Your Annoyance Level Is Up To The High Teens

, , , , , , , | Right | September 10, 2017

(I work the overnight shift alone from 10 pm to 6 am. I usually get the local cops in at the beginning of my shift, since they are starting their shift as well, and they also come by a few times a night, just to check in and say hi. Around 3 am one Sunday morning, another regular, who is shy and has a social disability, comes in to get his coffee and wait for his ride. As I’m finishing with him. two teenage boys come in.)

Me: *to regular* “Thanks for shopping at [Gas Station] and I’ll see you tomorrow.” *to teenagers* “Can I help you two with anything?”

Teenager #1: “Yeah, I’d like some cigarettes. [Brand].”

Me: “Certainly. I’ll just need to see some ID.”

Teenager #1: “I left it at the house. Can you let it slide this once? Besides, I only live right down the street.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t sell to anyone that looks under 30 without an ID. Besides, if you live right down the street, then it should be no problem to get your ID.”

Teenager #1: “C’mon, man, just let it slide this once. I can tell you my birthday. It’s [date].”

Me: “Well, sir, if that is your birthday, then you are only 16. I can’t sell the cigarettes to you, but feel free to get anything else.”

Teenager #2: “Here, I’ll get them then. I just turned 18 and I have my ID.”

Me: “Sorry, sir, but I can’t sell them to you, since I know you are buying them for your friend, who I know is underage.”

Teenager #2: “But I’m 18!”

Teenager #1: “Don’t be a d***. Nobody will notice at this time of night.”

Me: “Sorry, but it’s not worth my job.”

(The two teenagers leave, and I see them go up to my regular, who is still waiting in the parking lot, and talk to him for a minute. My regular walks back in.)

Regular: “Can I get a pack of [Cigarette Brand Teenager Asked For]?”

Me: “I actually can’t. I know you don’t smoke, and I know those boys just asked you to get them cigarettes. Tell them I’m not selling them cigarettes, and they can’t get anyone else to buy them for them.”

(My regular leaves and talks to the teens. He gets picked up around five minutes later, but the teens are still loitering. I ignore them, as there isn’t anyone else in the store or parking lot, and start to mop while the store is slow. About 20 minutes later, the teens come in and get some nachos, making a mess in the process. As they come to check out, I notice the reek of alcohol.)

Teenager #2: “I’d like these nachos.”

Me: “Certainly, sir. Can I get you anything else?”

Teenager #2: “Yeah, I’d like a pack of [Same Cigarette Brand].”

Me: “I told you 20 minutes ago that I wouldn’t sell you cigarettes. Now, you need to pay for the nachos and leave.”

(They end up grumbling, but pay for their food and leave. However, they don’t leave the parking lot, and instead hang around eating their food. I ignore them again and start making coffee. About ten minutes later, one of my older regulars shows up. He stops to talk to the boys on the way in, and then comes into the store.)

Me: “Hey, [Older Regular].”

(All the coffee is fresh, and once I finish with the trash, I can take a break and come outside and chat.)

Older Regular: “You know those boys are asking for people to buy them cigarettes, don’t you? I told them I wouldn’t, and that you knew I didn’t smoke anyway.”

Me: “Okay, well, I’ve had about enough of this.” *I go outside and talk to the teenagers.* “You guys need to leave now. You can’t loiter here, and you can’t keep harassing my customers to illegally buy you tobacco.”

Teenager #1: “Well, why don’t you make us? We ain’t doing nothing!”

Teenager #2: “Yeah, and this wouldn’t have happened if you’d been f***ing cool about it.”

(Fed up with this, I call dispatch, and explain to them about the two drunk teens. Two minutes later, I have three cop cars pull in and corner these two kids. One tries to run and is caught almost instantly. My regular and I go outside to watch.)

Cop: *also a regular* “Hey, [My Name]. These two the only ones who were bothering you?”

Me: “Yeah. So, what are you going to do to them?”

Cop: “We’ll take them down to the station and throw them in the drunk tank. We’ll call their parents once they sober up. Usually putting the fear of God in them is enough. Call us if they ever show up on your shift again!”

(My regular and I walked away laughing. It certainly made the rest of my shift more enjoyable, and the teens had a great story to tell at school Monday!)

