(I’m at the grocery store, trying to ignore the loud-mouthed woman who keeps berating her three-year-old son for getting in front of her buggy. I have sent her a few nasty looks, and so have some of the other shoppers, but as I’m not a confrontational individual, I’m hesitant to say anything. I’m watching as she keeps grabbing his hand and yanking him to the side any time he gets in her way.)

Other Shopper: “You shouldn’t talk to that baby that way.”

Loud-Mouthed Woman: “Shut the f*** up!”

(She grabs her kid and goes to another aisle. It happens that I come across them a few aisles later, and she’s still yelling at her kid. Eventually, he gets in front of her again, and this time she rams her cart into him, knocking him down on the cold, concrete floor. He busts his nose, hard, and starts screaming.)

Loud-Mouthed Woman: “That’s what you get! I told you not to get in front of me!”

(I come up behind her and ram my cart into her hard enough to knock her forward.)

Loud-Mouthed Woman: “OW! Hey! What the f***? Watch where you’re going!”

Me: “Doesn’t feel so good, does it? B****.”

Loud-Mouthed Woman: “F*** you!”

Me: “No, f*** you! That baby doesn’t deserve what you’re doing. You’re an abusive mother.”

(By this time, another shopper had notified the manager of the incident and they saw to the kid, whose nose wasn’t broken, but we could tell he was still hurting. Since there were so many witnesses to what the woman did for the past thirty minutes, and because she basically attacked her child, the manager decided to call the police about the situation. There were a lot of negative things said about her. I don’t know if CPS was called, or what the police did, but I hope she learned a lesson, either way.)

(I work at an apartment complex and have had this job for a little less than a year. A great deal of my job consists of being b****ed at by entitled parents, residents, or both. I have received a phone call from a mom who is angry because her son cannot move in until the middle of the month. All new students cannot move in until this date, but are required to pay for the full month because their leases are in a lump sum that is divided into equal payments.)

Me: “Ma’am, we cannot let your son move in early because we would still be preparing his room on that day.”

Mom: “No! This is not okay! No one told my son that! We should have the first month prorated because he can’t move in.”

(The lease he signed and the paperwork he initialed reiterate these points before a customer is done. I’m also pretty confident my student staff members reminded the customer of this.)

Me: “Ma’am, we can’t accommodate that. We don’t prorate because his rate would be more expensive each month after if we did that. His lease acts similar to a loan. We loan him the space, and we take payment in 12 equal instalments.”

Mom: “No! That doesn’t make any sense. I want to speak to a manager!”

Me: “I am a manager.”

Mom: “Then not you. Where’s your boss?”

(My boss recently stepped out for lunch.)

Me: “I’m the manager here right now, and I can assure you that you will get the same response from my boss.”

Mom: “I want the corporate number! What is that?!”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. Let me get that for you.”

(I give her the number.)

Mom: “What is your name? I want that, too!”

(I give her my name.)

Me: “Do you need help with anything else?”

Mom: “No!”

Me: “Okay, well, if you have any other questions, let us know. Have a good—”

Mom: “No! No! No!”

(She hung up on me. Gotta love parents and their entitled children.)

(I’ve already had a particularly bad morning. Due to nightmares, I didn’t get much sleep. The coworker that gives me my keys to the fuel station is very late, and once I finally open up shop I’m swamped with customers for two hours because the pay-at-the-pump system is malfunctioning. Prepay works just fine. This customer interaction happens while tech support is on the phone, fixing the problem.)

Me: “Hello. What can I do for you?”

Customer: “Hey, I don’t know what’s going on. I’m trying to use my card outside and it’s not working. I don’t know what’s going on.”

Me: “Yeah, I think pay-at-the-pump is messing up. I’m already on the phone with tech support trying to fix it.”

Customer: “So, then, it’s not working?”

Me: “Outside, it’s not, but you can pay in here and it’ll work fine. I just need an amount to set the prepay.”

Customer: “So… it’s not working?”

(I try not to repeat myself verbatim, out of fear of sounding snarky towards her.)

Me: “Pay-at-the-pump is not, no, but if you pay in here, it’ll work just fine.”

Customer: “Okay, it’s not; I’ll just go somewhere else.”

(As she left, the customer behind her, who heard everything, paid by card to prepay his own pump, and the transaction went through with no issue.)

(My mother and I are driving home from a long trip. It is evening and we still have a ways to go, so we decide to go through the drive-thru of a nearby coffee shop. Note that the time is about 15 minutes to close for this location.)

Order Taker: *in a bad accent* “Hola! What can I giggity-get started for you?”

Mom: *chuckles* “Two mochas, please; hold the whipped cream.”

Order Taker: “That’s two chocos minus the sweet top. Anything else?”

Mom: “No, that’s all.”

Order Taker: “Bea-ooootiful. That’ll be 80 kabillion dollars at the next window.”

(My mom and I cracked up laughing. Thanks, silly order taker, for making our long drive a little less tiring!)

(A customer comes in to return two items. She does not have a receipt or the boxes for either product. She looks like a hippie version of a Jersey Shore cast member.)

Me: “Without a receipt or the original boxes, we can only do an exchange or give you the money back on a merchandise credit.”

Customer: “Oh, no, that won’t work. I really need the money, and I can’t use these products on my face because my friend just started an organic skin care line. I only use organic products on my face now. Please, I just really need the money.”

(My manager is right next to me. I explain the situation and she tells her the same thing I did. She continues to ask if we can call someone else over. We call another manager over, who tells her the same thing.)

Customer: “Please, I need the money for my rent. Can I buy something with the merchandise credit and return it and get cash back?”

Manager: “No, we can only refund in the original form of payment.”

(She decides to take the merchandise credit, which is over $100. I ask for her email for our rewards program.)

Customer: “Oh, I don’t trust computers, except for Facebook!”

(I show her some products she’s interested in. She proceeds to apply a lipstick directly to her lips without it being cleaned off and disinfected. Thinking this would be a concern, since she only wants organic products, I tell her I can clean it off for her.)

Customer: “Oh, I don’t care!”

(When she checked out, she spent the whole merchandise credit, plus $30. I thought she “really needed the money.”)