Savings In Disguise

, , , , , , | Romantic | October 15, 2019

(I’m studying to get my certification to sell insurance. A friend sends me a joke and I read it aloud to my boyfriend.)

Me: “Would a Transformer get car insurance or life insurance?”

Boyfriend: *pause* “He can just bundle and save.”

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Tossing About Some One-Liners

, , , , , , | Working | September 25, 2019

(A woman comes in to pick up her order. I realize that her entrees are ready, but whoever took the order neglected to make her side salads.)

Me: “And if you’ll just give me about a minute and a half, I’ll have your salads out. You’re welcome to have a seat while you wait.”

Customer: “No problem!”

(I move over to the salad bar, about fifteen feet behind the register, but still visible. I quickly make her salads and close the plastic containers. As I’m bagging them, one slips out of my hands and flips over into the tray of lettuce. Still wearing gloves, I quickly grab it and finish bagging, hoping nobody saw my fumble. I turn to the register, where I see she is still standing.)

Customer: “One almost got away, huh?” *chuckles*

Me: *feeling my face get warm* “I like to consider it ‘a free upgrade to a tossed salad!’”

(She laughed as she thanked me and left. About a week later, she called again and asked for a “tossed salad” upgrade with her dinner.)

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Unfiltered Story #167566

, , , | Unfiltered | September 19, 2019

(I work at a well-known grocery store in the southeast. This particular store is in a very affluent area. It’s been a slow morning so far.)

Me: *talking with cashier*

(Suddenly, a lady comes towards the end of the checkout lanes with her cart. She has a birthday cake from the bakery in her cart.)

Customer: Can I come through here?

(While she has been talking and deciding where to go, a man has stepped up to one of the open lanes and has begun his transaction.)

Customer: *loudly and abrasively* God d***it! I hate when people are rude! What a rude SOB! So rude! That really p***es me off! Some people are so rude! *to me* Oh, I’m going to need someone to help me out with this today.

(I force a smile and assist her as she continues to go on and on about how some people are just so rude. Even as we are leaving the store and walking behind the man, she continues.)

Customer: Thanks for all your help. Here, my car is this way.

(Turns out that she has parked her car underneath our “breezeway”, which is clearly marked for no parking!)

Me: *finishes loading up her car) Have a good day, ma’am!

Customer: Well, it would have been if it weren’t for that rude man!

Billed Them As A Scammer Before They Presented A Bill

, , , , , , | Right | August 22, 2019

(It’s Saturday and I’m on my till along with my other five coworkers trying to get the rush of customers down. It is about one o’clock and the line keeps at a steady thirty or forty customers. I only have about ten minutes until my shift was over. I decide that the young woman next in line will be my last for the day.) 

Me: “Hi. How are you?” 

Customer: “I’m great! Thank you!” 

(She places three small items on my counter and is already holding a fifty-dollar bill, prepared to pay. I scan each item and tell her her total.) 

Me: “Your total is $23.52. Cash?” 

(The lady nods and presents me with the fifty-dollar bill. I type in the amount and give her her change of $26.48. She smiles and leaves as I flick off my till light and begin to clean. I hear a knock on my register counter about five minutes later. It is the same lady, holding her change with an angry look.) 

Me: “Everything okay?” 

Customer: “I gave you a hundred-dollar bill. You didn’t give me all my change.” 

(Here we go. Either she honestly didn’t realize she was holding a fifty-dollar bill the entire time or it’s a scamming act I’ve seen many times before.) 

Me: “All right, I’m pretty sure you gave me a fifty-dollar bill, but I’ll print my till totals and count my drawer real quick.” 

Customer: “I don’t time for you to do that. Just give me my correct change. I know I gave you a hundred-dollar bill.” 

Me: “Oh, don’t worry; it will take less than two minutes. You see, I also work in our change office in the mornings as an emergency backup when our regular coworker doesn’t show up. I’ve had to get all the tills out in about ten minutes before we open.” 

(She sits there arms crossed and getting kind of nervous. Scam alert.) 

Me: “All right, my cash came to $1,678.77. Will you read me that top number on the total slip that printed in front of you?”

(The customer hesitates but grabs the totals and looks at the top number in bold.) 

Customer: “$1678.77…” 

(She ends balling it up and throwing it at me and storming off.) 

Me: “Have a great day!” 

(I took this particular customer because she is known for doing this and didn’t want any of my other newer coworkers to deal with her, because if your drawer is short five or more dollars it’s an automatic write-up. I ended up texting the manager of the store next to us and, sure enough, the same lady did the same thing after leaving my store.)

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This Salon Has Very Bad Reception, Part 2

, , , , , , | Working | August 14, 2019

(A few months after I move, I decide to get a haircut at a salon in a nearby mall. I get to the salon about five minutes early for my appointment and check in with the receptionist, who tells me my hair stylist will be with me in a few minutes. As I’m sitting in the waiting area I notice that all of the chairs are empty, and the hair stylists are all standing around chatting at the back of the salon. Ten minutes after my appointment was supposed to be, I start to get antsy and think about reminding the receptionist I’m here when my cell phone rings.)

Me: “Hello?”

Receptionist: “Hi, I’m calling from [Salon] because we had you booked for an appointment at two. Are you on your way?”

Me: *looking right at the receptionist, who can clearly see me from the desk* “Actually, I’m here now; I’ve been waiting for fifteen minutes.”

Receptionist: “Oh! You know, you’re supposed to check in when you get here so I can tell your stylist to get ready for you.”

Me: “I did check in. You told me she’d be with me in a few minutes. Like I said, I’ve been waiting on her for fifteen minutes. Plus, I had to pass the desk to get to the waiting area, so you would have seen me come in even if I forgot to check in.”

Receptionist: “Okay, well, I’m going to tell the stylist you’re here, but your appointment might go longer than usual because you’re late.”

(She did get up and tell the stylist I was there, who came and got me into a chair immediately. The stylist apologized and said she’d seen me waiting but she didn’t realize I was there for her.)

This Salon Has Very Bad Reception

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