This Coworker Is Not Your Cup Of Tea

, , , , , | Working | October 19, 2018

(I’m part of a special projects team. We’re assigned to work on two separate projects. The problem is, they both have their weekly meeting at the same time, one in the conference room upstairs and the other downstairs. My team is three of us, so we split two and one to cover both meetings and trade off who has to be alone. This week is my turn solo. We’re also good friends. My team lead assembled us on purpose; we all work well together.)

Coworker: “So, what was the fight with [Team Lead] about?”

Me: “What fight?”

Coworker: “Sure, I know you can’t say bad things about your boss. What happened?”

Me: “We’re fine.”

Coworker: “Then why isn’t she in here with you?”

Me: “[Team Lead] is with [Other Team Member].”

Coworker: *like he’s won a point* “Exactly!”

Me: “You know we work on [other project], too, right?”

Coworker: “Yeah. I’m not stupid.”

Me: “So, they’re in the meeting for [other project] downstairs.”

Coworker: “Exactly! They’re off together without you because you had a fight with [Team Lead].”

Me: “…”

Coworker: “See? I’m smart; I notice things. [Team Lead] picks fights with you guys every couple weeks, and by next week, she’ll be mad at [Other Team Member] and leave him all alone!”

(I debate trying to explain that you cannot divide three people evenly into two locations, and then give up.)

Me: “You’re right. Don’t tell anyone else. [Team Lead]… drinks green tea. I couldn’t be around that. Black tea is the only true tea.”

Coworker: *nods, winks, actually lays a finger alongside his nose* “I getcha.”

(I told my team at lunch break and they bought me a sympathy cookie for dealing with him.)

They Should Aspire To Do Better

, , , | Right | October 16, 2018

(I work at an electronic cigarette store. The amount of people who know nothing about their devices astonishes me. An e-cigarette tank requires a coil to heat up the juice in order to make it into vapor.)

Me: “Hey there. How can I help you?”

Customer: “I need a coil.”

Me: “Okay, for what kind of tank?”

(The customer points at a battery device, not a tank.)

Customer: “It’s for something like this.”

Me: “Well, that’s just the device that powers the tank; which one do you have for that device?”

Customer: “A tank.”

Me: “What kind of tank?”

Customer: *starting to get mad* “A tank for e-juice.”

Me: “Okay, do you remember the brand of the tank?”

Customer: “It’s an Aspire tank.”

Me: “Okay, which kind of Aspire tank?”

(We have about six different tanks from that one company.)

Customer: “Aspire.”

Me: “Which one?”

Customer: “ASPIRE!”

Me: “Okay, let me show you all the coils we carry from that company.”

Customer: *looks at them* “I don’t know what one goes into it.”

(He finally just picks one and leaves. About an hour later he comes back, screaming at me for a refund.)

Customer: “YOU SOLD ME THE WRONG ONE, AND I WASTED ALL MY JUICE, AND IT POURED ALL OVER THE PLACE!”

(He brought his device in, and it wasn’t even the Aspire brand.)

, , , , , | Right | October 10, 2018

(I work as an optician at a doctor’s office. This woman comes up to me asking about an update on her prescription. She tells me that she wants to keep her frames and just get new lenses. It’s no problem; we do that all the time. I explain to her that we will need to send her frames to our lab off site, since she did not get her old pair from us and we need to install new lenses directly. I then tell her the total. Problems ensue.)

Customer: “What do you mean, you need to install new lenses? Why is it so expensive?”

Me: “In order to update your prescription, we have to send your frame to our lab. There’s a small fee for using your old frame, but the lenses themselves are bringing up the price.” *shows her the price list*

Customer: “Yes, I understand that, but why do you have to put in new lenses?”

Me: “Um… In order to update your prescription, we have to create new lenses.”

Customer: “But I already paid for these!” *pointing at her glasses*

Me: *considering the possibility that she was updating her prescription on the same order, which would be free IF she got them from us* “When did you get them?”

Customer: “Three years ago! I paid over $800 for these, and now you’re telling me I have to pay more to get them changed?”

