On The Need For Hazard Pay, Part 13

, , , , , , | Right | October 13, 2017

(It’s a quiet Sunday morning, and I’m the only cashier. An older man who looks at least 70 hobbles up to my register and places a shirt on the counter.)

Customer: “I’d like to get this shirt, and I was told you could also take the sensor tag off these pants I’m wearing so I can buy them.”

Me: “Uh, the pants you have on right now? They’re from here?”

Customer: “Yes. Trying them on tuckered me out, and the girl in the fitting room said you could remove the sensor tag up here at the register.”

(Our sensor-removers are secured to the counter, and I know for a fact that there’s no way this man could manage holding his leg up to get the sensor tag taken off. I stammer for a moment before remembering an unattached sensor tag remover we used for our express lane on Black Friday months ago.)

Me: “Right! Let me just see if someone can get us the sensor-remover we need.”

(I ask over the radio and receive some confusion over why I would need it, but eventually my manager says she’ll go to the lock box in the back and get it.)

Me: “All right, [Manager] is just grabbing that sensor-remover, and then you’ll be good to go!”

Customer: “But I was told that you could remove the sensor tag.”

Me: “Yeah, we can; it’s just that our normal removers are attached to the counter. [Manager] is grabbing the unattached one right now.”

Customer: “Well, I’ve already stood here longer than I can handle. If I have to go take the pants off, I just won’t buy them.”

Me: “No, it’s all right. The sensor-remover is on its way up right now; don’t worry.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous. I was told the sensor could be removed. I won’t buy the pants if I have to go take them off.”

(I’m taken aback by how angry the customer is getting, but thankfully my confused manager arrives at that moment with the unattached remover. I go around the counter and have to crouch down to try and remove the sensor at the bottom of the customer’s pants leg. It’s a tricky process, and I notice the man is balancing on one foot, so I tell him he can put his foot down if it would make him more comfortable.)

Customer: “Actually, I have an open sore on that foot.”

Me: *freezes* “Uh, where is that exactly, so I don’t bump it?”

Customer: “Oh, it’s just on the bottom of my foot.”

(With that gross image in mind, I was finally able to get the sensor removed from the pants. I then had to pull all the tags and stickers off of the pants, getting much closer and more touchy-feely with the customer than I would have ever wanted to. He left without so much as a “thank you,” and I promptly took a much needed break to shake off the heebie-jeebies the whole interaction gave me.)

Return Of The Couponater

, , , , , , | Right | October 13, 2017

(We’re having our big spring sale and the store is very busy. A man comes up to my register and I ring up over $200 worth of merchandise for him. He shows me his phone with a popular third-party coupon collection app pulled up and a one-word coupon code listed. We currently only have one in-store coupon out, and that’s definitely not it.)

Me: “I’m sorry; that looks like an online-only coupon. I can try it, but I don’t think it’ll work.”

(I type in the code and, as expected, a message pops up stating that the discount cannot be used in-store.)

Customer: “You mean to tell me that your company puts out coupons that can only be used online and not in the store?”

Me: “Actually, a lot of companies do that. The online store often has different sales than we do.”

Customer: “So, you’re saying that I could buy all of this crap online for a cheaper price, because that’s the only way this coupon will work?”

Me: “Well, not exactly. We’re having a big sale right now in the store. I can almost guarantee that everything online is full price, plus you’d have to pay for shipping. That’s why they put out those codes, in order to get you to order the full-priced items online. I think you’re getting a better deal in the store, even without the coupon.”

Customer: “Are you kidding me? This is no way to run a business!”

Me: “I’m really sorry. I can offer you the in-store coupon we do have right now for $15 off your purchase, but that’s all I can do.”

Customer: “Fine. Add that on, and I’ll look up another coupon.”

(I try to explain that coupons don’t usually combine like that, but the customer ignores me. He then proceeds to spend the next ten minutes staring at his phone, looking through coupons on the third-party app. He finally finds one to his liking, and shows his phone to me again.)

