What Did Grandpa Do?

, , , , | Right | February 27, 2021

I work at the reception desk at a retirement center. We frequently receive calls from confused/sundowning elderly people trying to contact friends or family who live in the facility.

Me: *Answering the phone* “Good morning! This is [Facility] how may I help you?”

There is no answer, only the sound of shuffling and button pressing.

Me: *Louder* “Hello? Hello, this is [Facility]. May I help you?”

There was more button pressing, and then in the background, there was a sudden, scandalized cry of, “GRANDPA, NO!” before the call abruptly disconnected.

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They’re Outing Their Minds

, , , , | Right | February 25, 2021

I am working the front desk at an assisted living facility when two family members come up to look at the outing lists I have posted on the side of the desk.

Woman: “So… this outing today to [Mexican Restaurant]. Can she go on this?”

Me: “It looks like there’s enough space left! You’re welcome to sign her up.”

Woman: “But… then there’s this bus ride to tour [Local University Campus], too. How can she go to both?”

Man: “Yeah, that might be too much for her.”

Me: “Well, they’re both on different days.”

He points at dates in bold on the two sheets.

Man: “This one for the restaurant is for today and this one is for next week.”

Woman: “But if she goes to this one—”

She points to today’s outing.

Woman: “—at 11:30 and then the other at 1:00, she’ll have a really busy day and might get over-tired.”

The man is nodding along.

Me: “But… they’re not on the same day, so that wouldn’t be a problem. The restaurant outings usually take about two hours, sometimes two and a half or three with driving time. The bus tour takes around an hour. And our staff will always bring residents back who aren’t feeling up to it anymore.”

The woman nods while staring back and forth at both sheets.

Woman: “Okay… I’m just worried that two outings in one day might be pushing it.”

I am looking back and forth between the two.

Me: “They’re on separate days. This one is for today—” *points to it* “—and this one—” *points to it* “—is for next week. We only ever do one outing on a day.”

Woman: “I’m not sure… That’s quite a few hours out of the community in one day.”

Me: *Inner sigh* “Here.”

I pull out the calendar and point to today.

Me: “This is today. Today is the outing to [Mexican Restaurant].”

I slide my finger through the rest of the week and on to next Friday.

Me: “And here is the outing to [Bus Tour], a week from today. Each outing is a week apart, on different Fridays.”

Woman: “Hmm…”

Man: “But if she gets too tired doing two outings today, she can come back early?”

Me: *Giving up* “Yes, they will bring her back early if she gets too tired.”

Woman: “Okay, let’s sign her up for both of today’s outings, then.”

They signed the resident up for both of “today’s” outings and left. I have no idea where their brains were. Seriously, how else could I have explained it?! People have real issues paying attention.

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Making A Stand Over Candy

, , , | Right | February 15, 2021

I work in an assisted living facility. A woman comes into the front lobby and asks for our director. She’s expecting her for an interview.

Me: “I will let [Director] know you’re here.”

The woman keeps standing over my desk, staring at me.

Me: “You’re welcome to have a seat.”

Woman: “No, thank you.”

She continues to stand there, hovering.

Me: “Okay…”

I call the director to let her know her interview is here and then continue my typing work. She is still standing there.

Woman: “Is that for everybody?”

She points to candy on my desk that is partially hidden by the taller part of my desk and phone.

Me: “No… that’s my coworker’s.”

The woman gives me a suspicious look.

Woman: “Okay.”

Me: “I can’t just hand it out.”

Woman: “Fine.”

She crossed her arms and pouted. My boss came out and they went off for the interview. The candy was mine, by the way, not a random coworker’s. But who does that?! Lurking over a reception desk, not taking a seat when it’s offered, and trying to pilfer someone’s candy that’s obviously hidden on their desk…

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Introduce A Fine For Non-Sign-Outs And See What Happens

, , , | Right | February 3, 2021

I work in an assisted living facility. On my desk in the front lobby is a computer for visitors to sign in and out. A man is leaving, taking his wife, who is a resident, to an appointment.

Visitor: “You can sign us out. Our ride is here.”

Me: “I can sign [Resident] out, but I need your phone number to sign you out.”

Visitor: “Oh, I don’t need to sign out.”

He flounces off out the door.

Me: “You… you do, actually.”

I sighed and went through the process of looking through our online files to find his phone number and signed his rude a** out.

I wish I could say this was the one and only time this happened. The man is in his fifties and seems sound of mind. I understand being in a hurry, too, but ten seconds to sign out like every other person is too much, I guess.

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If Google Says So, It Must Be True, Part 2

, , , , | Right | January 20, 2021

It’s nearing the end of my shift and I’ve more than paid my dues dealing with stupid today. Then, I get this phone call.

Me: “[Business], this is [My Name]. How may I help you?”

Caller: *Silence*

Me: “Hello?”

Caller: “Um… ah, yes… is this [Totally Different Unrelated Business]?”

Me: “No… this is [Business].

Caller: “Oh… well, Google says this is the number for [Other Business]. This isn’t [Other Business]?”

Me: “No, ma’am. This is [Business].”

Caller: “But… Google has this number for [Other Business].”

Me: “I’m sorry, that’s not us. Google does mess up sometimes.”

Caller: “But Google lists [phone number] for [Other Business]!”

Me: “I don’t know how that reached us; that’s not our number.”

Caller: “Google says this should be [Other Business], though!”

We continued in that vein for a good five or ten minutes. Google is a good search engine, but it’s not omnipotent! And how hard is it to just say, “Sorry, wrong number”?

Related:
If Google Says So, It Must Be True

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