Me: “Well, if you got them from us and let us know that the prescription was wrong, we would have redone them for you right away, but even that is a 90-day grace period.”

Customer: “You’re not making any sense! Why would it cost me an additional $300 to just get my prescription updated?”

Me: “Well, the materials cost—”

Customer: *interrupting* “THAT’S THE THING, THOUGH! WHY WOULD THERE BE NEW MATERIALS? I HAVE THE GLASSES RIGHT HERE, JUST CHANGE THE PRESCRIPTION!”

Me: “I… That is not possible, in order to get a new prescription in these frames, the lenses would have to be changed entirely. We can’t just add or take away prescription to your old lenses.”

Customer: “Well, why not?”

Me: *at a loss* “I… Have you gotten glasses other than your previous pair before?”

Customer: “No! They are my first pair! I am not going to pay more to just add a prescription to my glasses!”

Me: “Okay, let me put it this way. When you were a baby, you wore smaller clothes, right? And as you grew older and taller, you needed to buy new clothes that were the correct size. That’s kind of like how prescriptions work. We can’t just… add strength to your lenses without making new ones.”

Customer: “But I already have the glasses!” *shakes her glasses at my face* “JUST ADD THE PRESCRIPTION!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry; I can’t do that.”

Customer: “You can’t or won’t?! You’re just trying to weasel more money out of me! You’re a crook! I want a manager!”

Me: “I don’t know how else to explain to you how this works. To get an updated prescription you need to get new lenses entirely. There’s no possible feasible way to add a prescription to lenses that are already made. Also, okay, my manager is at a different location, but I am happy to give you his card.”

(The woman continues to argue for about twenty minutes about how I am just trying to steal her money, that I should be able to just add the prescription to her old lenses, etc. Eventually, I ask her to wait a moment and I go and grab her doctor. The doctors don’t usually get involved with the glasses, but he makes an exception. The woman then proceeds to scream at him as well as me, making a huge scene.)

Customer: “NO ONE TOLD ME I’D HAVE TO KEEP PAYING FOR THESE WHEN I GOT THEM! YOU’RE ALL A BUNCH OF LIARS! JUST ADD THE PRESCRIPTION!”

Me: “I would be happy to! But you’re getting new lenses one way or the other!”

Doctor: “Ma’am, she’s really the expert here. You can ask anyone wearing glasses in this waiting room, and they will all tell you the same thing!”

Me: “I’m wearing glasses right now! Whenever there’s a change in my prescription I have to buy new ones!”

Customer: “I’M GOING TO SUE YOU FOR FALSE ADVERTISEMENT! THIS IS RIDICULOUS!”

Doctor: *sees I am close to tears* “Go ahead, ma’am. Good luck with that. But you need to leave now.”

Customer: “WHAT ABOUT MY NEW PRESCRIPTION?!?”

Doctor: “Take it somewhere else.”

Customer: “FINE! BUT WHEN I FIND SOMEONE WHO CAN CHANGE IT WITHOUT CHANGING THE WHOLE LENS I’M GOING TO COME BACK!”

(She storms out, tries to slam the door, and cusses loudly when she realizes it’s a door that cannot be slammed.)

Doctor: “I’m sorry; I knew she’d be a problem when I was testing her eyes.”

Random Customer: “Dear, go take a break.”

Other Random Customer: “No one should be around that much stupid; I almost smacked her with my cane!”

(The woman did eventually come back — a lot more quietly — after a couple of weeks, since most other optical shops did not take her insurance AND she’d gotten the same response from literally everyone. She even had the guts to complain about how some of them laughed her out of the stores. I kept my best customer service face and just put her order through with a smile. She never apologized for her prior outburst, and still complained about the price, even though I offered her a healthy discount on TOP of her insurance benefits. Some people.)

Unfiltered Story #122505

, , , | Unfiltered | October 7, 2018

(I work at a seasonal Halloween store, and today only a few customers are in the store. I am sweeping when I turn into a hallway in front of the registers; it was like a scene in a horror story. A young kid, maybe eight, has one of the little toys we set by the registers in his mouth.)