Me: “That coupon gave me the same message: ‘Cannot be used in stores’.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous! Fine, I’ll just pay for this now. But let me tell you: this is no way to run a business. I don’t know how you guys survive by being this dishonest.”

(The customer ended up coming back a few hours later, having signed up for the email list, which sends a percentage-off coupon. I then had to return his entire purchase, and re-buy it with the new code. Luckily, this one worked!)

Not Sure You Know How “Interrupting” Works

, , , , | Right | October 6, 2017

(I work at a high-priced clothing store, part time. A customer walks into the store, talking on her phone to her friend until the end of her visit.)

Customer: “Ma’am, where are the purses?”

Me: “Oh, we don’t have a certain place for them; they’re just on tables and shelves.”

Customer: “Okay.”

Me: “Is there a certain purse you were looking for?”

Customer: *rolls her eyes and says to her friend on the phone* “Girl, I am going to have to call you back. This little girl is interrupting me.”

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 69

, , , , , | Right | September 26, 2017

Me: “Your total is $31.39. You can insert your card when you’re ready.”

(The customer inserts her card, and it’s declined.)

Me: “Sorry, your card was declined. Do you want to try another card?”

(The customer tries the same card and it’s once again declined.)

Customer: “So, am I good?”

Me: “No, sorry. It was declined again.”

Customer: “…”

Me: “…”

Customer: “I don’t get it.”

Me: “Your card was declined. You’ll have to call your bank if you think it’s a mistake. It may have a protection on it.”

(The customer hands me the card.)

Me: “I can’t do anything on my end. You’ll have to call your bank.”

Customer: “But it’s all the way in [Next Town Over].”

Me: “You can just call them, and I’ll hold your things.”

Customer: *pulls out cash, but not enough to cover all of it* “What about if I just buy one? How much is one?”

Me: “You can do that; just let me know which one to take off. If you buy one, it’ll be $15 plus tax.”

Customer: “…”

Me: “Which color would you like?”

Customer: “So, now what? What do I do?”

Me: “You need to choose a color.”

Customer: “…”

Me: “Blue or black?”

Customer: “…”

Me: “I need to void one of these items in order to finish the transaction.”

(The customer stays quiet for a few moments, as she processes this life or death decision.)

Customer: “I want the black one.”

Me: *quickly takes payment and waits for the customer to leave before turning to my coworker, who witnessed it all* “Are my ears bleeding?”

Unfiltered Story #96349

, , , | Unfiltered | September 26, 2017

(I work at a clothing store that has the ability to order merchandise online as well, so we deal with a lot of online returns. A woman comes up returning just one item from her online order, and the interaction goes pretty smoothly until the end.)

Me: Okay, we’ll just send [total] back to your credit card then!

Customer: Wait, that’s not right, shouldn’t it be [total about four dollars higher]?

(I take a look at her invoice and spot the problem fairly quickly.)

Me: Oh, the amount you’re thinking of is including the $3.99 shipping. You paid [total] for this shirt, and that’s what we’re refunding you.

Customer: But shouldn’t I get shipping refunded as well?

Me: No, we don’t do shipping refunds here. The online customer service sometimes does when there’s a shipping problem, but not for just a return like this.

Customer: But I’m returning the item. So, I should get back everything that I paid.

Me: Well, [Company] doesn’t get the money you paid for shipping… that’s what they use to pay the company that delivers your package, I’m assuming.

Customer: Yes, but I’m returning the item! Stop trying to cheat me out of my money!

Me: Ma’am, this item was shipped and delivered to you without a problem. That’s where the shipping cost went. There’s honestly nothing I can do to refund that $3.99 to you, I can only refund the cost of the shirt you’re returning. If you have a problem with that, you can contact online customer service at the phone number listed on your invoice.

(The customer finally grudgingly accepted that she wasn’t getting her shipping costs back and left in a huff, vowing never to order from our online store again.)

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