It Pays To Pay Attention

, , , | Right | February 26, 2021

I am at a sandwich shop that lets you pick your own ingredients and have the sandwich made in front of you. As I’m picking my vegetables, the customer ahead of me at the register suddenly shouts.

Customer: “What do you mean, no?!”

I look over, as does the employee helping me.

Cashier: “I mean that I know that that woman is not paying for your sandwich.”

She gestures her head toward me, which baffles me, as I’ve never seen this man before in my life.

Customer: “Well, that’s… I mean…”

He blusters a bit, glancing over at me a bit awkwardly.

Cashier: “This is the third time you’ve come in and tried to convince us that someone else is paying. Yeah, we remember. Now, that will be [price], and if you think about coming back to do it again, just don’t.”

The customer stands there, looking like he is flipping between being angry and being intimidated. Finally, he does pay, takes his sandwich, and shuffles out. I get up to pay and glance back over my shoulder.

Me: “Wow. Did he really try that before?”

Cashier: “Yeah. The first time, we didn’t catch it until after the other person had paid, so that was a whole mess, because of course, he’d run off.”

Me: “Ouch. Well, glad you could call him out now.”

Cashier: *Nods and leans in* “Yeah. Just, don’t tell my boss. He’ll just get mad about me ‘upsetting a customer.’”

Me: *Raising an eyebrow* “As if I wouldn’t be upset about being charged for someone else’s sandwich?”

The cashier just gave an eye-roll and a shrug, while his coworker nodded and laughed. Here’s hoping that guy learned his lesson and didn’t try that again.

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Dang, Even The Bookworms Are Doing The Tobacco Now!

, , , , | Right | February 23, 2021

I’m a gas station clerk. A young man comes to the counter and puts down his things, including a high school library book clearly stamped with “[Local High School] Library.” In other words, this kid is probably underage.

He has a non-alcoholic beverage and, after I ring him up, he decides to try to sneak one past me.

Young Man: “Can I also get [tobacco product]?”

Me: “Can I see your ID?”

He pretends to search his wallet for his identification and, after a moment, mutters:

Young Man: “I must have left it in my other wallet.”

I nod.

Me: “It happens to me all the time.”

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Animal Attraction, Part 3

, , , , | Right | February 17, 2021

I work as a vet’s assistant and I typically help with restraining the pets. Normally, I enter the room with a greeting to the pet.

Me: *To the dog* “Hiiiii, baby!”

Client: *Looks me up and down* “Well, hi there, honey!”

Me: “…”

I pet the dog, not realizing he was talking to me. The client turns to the veterinarian.

Client: “Well, d***, they’re always talking to the animals, ain’t they?”

Related:
Animal Attraction
Animal Attraction, Part 2

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Not Sugar-Coating It

, , | Right | January 27, 2021

I work at a gas station and grocery store, and every morning we make fresh-brewed sweet tea. We’re in the south where people love their sweet tea, but the management never orders enough sugar for us to sell to customers and to make our tea between trucks. When we run out of sugar, I don’t even bother making tea because no one wants unsweetened tea in the south.

A dude comes in trying to pour tea, realizing the canister is empty.

Dude: “Are y’all really out of tea?!”

Me: “Sorry, sir. I ran out of sugar so I decided to not make tea today, I can make more, but it’ll be unsweetened, do you want unsweetened tea?”

Dude: “H*** no!”

Me: “Then we’re out of tea. Have a nice day.”

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Didn’t You Learn To Use Your Words In Kindergarten?

, , , , , , | Romantic | January 20, 2021

My boyfriend and I are at a friend’s house when we witness this interaction. My friend’s boyfriend grabs her bra strap and pulls it. In response, she turns around and squeezes his balls. Then, my friend’s boyfriend honks her boob, so she pulls his leg hair.

My boyfriend and I are initially speechless!

Boyfriend: “If I ever do anything you don’t like, just tell me and I’ll stop.”

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