The Line

, , , , , | Right | July 12, 2018

(I work at a call center with a major cell phone carrier.)

Me: “Good afternoon. My name is [My Name]; how can I help you today?”

Caller: “Do you like sex?”

Me: *pregnant pause*

Caller: “Hello? Hello are you there? I ask you a question. Do you like sex?”

(I flag down a manager, as we’re not allowed to hang up until we notify a supervisor our “customer” is being abusive. Meanwhile, my mouth is going on to fill the space because every call is recorded, and they watch the audio readouts for gaps of silence.)

Me: “Sir, I will only ask you once not to talk to me that way.”

Low-Level Supervisor: *overhearing, looks at me in shock, and frantically runs to get an actual manager*

Caller: “I only ask you a simple question. Hello? Hello? Did you hear me? I just want to know if you like the sex.” *continues in the same vein, much more explicitly, with an eerily innocent tone*

Manager: “[My Name], is he being nasty?”

Me: *while muting myself on the phone* “Yes. Yes, he is. May I please hang up?”

Manager: “Yes! Yes! I thought you did already!”

Me: “Thank you! No one said I could yet.”

Caller: “Hello, are you still there? Do you want to sex with—”

Me: *hangs up*


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Making A Boob Of The HR Process

, , , , , | Working | July 10, 2018

(I am at work in a lift waiting to go up. The doors open on a floor, and two women and one man enter. The man is a member of senior management, and although I don’t work directly for him, he commands a lot of respect due to his authority. After one of the women leaves, he glances at me.)

Manager: “You look perkier than you did the other day.”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Manager: “You looked miserable the last time I saw you.”

Me: “Oh, I was probably having a down day.”

(The other woman smiles knowingly at me.)

Manager: “Did you get a new bra?”

Me: “What?”

Manager: “It’s your boobs. They look a lot firmer. Did you get a new bra?”

Me: “I don’t think that’s any of your business!”

Manager: “Don’t worry. I’m gay. If I were straight, though, I’d motorboat you.”

(The woman and I looked aghast, and the woman quickly pushed the button for the next floor. We jumped out and headed straight to HR. The HR manager — who is a woman — laughed at us, asking if we knew he was gay, and refused to file a complaint because it was impossible for him to be inappropriate with women because of his sexuality. We instead told our respective managers, and the issue was quickly escalated to the board of directors. It then came out that a lot of women had had similar experiences with him, and that the HR manager had been protecting him because he was her brother-in-law. The man simply lost his job, while the HR manager was offered a lower position, on the grounds that she also receive training on the matter of harassment in the workplace. She refused and is now not working with us, either.)

Making A Wrong Number Even More Wrong

, , , , | Romantic | July 9, 2018

(It’s late at night and I get a call from a number I don’t recognize. I usually answer, anyway, so I can include telemarketers in my block-call list. I’m female and the caller is male.)

Me: “Hello?”

Caller: “Hey, girl! Wassup?”

Me: “I think you have the wrong number.”

Caller: “Woah. You’re not my baby momma.”

Me: “Nope.”

Caller: *pauses* “So, what’re you doing?”

Me: “I think you need to call your girl.” *hangs up*

(I don’t know what that guy was thinking! I was suddenly going to flirt with an unknown stranger who had a girlfriend or wife?)

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