We Would Automatically Love Anyone Who Gave Us A Free Cookie

, , | Friendly | December 3, 2018

(Our grocery store gives away free cookies to small children. I’ve tried to teach my children to always ask politely, and remember their thank-yous. However, my three-year-old son has figured out a more efficient way of acquiring cookies.)

Son: “Hello! I think you’re very pretty!”

Cashier: “What a nice boy! Here: have a cookie! Have two!”

Son: “Thank you! I love you!”

Unfiltered Story #130198

, , | Unfiltered | December 3, 2018

A customer asks where the bathroom is located. I told them it was at the end of aisle six, so they proceeded to walk to the end of Aisle 6 and take a leak right then and there. Meanwhile, the bathroom is down a small corridor that clearly has the markings for a bathroom above it.

Unfiltered Story #129873

, , | Unfiltered | December 2, 2018

Coworker: “I’m sorry, this is copyrighted so we can’t copy it.”

Customer #1: “Well this was copied before!”

Coworker: “Well they weren’t supposed to copy it.”

Customer #2: “Mom, don’t argue with her! She’ll lose her job!”

Customer #1: “Okay then, copy this!” *angrily throws paper on counter*

Customer #2: “Don’t throw it at her!”

Customer #1: “Shut your mouth!”

You Are What You Eat

, , , , , | Related | December 1, 2018

(Overheard between a customer and her approximately ten-year-old child:)

Child: “Mom, can we get some Nerds?”

Customer: “You are a nerd, my love.”

(She let him get the Nerds.)

What’s The Deal?

, , , , , | Right | December 1, 2018

(As with most retail jobs, I have a few questions I have to ask each customer as I’m cashing them out. Some variation of this happens a few times per day.)

Me: “So, with your purchase today, you can get any of—”

Customer: *cutting me off* “I don’t want any; just let me pay.”

Me: “Okay but—”

Customer: “Just let me pay!” *forcibly inserts chip card into reader before it’s active*

Me: *cashes them out*

Customer: “Wait, what’s this $4.98 thing?”

Me: “It’s our purchase with purchase. With a purchase, you can get these items for $4.98 instead of their original listed prices.”

Customer: “Why didn’t you tell me about that?”

Me: “You said you weren’t interested.”

Customer: “Well, can I still get the deal?”

(Ah, yes, thank you for ignorantly dragging down my units per transaction and average sale amount, while also destroying percentage stats for every employee working that day and slowing down the line-up. I really want to do you a favour right now.)

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