Wish You Could Block Out Certain Words

, , , , | Right | March 20, 2019

(I work as a customer service rep for a call center; I help with cell phones. A customer calls in to request a block be placed on a number that was calling her. After getting all of the prerequisite information:)

Customer: “You see, I need to put a block on a number that keeps calling me all hours of the night.”

Me: “I can understand that, ma’am. I’d be more than happy to apply that block to your line so you don’t have to deal with this anym—“

Customer: “Yeah, he told me he wanted to suck my a**. I’m just not into all of that kind of stuff.”

(I laughed so hard that I had to hand the call off to my floor supervisor. I never found out if she got that number blocked, but she DID tell every person she talked to that some creep wanted to do lewd things to her, and described those things in detail.)

You’ve Been Monroed

, , , , , , , | Friendly | March 18, 2019

(I’m at the park with my young son and my best friend. As we are sitting down having lunch, a couple of attractive girls walk past. It’s summer, so they’re in skirts. Just as they are nearly out of earshot, my friend mutters to me.)

Friend: “Where’s a gust of wind when you want one?”

Son: *quite loudly* Daddy, why does Uncle Jay want the wind to blow those ladies dresses up?

(The ladies turned to look at us and then walked away with a look of both amusement and disgust whilst my friend and I laughed and I tried to hush my son.)

Sit In The Park, Feed The Ducks, Learn Another Culture…

, , , , , | Friendly | March 4, 2019

(One day, I decide to walk home from work rather than take the bus. I start to get tired, so I call my husband to let him now I’ve stopped at the park and ask him to come and get me when he’s off work. He agrees, and I settle in at a park table, reading off my tablet.)

Man: “Hello there. Can I please join you?”

Me: “Okay, sure.”

Man: “I am [Man] and I’m from Africa, from [Country in Africa].”

Me: “Hi, I’m [My Name]; nice to meet you.”

Man: “I am Christian, like you.”

(I am not Christian, nor am wearing anything that indicates Christianity; in fact, I’m wearing a ring with a Pagan symbol on it. I assume he might think I’m Christian because I’m not in a hijab, which might be the way he could tell in his home country.)

Me: “Oh, okay.”

Man: “As I was walking, God laid it on my heart to talk to you.”

Me: “O… kay…” *braces self for proselytizing*

Man: “I have no wife, and I want you.”

Me: “W-what?”

(I’m not conventionally attractive and am very rarely hit on.)

Man: “I. WANT. YOU.”

Me: *holding up left hand and kind of shrinking away* “Oh, no. I’m married.”

Man: “I will leave in peace.” *wanders off*

(About that time, my husband pulled up. I was a little rattled by the encounter by then. I guess I’m going to pan it off as a cultural difference, but I did stop walking through that park by myself.)

Wolf Whistling 101

, , , , | Learning | March 3, 2019

While at university, I was going for a snack, and two of my mates were in line in front of me.

They saw a nice young woman taking a coffee, and starting making remarks about how nice she looked, loud enough to be sure that the lady heard them.

Fast forward a few minutes later. We were waiting for our new professor, and guess who it was? The nice young woman. They wrongly assumed she was a just another student.

She arrived, looked at us, saw them, paused, and smiled at them. It was the first time in my life I’d seen a black man blush. Of course, they looked sheepish, didn’t know where to hide, and were unusually quiet and calm during the whole semester.

Falling And Failing

, , , , , , , | Right | March 2, 2019

(I’m a young woman in my late twenties — though I do look younger — walking home one evening. I pass a woman, vaguely noting there’s a boy, maybe twelve or so, behind her heading in my direction. As I walk past, the boy suddenly falls. I start to bend towards him, to help him up.)

Boy: “Sorry, I just fell for you.”

(I can’t help laughing as he stands up, thinking he’s saying it to save face.)

Me: “Very smooth.”

Boy: “So, how about it?”

(I shake my head and start to head on, now assuming it’s a joke)

Boy: “I’ll take you to [Coffee Shop]!”

(I laugh, shake my head, and keep walking.)

Boy: “F***. Why doesn’t it ever work?”

(I’m still in two minds as to how serious I thought he was being, though I’m fairly sure it was a joke. I decided not to suggest that if he is going to go for random strangers, he might want to try someone who’s not over twice his age!)

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