A Cents-able Waste Of Time

, , , | Right | October 19, 2017

(I walk up to the line at the post office to purchase a stamp for my letter and stand behind a mother who is frantically trying to keep her rambunctious toddler in check. I can tell she has been waiting here for quite some time, as the elderly lady in front of her is asking a hundred questions about the package she wants to deliver. The mother has to leave the line a couple times to get her toddler to come back into line. She apologizes numerous times and I tell her not to worry about it. The first lady finally finishes and the mother takes her turn. She ends up having to change the size of her box, run out of line to fetch her child, and has trouble finding the cash to pay. She continues to apologize with each incident that arises. I smile and tell her there is no rush and to take her time. She finally finishes, thanks me for my patience, and pulls over to the side to corral her toddler and put her wallet into her purse. I walk up to the clerk.)

Me: “Hello, I’d like to mail this letter. I know the mailing price increased over the new year and I have an old stamp on this letter. I would like a one-cent stamp to make up for the increase, please.”

(The clerk and lady just looked at me and laughed, as it took me about a half-hour to get a one-cent stamp.)

Your Days Working Here Are “Numbered”

, , , | Working | October 16, 2017

(I need to send a package to a friend who has just started university. The post office has to input the address details to generate a postage label. The address is in the format: Flat 123a, Building, 456 Anywhere Street, City, Postcode.)

Postal Clerk: “This address doesn’t work.”

Me: “Uh, sorry?”

Postal Clerk: “It has too many numbers.”

Me: “That’s the address, though.”

Postal Clerk: “But you can’t have a flat number AND a street number.”

Me: “I don’t know what to tell you. That’s the address.”

Postal Clerk: “I’ll need to get the manager.”

(She explains the problem to the manager, rolling her eyes at me the whole time.)

Manager: “You do this.” *taps a few keys* “See?”

Postal Clerk: “But… there’s too many numbers!”

Manager: *to me* “That’s £2.85; thank you very much.”

(The clerk stood there glaring between me and the manager as I paid and got my proof of posting, and as I left I heard her say, “But there were TOO MANY NUMBERS!” I think that manager was in for a long day.)

Not Thinking Inside The Mailbox

, , , , , | Working | September 27, 2017

(I am standing in line at my local post office when I overhear this:)

Man: “There’s been a problem; I’ve put my mail on hold, but it’s still being delivered.”

Worker: *interrupting him* “Yes, your mail was delivered to your mailbox.”

Man: “My mail was put on hold because I don’t have a mailbox right now.”

Worker: “Well, you should have been issued a temporary city-given one.”

(In our city, if a mailbox is damaged, it will be replaced by the city.)

Man: “No, I don’t have a mailbox, temporary or not. And now I’m looking for a week’s’ worth of mail.”

Worker: “The mail was delivered to your mailbox!”

Man: “The mail that should have been on hold was delivered to the mailbox I don’t have.”

Worker: “I’m sure the delivery person was just trying to be nice!”

Man: “By delivering my held mail to a mailbox that’s not mine?”

(Throughout this entire conversation, the post office worker continued to walk in circles about the mail, which should have been held, being delivered to either a mailbox that didn’t exist or to the wrong one. No apologies were given, either, and no ETA was given on the missing mail.)

Needs A Stamp Of Reality

, , , | Right | September 26, 2017

(I’m waiting in line behind an older customer who seems disturbed about something. The nicest clerk calls her up. The customer is complaining that the only books of stamps they have are Christmas themed.)

Customer: “I went to the other post office, and all they had was Christmas stamps. I thought your office would be more updated.”

Clerk: “Sorry, but I don’t have any control over what stamps we carry.”

(She grumbles off and the clerk calls me up.)

Me: “I’ll take Christmas stamps…”

Clerk: “Yeah, my son was in the Peace Corps in Kazakhstan for three years. To reach the post office, it took three buses. And when they had to wait for a bus, they had to stand back-to-back to watch out for the wolves.”

Me: “Holy cats.”

Clerk: “Yeah, so, when people like that come in… I just don’t get it.”

Gay-itis

, , , , | Right | September 4, 2017

(I’ve just sold a pack of novelty stamps to an elderly woman.)

Woman: “Is it safe to lick these?”

Me: “You don’t need to; they’re adhesive on the back. You just need to peel it off and stick it straight on.”

Woman: “That’s good. I didn’t want to catch the gay.”

Me: “Gay?”

Woman: “From the rainbow. Everyone knows if you lick something that has a rainbow on it, you catch the gay. That’s why I stay inside when those gay floats come down my street. You don’t want anything accidentally landing in your mouth.” *leaves*

Coworker: “I wonder if she’s ever had a bag of Skittles.”

Me: “I doubt it. You definitely catch the gay from them!”

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