The Invisible Creep

, , , , | Learning | July 20, 2020

A friend of mine is in college taking a course in the sociology of the imaginary. The professor comes to talk about invisibility. 

Professor: “What would you do if you could be invisible?”

Male Student #1: “I’d go in the girls’ locker room.”

Criticism instantly pops up from the class.

Male Student #2: “Seriously, at twenty years old, there are other ways to see naked girls.”

Female Student #1: “And then, there are better things to do than to see people naked without their consent.”

[Male Student #1] realizes that he has shocked everyone and tries to defend himself.

Male Student #1: “But I never said it would be non-consensual.”

Female Student #2: “Because you need to be invisible to go and watch naked chicks who are willing to let you watch them?”

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If This Is Too Complicated, Is College Right For You?

, , , , , | Learning | July 18, 2020

I work for an online university assisting people with their applications. If a student has transfer credits, they can submit a transcript request form, which gives us permission to request their transcripts on their behalf so they don’t have to pay the transcript fee. Some schools will require this form to be signed by hand as a means of fraud prevention. In this case, the student has to print out the form and do the full thing by hand; they can’t fill it out on the computer then just print that and sign it, which is what some try to do. This student, however, takes that to a new extreme.

We start working together two months before the registration deadline, so I feel confident that we will be able to get everything in on time. She submits all of her documents except for one — a hand-signed transcript request form. I send her an email with the form attached as a PDF and explicit instructions on how to complete it and send it back to us. For two weeks, I call her about twice a week, as is our policy, and every time, she says she’ll get to it later. 

Finally, I receive a notification that she sent us a form that cannot be processed. I check, and she sure did print out the PDF… and only signed the bottom, leaving the entire rest of the document blank. 

I give her a call to explain that she needs to do the whole thing by hand. She says she already completed it, and I tell her that yes, we got the form with her signature, but she needs to put in the school’s information, too, so we know where to send that form. She seems to understand and I hope she’ll turn it in.

Cue several weeks of me calling her, her insisting she already did the form, and me explaining how to do it over again. Finally, it’s two weeks before the deadline and the form still isn’t in. On top of that, she needs to complete some additional forms before her financial aid can be awarded, so I send her clear instructions on how to complete those forms. A week passes, and she hasn’t even logged into her financial aid account to get started on the forms.

I’m out of the office for a couple of days, and while I’m away, my team lead reaches out to some of my students who still need to complete documents. She tries to connect with this student, who neither answers her phone nor responds to her email but resubmits the transcript request form. It is the exact same form, blank except for her hand signature at the bottom.

At this point, it is the last week before the deadline and I am so frustrated trying to help this woman that I ask one of my coworkers who’s been here for five years to reach out to her to see if maybe she can make the student understand. She sends an extremely detailed email instructing how to do every step, from writing down the school name to noting the present date. I think that will be sufficient and wait for the completed form to arrive.

Two days later, I receive another notification that the student uploaded a document that cannot be processed. It is the exact same form, completely blank but for her hand signature. 

Thank God I’m working from home so no one could look at me funny while I throw up my hands and scream.

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Unfiltered Story #200723

, , | Unfiltered | July 16, 2020

I work for an athletics department and we were getting ready for a football game. An older man had fallen and was having a seizure or stroke on the side of the drive in front of the Athletics building. I’m helping control traffic as it’s a narrow road.
I stop a couple and move them to the side to allow campus security to get through. They roll down their window and ask me where they can park for the football game.

Uncle Irritating Meets Aunt Flo

, , , , , , , | Related | July 15, 2020

My late uncle could be the soul of kindness where his nieces and nephews were concerned… but he could also be the most irritating man on the planet.

He was a security guard at the university I attended and was often stationed in the library at the front door, checking book bags, usually with a male student who was part of the on-campus student patrol.

Whenever I came through the line, Uncle Irritating would announce, “Oh, this one looks like trouble; better go through everything.”

