They’re Not On Good Form Lately

, , , , | Learning | September 24, 2019

(I attend a college that requires every graduate to complete, over the course of their education, four physical education courses. Going into my final semester, I check my credits only to discover that I only have credit for three courses due to completing the same basic PE course in two different semesters. The second course was treated as a re-do and overwrote the grade of the first. Thankfully, the school has forms for this sort of thing. I fill one out and submit it to the correct office and think nothing of it for six weeks, until…)

Me: “Excuse me. I filled out a form to have a PE course counted twice for my credits. This was about a month ago and I just noticed I’m still short on credits.”

Help Desk: “Hmm, I don’t see anything in the system about it. Let me check your student folder.”

(Drawers are opened and folders are shuffled.)

Help Desk: “Nope, I don’t have any form for that. Are you sure it was submitted properly?”

Me: “Yes, I did it right here at this desk.”

(Long story short, they have no history of me submitting this document which included my name, student ID number, and class information. I am not thrilled but I get a new copy, fill it out, and resubmit it. Two weeks later…)

Me: “Hi. I submitted a form to have a PE course counted twice two weeks ago and it isn’t showing up. Could you check your system?”

Help Desk: “I’m not seeing anything in the system. Let me check your student folder. You’re sure it was submitted here, right?”

Me: “Yes, and this is the second time I’ve done this at this desk.”

(Again, no form is found. So, I get another form, fill it out, photocopy it, and submit the original. One week later…)

Me: “Okay, I submitted a form last week for getting a PE course counted twice but it’s not on my account. What is going on with it?”

Help Desk: “I’ve got nothing in the system. Let me check your folder… Yeah, nothing here. Did you–”

(I plop down a photocopy of the form.)

Me: “This is the third time I’ve come here asking when this form is getting counted. What the heck is going on that you’ve lost my paperwork three times?!”

(It finally stuck. If it hadn’t, I would have had to come back for one more semester for a single PE credit!)

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Will Need To Take Stress Leave For Trying To Get Bereavement Leave

, , , , , | Working | September 23, 2019

(My grandmother dies the same day I return from a disability leave. She lived overseas so I won’t be able to go to the funeral, but I contact my manager about bereavement time as I am still working partial hours.)

Me: “My grandmother overseas passed away yesterday evening. I’m not able to attend the funeral, but I would like to take bereavement time. How would that work?”

Boss: *after checking with HR* “You will have to ask your caseworker for approval. Please let me know what they say.”

(I leave a voicemail for my caseworker the same day. She calls back almost three weeks later, telling me that they are not involved and that I should speak with my employer. I tell my boss the next day:)

Me: “The caseworker just called me back yesterday and said that they aren’t involved with bereavement. They just take the hours I work and coordinate with my benefits.”

Boss: *again, after asking HR* “Is your intent to take the full bereavement time?”

Me: “Yes.”

Boss: “Track it with the hours you work, then, and take the time soon; it’s been almost a month!”

(I would have taken it when I asked if I wasn’t given the wrong answer!)

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Pink And You’ll Miss It

, , , | Right | September 21, 2019

(A customer approaches my counter just as I finish ringing another client.)

Me: “Hello, can I help you find anything today?”

Customer: “Pink.”

Me: “Okay, definitely. Were you looking for pink eyeshadow, pink lipstick, pink blush…?”

Customer: “PINK!”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, which product was it that you were looking for?”

Customer: “PINK! I said PINK!”

Me: “Okay…” *shows her a few pink lipsticks*

Customer: “No.”

Me: *shows her a few pink blushes*

Customer: “That isn’t right.”

Me: “Can you tell me anything else about the product you were looking for?”

Customer: *points at a blue eyeshadow* “Like this. I want this. Give me this.”

Me: “A pink one of this?”

Customer: “NO, this one!”

Me: *wonders why I still work here*

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It’s Like Watching An Unstoppable Force Meet An Immovable Object  

, , , | Right | September 20, 2019

(I work at the front desk of a major advertising agency. One morning, a gentleman comes in, looking around, confused, and approaches my desk.)

Me: “Hi there! How can I help you?”

Client: “Um… I have an appointment with two clients of mine today.”

Me: “Okay, do you have their names so I can let them know you’re here?”

Client: “I don’t know their names.”

Me: “Oh. Hmm. What department could they be in?”

Client: “Oh, you know, sales. Their names are on my phone.”

(He then looks at me expectantly.)

Me: “I see. Well, once you know their names, I will be glad to have them come get you.”

Client: “The name is on my phone.”

Me: “Feel free to check your phone on the seats over there, if you like.”

Client: “Don’t you have an appointment for me? My name is [My Name].”

Me: “Unfortunately, as we have over 300 people in the building and many of them work sales or design and have constant appointments, I have no way of keeping track of everyone’s schedules. If you’ll just look up who you are meeting, though, I will be glad to let them know you’re here.”

Client: “Fine.”

(He pulls his phone out of his pocket and scrolls through a bit.)

Client: “It’s with [Person #1] and [Person #2].”

Me: “Great! I will let them know you’re here, then.”

Client: “That shouldn’t have been so hard.”

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Keep Driving East And Eventually, It Will!

, , , , , | Working | September 17, 2019

(I travel pretty much everywhere in my city by bus and it is usually easy to tell who the tourists are as they often ask the divers for specific stops. The drivers don’t always appreciate having to be a tour guide for these folks.)

Tourist: “Where is the stop for Chinatown?”

Driver: “You get off when it looks like China.”

Tourist: “Yes, but what is the specific stop?”

Driver: “You get off when it looks like China!”

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