Eat Your Own Words

, , , , | Related | August 17, 2017

(My mom, my grandmother, and I are having dinner. I’m in my teens and still eating a lot. I grab another pork chop from the center of the table.)

Mom: “Just because it’s there doesn’t mean you have to eat it.”

(Later on, Mom examines the juice she’s drinking.)

Mom: “This juice isn’t what I was expecting. I don’t really like it.”

Grandma: “So why do you keep drinking it?”

Mom: “I don’t know. It’s sitting there and I just forget and take another sip.”

Me: “Just because it’s there doesn’t mean you have to drink it.”

Mom: *glares at me*

Unfiltered Story #91498

, , | Unfiltered | August 15, 2017

(I work as the only tech support specialist for an agency of about 250 employees. We’re trying to roll out a new time clock system (called EWS going forward), and are currently in the process of setting up everyone’s accounts in prep for a test run for the system next week. I wrote a thorough document, complete with screenshots, on how to set up one’s account on EWS, which is basically a website. I also created two videos (one for each type of time clock we’re using under this new system) that go into as much detail as the document. I’ve basically addressed as best I know how two of the three learning styles common in adults (visual and auditory), and my hope was that by following one or the other, they could do the kinesthetic approach if that’s how they learn. So, having set that up…)

Caller:
“I can’t get EWS set up. I keep getting [common error that I recognize].”

Me: “Okay. Let’s start from the beginning. Click on Account Setup. On the next screen, enter [our agency ID], then your employee ID, date of birth, and last four of your SSN. You got all that?”

Caller: “Yes.”

Me: “Okay. Now this is where a lot of people get tripped up. On this screen, you will enter the username you want. But don’t include the @[agency ID].”

Caller: “Okay, I have that.”

 

(We run through the instructions and it still isn’t working. I feel compelled to ask:)
Me: “Okay. When you typed your user ID into the field on the account creation screen, did you include @[agency ID]?”

Caller: “Yes, because that’s what [Other Employee] told me to do.”

Me: “No. I know it’s weird, but when you do account setup, you just put in your username. Let’s try account setup again.”

(Gets to the username part.)

Me: “Now, tell me exactly what you’re typing in this field, please.”

Caller: “[username]@[agency ID]”

Me: “Please take off the @[agency ID] part before proceeding.”

Caller: “But [Other Employee] did hers this way. And my local area manager told me to do it this way too!”

Me: *takes a deep, quiet breath* “I understand that that’s how they told you to do it. Please just trust me. Take out @[agency ID], before you click Create Account.”

Caller: “Okay.” *tries to log in* “It worked! I’m in, thanks [Me]!”

Me: *barely keeps from saying ‘I told you so’* *wraps up call normally*

(With this website, when a user sets up an account, they create a user ID, but when logging in they use [email protected][agency ID], because the agency ID points to a database on a cloud server, kinda like how the @gmail.com points an email client to look at Gmail for your username (to put it in simple terms for those who don’t know computers well.)

IP Address:
208.80.208.132

Footloose With The Treatment

, , , , | Right | August 9, 2017

My aunt & uncle, both doctors, moved to rural Kentucky when they sold their practice and retired.

Since medical care is spotty in their area my aunt volunteers to make home visits to check on patients as support for local physicians.

One female patient in particular had been told to rest after surgery; when my aunt arrives the patient is bustling around the house, contrary to doctor’s orders.

When it was mentioned that she was supposed to be off her feet; apparently she had misunderstood the doctors orders of not putting your feet on the ground, as she replied “But I haven’t been outside all day!”

One Of The Hallmarks Of Not Paying Attention

, , , | Right | August 7, 2017

(A customer comes into the fabric store where I am working the cash register. She is in an obviously upset state.)

Customer: “Do you carry sign-in registers for guests at funerals?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, we don’t carry those.”

Customer: “Oh, my gosh; I don’t know what I will do. I have tried everywhere and can’t find one.”

Me: “Well, have you tried the Hallmark store next door? They have all kinds of paper goods.”

Customer: “I thought I was at Hallmark’s.”

Me: *looking around at our 5000 bolts of fabrics and shelves of scissors and other sewing related items* “No, ma’am, this is [Store].”

Customer: “Well, why didn’t you say so? That’s just rude.”

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