And he and the student would gleefully remove all my stuff from my pocketbook and my bookbag. One day, after he had made me late for a class, I decided that was it.

The next time I heard him say he would be at the library, I fixed up a bag and headed to the library after a class. When I made to leave, my uncle announced that I was a dangerous thief and he and the male student started opening up my bookbag and pocketbook.

Maybe it wasn’t the best revenge, but they had to remove lots and lots and lots of individual sanitary napkins and tampons in order to get to anything important. The student guard was turning bright red and my uncle was truly peeved. They stuffed everything back in and returned it to me.

“Are we done?” I asked.

My uncle smiled sweetly. We never mentioned it to the family. Ever after, I was able to go through the book check line without being treated as a subject in a Candid Camera episode.

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You Didn’t Yell, Because They Remember The Ones That Do

, , , , | Right | July 11, 2020

Over the summer, our local bus service has changed some routes and added new routes and stops. I am very glad about one change because the stop is much closer to the buildings that my classes are in. I end up missing the first bus, likely because I wasn’t close enough to the stop. I wait just over twenty minutes for the next bus. I make sure that both the bus stop sign and I are visible.

I try to make eye contact with the bus driver, but he speeds past the stop anyway. It is Friday and it is hot outside and I am uncomfortable due to washing dishes for a long time and clearing for a work-experience class.

I get very upset and call the main office for the bus. Since I am not used to letting myself be angry and show it, I think I sound like I am doing a mix of crying and yelling.

Customer Service Rep: “Hello, this is [Customer Service Rep], how may I help you?”

Me: “Hi. I was just at one of the bus stops for the [route letters] and the bus completely skipped my stop, twice.”

Customer Service Rep: “Where was this?”

Me: “It was at [Stop]. I mean, why would there be a stop there if no one is going to stop there?”

I don’t recall exactly what she says, but she tries to get information about the stop, such as the time that the bus was supposed to get there, where I was, and more. By now, I am calmer and feel bad for yelling at her. I also realize that I counted the one that I figured I missed, and make sure to let her know.

Customer Service Rep: “All right, I am going to put in a report for you. May I have your name and phone number?”

Me: “It’s [My Name] and my phone number is [number]. Thank you.”

Customer Service Rep: “No problem. And can you tell me the bus, stop, and time once more?”

Me: “Yeah, it was the [route] at 2:29, but it was supposed to be there at 2:26, but that part was okay. And it was the one on [Road] across from [On-Campus Hotel]. I think the stop number was six.”

Customer Service Rep: “Okay, I’ll submit that for you. There is also another [route that has the same destination, but takes longer] at the library [the on-campus transit center] in about twenty minutes, if you don’t mind taking a bit longer to get home.”

Me: “I’m headed there now, thank you.”

We end the conversation and I get home. I feel bad about yelling at her since she didn’t do anything wrong. She was very helpful and she remained calm the whole time. It was the bus driver who skipped me, not her. I call the office back the following Monday.

Customer Service Rep: “Hello, this is [My Name]; how can I help you?”

Me: “Hi. I called last Friday and ended up yelling at the woman I was talking to. I don’t remember her name, but I want to apologize to her.”

Customer Service Rep: *Surprised for a moment* “Oh? Hm, I don’t think it was me. I think I’d remember that.”

Me: “I had called because the bus I take skipped my stop Friday afternoon.”

Customer Service Rep: “Oh! That was me! I remember that!”

Me: “I am really sorry if I yelled at you. You didn’t do anything wrong, so you didn’t deserve to be yelled at. I had gotten really upset and ended up yelling.”

Customer Service Rep: “I don’t think you yelled. But you had every right to be upset. That is a frustrating situation. Thank you for apologizing, though!”

She sounded surprised, as though no one usually apologized for that kind of thing. I am very glad I called, though. I can’t be sure, but I think that we were both happy when we hung up the phone.

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