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A Tornado Of Entitlement

, , , , , , | Right | February 1, 2023

A tornado has recently destroyed a large part of my city. When the tornado warning goes off, servers and the back-of-house staff gather up everyone. The staff goes into the walk-in coolers, and the patrons go into the bathrooms.

Chaos erupts outside, but thankfully, the building stands strong. The warning is eventually over and we all come out. An inventory of people is made: everyone is safe and accounted for. No one is hurt.

Outside, part of the parking lot is a mess. Vehicles are no longer neatly parked but have been tossed around like an upended box of Matchbox cars. Across the street… there’s destruction. The tornado plowed through the town literally across the street. We, obviously, have no power.

Then, a lady pipes up.

Customer: “So, why haven’t we gotten our food yet?”


Me: “Ma’am, you were in the bathroom. The staff were in the fridge. Were you not aware that the reason for this was a tornado?”

Customer: “Well, we ordered over thirty minutes ago!”

Me: “Yes. And everyone was preparing for the storm. No one was going to continue making food and risking their lives.”

Customer: “Yes, and now it’s over. I expect my meal to be comped.”

Manager: “Well, since we have no power, you’re not going to GET your order. No one is. As of right now, we’re closed. I suggest you go see if your home is even still there.”

Customer: “You are being very rude!”

Manager: “And you’re being an idiot. Now get out of my restaurant.”

Male Voice: *From the crowd* “[Customer], let’s go see if we even have a car to take us home.”

Customer: *Storming out* “My car had better be there, or I’ll sue the s*** out of [Restaurant]!”

Male Voice: “Shut up, [Customer] just… shut the h*** up.”

The crowd slowly began to sort themselves out. I think most were in shock from seeing the mess outside, but at least everyone else had their heads screwed on straight. Even though the manager promised that meals were comped today, most people paid with cash and left impressive tips.

We got a phone call later with an angry woman’s voice screeching about how rude the staff was. The manager was the same, so she didn’t get very far.

Sometime later, higher-ups got in contact with us, not to hand down punishments, but to basically point and laugh at a series of complaints. There were several complaints about the restaurant not answering phones DURING THE TORNADO and demanding that the staff be reprimanded for job abandonment. The highlight of the list was a complaint about the restaurant refusing to serve food after the power went out and the rudeness of the manager.

It just goes to show you: nothing will stop an entitled customer from throwing a tantrum, not even a tornado.

Object Permanence Is Hard, Part 2

, , , , , , | Related | January 25, 2023

My niece is two and occasionally likes to hang out with just me. One night, we are hiding from her mom in her closet. 

Niece: “Can you shut the door?”

Me: “I’m sorry, baby, but I can’t. You’ll have to do it.”

Niece: “Why not?”

Me: “I’m not really there. I’m just on the phone with you.”

Niece: “Oh, yeah.”

Object Permanence Is Hard

When Ignoring The Trolls Actually Works

, , , , , , , , , | Right | January 16, 2023

I am Hispanic, but I know about as much Spanish as your average Johnny Q. Public: “Como se llama,” “Uno, dos, tres…”, and that’s about it.

Yet when I started working in customer service as a cashier, I would routinely come across these types of comments:

Customer #1: *After misunderstanding something I said* “Oh! Sorry, it’s your accent. I’m not Mexican, after all.”

Customer #2: *Again, after not clearly understanding something I said* “You can speak English with me, not Spanish.”

Customer #3: *After discovering an error with his order* “If you can’t understand fluent English, then you just need to work in the kitchen or ask your boss to give you an interpreter to help you!”

And then, there was this woman. She was in a separate line, waiting for another cashier. He went on break as she was approaching and directed her over to me. She walked up to my register while wearing a twisted, sour expression on her face like I was openly picking my nose.

Customer #4: *Very slowly* “Can you understand me?”

Me: “I most certainly can! How can I help you today?”

Customer #4:What?”

I repeat myself more slowly.

Customer #4: “You’re not as fluent as you think you are, so just stop. And that’s ‘May I take your order, please?’ not ‘How can I help you today?’ You say that when you’re working in a retail store.”

She then proceeded to very slowly give me her order. When she was finished:

Me: “For here or takeaway?”

Customer #4: “…”

Me: “For here or takeaway?”

Customer #4: “…”

Me: “Madam? For here or takeaway?”

Customer #4: *Screaming*For here! And it’s called ‘to go’, not ‘takeaway’.”

Me: “Your total will be $8.50.”

Customer #4: “Can you break a $100 bill?”

Me: “No, I just started and don’t have enough—”

Customer #4: *Loudly huffing* “Can I have someone who speaks English, please?! I don’t have all day!”

That was when the customer behind her stepped forward next to her.

Customer Behind Her: “Hi, I’ll have [series of food items].”


Customer Behind Her: “I’m on my lunch break. You want to play your games, do it on your own time.” *Continues his order*

She loudly protested, only for the customer to continue talking to me like she was invisible. I smirked, canceled the first order, and gladly took the new order, also while pretending she was invisible. She ultimately gave up and stomped out of the restaurant.

An Organic Answer

, , , , , , , , | Working | December 22, 2022

I’m in line at the grocery store checkout. The customer in front of me is carefully watching as each of his items is scanned. Then, suddenly, he erupts.

Customer: “That bag of frozen vegetables is too much! Why is it that expensive?”

The young cashier looks at the bag of frozen vegetables.

Cashier: “They’re ‘organically grown’; those are usually higher priced.”

Customer: “’Organically grown’? What does that even mean?”

The cashier thinks for a few seconds and then responds in an authoritative voice.

Cashier: “It means the person who grew them had organs.”

I assume the cashier was either joking or just wanted to be done with the situation.

Love Always Finds A Way

, , , , , , | Romantic | December 20, 2022

Before my parents met, my dad was in the army, and my mom was a civilian working at the same army base. Both were far from home. In my mom’s case, it was her first time living in an area with no family nearby.

My mom got involved in some of the women’s groups and other groups to get to know the community. One older woman in particular took my mom under her wing and repeatedly told her she wanted to introduce her to a lieutenant who worked under her husband. My mom was very open to meeting people, but the woman never really followed through.

Fast forward a bit. My parents met at a party on base, started dating, and got engaged a few months later. They had an engagement party.

At the engagement party, the woman who had wanted to set my mom up with that nice young lieutenant was there, and she came up to my mom.

Older Woman: “Congratulations on your engagement! I’m very happy for you. I’m just sorry I never got a chance to introduce you to that nice lieutenant; I really think you would have gotten along well. He’s here, though! I still want to introduce you.”

She flagged down the nice lieutenant.

Older Woman: “Here he is! [Lieutenant], I wanted to introduce you to [Mom].”

Mom: “Well, you were right that we’d get along well; this is my fiancé!”

The older woman was definitely right that they’d get along well! My parents have been married for forty-eight years.