Kid: *blows on it* “It’s a whistle.”

Me: “Um…”

Kid: *puts it back on the shelf* “It’s broken.”

(A fellow cashier sanitized the whistles with Purell and nervously laughed it off. Later a mom is checking out and her little girl is picking out more trinkets to buy and almost leaves with the EXACT SAME WHISTLE. She was stopped and it was put back.)

Me: *to fellow cashier* “I was so tempted to tell her “Are you sure about that whistle? A little boy used it before you.””

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 80

, , , , | Right | October 3, 2018

(A customer walks in with a bra that she wants to return. She ordered it from our website, and found out it was the wrong size when it arrived. She wants to exchange it for a different size. Previously, we were able to do exchanges in one transaction, meaning the credit for the returned item would go toward the new item. Recently, corporate changed some of our return policies, and one of them was that returns and purchases have to be done on separate transactions for loss prevention reasons.)

Me: “Okay. Just so you know, our return policy has changed, so we’re going to have to do two separate transactions today. First, I’ll give you your money back for the bra that doesn’t fit. It’ll be credited right back to the card you bought it with. Then, in the next transaction, I’ll ring up the new bra, and you’ll just pay the same amount that you paid for the returned bra.”

Customer: “No problem. Sounds good.”

(I process the return. When I ask her to hit “yes” on the PIN-pad to confirm that the amount she’s getting back is correct, she shakes her head and picks up the new bra.)

Customer: “No, this isn’t right. Did you forget that I wanted to buy this one?”

Me: “Well, like I said, we recently had some changes made to our return policy, so we have to do exchanges on two separate transactions. We give you your money back in one transaction, and then the new purchase in another transaction. I just gave you your money back for the bra that didn’t fit. Now, I can ring up your new bra, and you’ll pay exactly what you paid for the old one. It’s still an even exchange. Corporate just decided to add a step.”

Customer: *still visibly confused* “All right, if you say so.”

(I ring up the new bra and adjust the price so it’s the same as what she paid for the bra she just returned.)

Me: “That’ll be [price].”

Customer: “I don’t understand. You told me this would be an even exchange. Why am I being charged for this bra when I just returned the exact same one?”

Me: “I just gave you back your money for the first bra. The money you paid for it was refunded right back to your card. Even though it looks like you’re paying [price] for this bra, we’re only asking you to pay the exact amount you were just refunded.”

Customer: “So, you’re saying I don’t get my money back?”

(The customer’s friend, who came in with her and was looking around the boutique while I processed the exchange, overhears and tries to intervene on her behalf.)

Friend: “She already bought this bra. She just wants to swap it out for a different size. Why are you making her pay for it twice?”

Me: *ignoring the friend* “Corporate changed the rules, and we have to do exchanges on two separate transactions. Before, we could just give you back your money and ring up your new purchases in the same step. We can’t do that anymore. We have do returns and purchases in two separate steps. It can be confusing at first.”

Customer: “Yes, it’s very confusing. I just want my money back.”

Me: *pointing to her return receipt* “I just put the amount you paid for the bra that didn’t fit back onto the card you used to pay for it. The bra you’re replacing it with is the exact same price. In the end, your credit card balance will not change. Do you still want to purchase this bra?”

Customer: “Well, I guess I have to. I need a bra. You’re sure my credit card balance will be the same?”

Me: “Yes. It can take up to 48 hours for your refund to go through. If, two days from now, you check your credit card balance and you haven’t gotten your [refund amount] back, please call the customer service number at the bottom of your receipt and we can get it sorted out. But I can’t think of any reason why it wouldn’t go through.”

(The customer, clearly not satisfied with my explanation, thanked me and walked away. Her friend was loudly complaining about how we “made her buy the same bra twice,” and “wouldn’t give her her money back.” Later that week, a different lady came in with a return, which I processed. When we were done, she said she wanted to look around. She ended up buying some things, and after I was done ringing her items, she insisted that her total shouldn’t be so much because she wanted her refund credited toward her new purchase. Do people seriously not understand how credit cards work?)

Related:
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 79
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 78
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 77

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