Laptop Flop, Part 23

, , , , , | Working | April 13, 2018

My laptop, which is vital to my schoolwork, has been experiencing charging issues. It will charge to a certain percentage, then stop. This percentage has been decreasing slowly over time, and as the laptop’s maximum charge begins nearing the single digits, I start to fear the worst. I schedule an appointment to have a technician come to my campus and replace the battery. In the call, I am also pushed into replacing the motherboard. I am concerned, but cannot risk losing my laptop, so I agree.

A week later, the technician arrives. He is an older man with glasses and a generally pleasant disposition. I bring him to our school’s library, and boot the machine to demonstrate the issues I am having. He seems to follow along just fine, so I power the machine down and pass it over.

I first begin to grow concerned when, as he removes the case and components, he removes his glasses and lumps the screws haphazardly together in the same pile, making no effort to remember where each one came from. I ask him about it, and he is quick to brush me off. After finally examining the pile — without glasses — he tells me that it does not matter where they go; they are all the same. I am confused, as many of them are clearly different lengths, but I say nothing, figuring he is more of an expert than I am.

More time passes as the technician speaks to me while he works. His progress is very slow, and it takes several hours before the new components are in and the moment of truth has arrived. He presses the power button, and… nothing. The screen is dark. I am panicked, but he assures me that the new board must be bad, and he puts the old board back in. Again, he pays no mind to the screws, and at the end of it several are left over, and he cannot determine where they should go. I am a little upset by this, but at this point I no longer care so long as the machine boots again.

Still nothing. At this point, it is so late that the library is closing, and we must leave to find a new place to work. We are now outdoors, in front of a local cafe. The man, frustrated by the lack of progress, calls another tech support official to help. The next two hours are a maddening string of being put on hold and unhelpful advice intermixed with failed attempts to revive my machine. At the end of it all, the technician gives up and hands my laptop back to me — still broken — telling me that I will have to send it in to be repaired. Frantically, I tell him that I can’t; my classes demand I have access to my computer, and there is no way I can go that long without it without suffering academically. He tells me that waiting for new parts will probably take longer, anyway, and would be much more likely to fail again.

This technician’s “repair” ends with a previously perfectly operational laptop becoming totally unbootable. It no longer responds to any attempts I make to restart it. I now have to send it in and hope that it shows up in one piece. I have long given up hope that any of my data will be recoverable. And I still have a single mystery screw hiding in my pocket.

Laptop Flop, Part 22
Laptop Flop, Part 21
Laptop Flop, Part 20

Revolving Blame

, , , , , | Related | April 9, 2018

(It’s the early 2000s and I am in my early teens. My dad takes my two younger brothers and me on a vacation to Mammoth Cave. We go through a large section of the cave as the guide explains and shows us the formations and other cool things. We get to the last section of the tour, and the guide says that once we are done exploring we can go up the stairs and exit through a revolving doors and wait in the bus for the rest of the group. After a few more minutes we decide we have seen enough and start for the exit. We are the first people to leave the group, and once we get to the top of the stairs, we see the revolving door, as expected. My dad sees a button beside the door.)

Dad: “Oh, this must be for the revolving door.”

(He presses the button, and the door does not move.)

Dad: “Huh.”

(He pushes the button again. As he presses it the second time, I notice a light flicker on just above the door.)

Me: “Oh, it looks like it turns the light above the door off and on.”

Dad: “That’s strange.”

(We go out to the bus and my dad takes one of my brothers to the bathroom as we wait. While they are gone, other people start to trickle in. Each one loudly exclaims how crazy it was that the lights suddenly went out. My other brother and I freeze as we piece together what happened.)

Me: “We… might have been the ones that did that.”

(Once my dad and other brother got back, we filled them in on what we had done, as the bus was booming with chatter about the sudden blackout. We confessed to the tour guide — who was surprisingly calm — what we did. He then informed us that we had turned off one third of the lights to the entire cave system! Thank goodness we pushed it that second time!)

Time To Hops Into The Shower

, , , , , | Right | April 5, 2018

(I work at a campground. I’m on the phone with my supervisor because I need to place a maintenance request to fix a toilet that isn’t wanting to flush. It’s also Fourth of July weekend, our busiest weekend.)

Me: “Yeah, the first toilet will not flush. It’s going to get clogged, but I don’t think it is yet.”

Supervisor: “All right, I’ll send maintenance down there in a minute.”

Me: “Other than that, it doesn’t seem that bad.”

Supervisor: “That’s good.”

Me: “Well, that’s interesting!”

Supervisor: “What did you find?”

Me: “Someone had fun in the shower last night.”

Supervisor: “How do you know?”

Me: “I found two beer bottles in the shower.”

Unfiltered Story #108210

, , , | Unfiltered | April 3, 2018

(This takes place when I still worked at my store from 6 am – 2 pm as a cashier. Someone had to quit the morning shift and placed me as the morning cashier, a.k.a I’m the only one in a actual lane until the other cashiers arrive around 10 am. This takes place one morning while checking out a customer.)

Me: “Alright, do you have a loyalty card with us toda—”

(Suddenly, an elderly lady decides to come around my check-lane and interrupts my conversation with the customer.)

Elderly Lady: “Excuse me, is there anyone that can check me out? I need to do this quickly as possible.”

(She proceeds to go to the next check lane. Again, I am the only cashier currently there; plus, I’m currently helping someone else. And the kicker, our cash registers only let us log into one cash register when we are working. And yes, we do have self-checkout.)

Me: “Umm, I’m sorry but I am the only cashier here at the moment.”

(The elderly lady quickly takes her only item, a box of strawberries, and heads to the self checkout.)

Customer: “Should have done that from the beginning…”

(My thoughts exactly.)

Unfiltered Story #108206

, , , | Unfiltered | April 2, 2018

(I work in a small bulk grocery/restaurant supply store that has ‘Food Service’ in its name. This is key to the story as with most retail establishments we greet customers on the phone with the full name of the store.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [store name]. This is [My Name]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Hi. I was in y’alls store the other day trying to make an appointment with one of your representatives and I had to leave before we could get anything set up. Is there any way I can schedule something over the phone?”

(Despite us being a grocery store, this question isn’t too out of the ordinary as we do have sales reps that make appointments with potential customers to set up truck deliveries. I’m assuming that’s what this is about.

Me: “Okay, ma’am, I can pass along your information to a manager and we’ll get that taken care of. What was this appointment regarding?”

Customer: “Well, I dropped my iPhone 6 the other day and now it won’t charge when I plug it in. My contract is up next month and—”

(I don’t hear the rest of the woman’s spiel as I have to turn away from the receiver to keep from laughing. One of my coworkers standing nearby can tell I’m trying not to lose it and is giving me an inquisitive look. I manage to compose myself just as the customer is done ranting.)

Me: “Uh, ma’am, I’m sorry but you have a wrong number. We’re [store name], not [wireless carrier].”

Customer: “Who?”

Me: “[Store name], ma’am.”

Customer: “Oh, sorry.” *click*

(I hang up the phone and burst out laughing.)

Coworker: What the hell was that about?

Me: Some woman apparently thought we could fix her iPhone…Seriously, did she not hear me say [Store Name] during that introduction? What are we going to do? Add an app that turns her phone into a condiment dispenser?

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