Floored By Their Negligence

, , | Right | April 11, 2018

(A customer is purchasing a computer chair.)

Me: “What kind of floor is it going on?”

Customer: *all proud-sounding* “Hardwood!”

Me: “All right. Can I suggest some rubber casters, or a hardwood chair mat to put on your floor?”

Customer: “Why?”

Me: “Because without one of those, your floor will get wrecked.”

Customer: “Why? What are the wheels that it comes with made of?”

Me: “Plastic. They’ll definitely scratch your floor.”

Customer: “Oh. No. I don’t care about my floor.”

Has Some Hang-Ups Over Your Options

, , | Right | April 11, 2018

(This is all done over the phone.)

Me: “Hello. Welcome to [Company]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “I want to end the call, and I don’t know how.”

Me: “I’m sorry; you want to hang up?”

Customer: “Yes. How do I do that? There’s no option for that in the menu.”

Me: “You… hang up.”

Customer: “Oh… Okay, thanks!” *click*

Not As Sour As The Customer

, , , | Right | April 11, 2018

(Every summer, my town hosts a big fair. I am working at said fair, serving drinks, when a woman comes up and orders a lemonade.)

Me: “One lemonade, coming right up!”

(All drinks are made fresh in front of the customer. I have just finished adding sugar to the water and lemon juice when the woman starts screaming at me.)

Woman: “Hey! Did you just put sugar in my lemonade?!”

Me: “Uh… Yes.”

Woman: “What’s wrong with you?! It’s mandatory that you ask people if they want sugar in their drinks before making them! There are people out there with diabetes!”

(Having worked in food services for a while, I know this is pure BS, but I remain polite.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. I’ll make you a new one. No sugar in this one, right?”

Woman: “D*** straight!”

(I give her the sugarless lemonade. She takes a sip and makes a face before tossing the drink in the trash.)

Woman: “It’s too sour!”

Early Bird Gets The… Punishment?

, , , | Learning | April 11, 2018

(I’m a student in the 11th grade, and this semester, two of my classes happen to be in the same hall, so I carry around a book-bag with both class books in it so I don’t have to go back upstairs to switch them out. I have really bad anxiety, so I try my best not to be late for my history class, which is right after photography, since the teacher is very strict and has it out for me already. I leave class right after the bell rings and head down to my class, as I don’t have anything else to do. When I arrive, the door is open as students from the last class are leaving, and my teacher is talking to another teacher, so I walk in and wait for the others to arrive to set up the table. After a couple minutes, the other teacher leaves, my teacher turns to me, and the following exchange occurs:)

Teacher: “You realize that you came into class thirty seconds after the bell rang?”

Me: *confused, and not quite sure what he’s getting at* “Yeah?”

Teacher: “Where were you?”

Me: “In class. It’s right down the hall from yours.”

Teacher: “Yeah, I know, but you’re still here early. Why?”

Me: *getting even more confused, as he’s annoyed that I was on time* “I didn’t want to get yelled at for being late.”

Teacher: “Well, don’t do it again. You don’t need to be so early all the time.”

(I was very confused by the end, as it was the first time that I had ever been told off for being on time. Maybe next time I’ll just walk in late and actually give him a reason to get mad at me.)

Disproportionately Cents-less

, , , , | Right | April 11, 2018

(I am the manager of a chain bookstore location. Customers who purchase items on our website can return online purchases to any store location; we simply enter the order number into the register and the computer takes care of the rest by processing the refund amount to the original method of payment — credit card, gift card, etc. The customer gets a print-out to show that the return has been processed. On this particular day, I am on the floor when a cashier at the cash desk has just processed an online return for a customer.)

Cashier: “[My Name], can you help out with this?”

(I approach the cash desk.)

Me: “What can I help with?”

Customer: “I returned this online order, but the computer isn’t refunding the correct amount!”

(I look at the return print-out and see that the original purchase was $53.21, and the refund amount processed is $53.20. Starting to wonder if the customer is really upset over a difference of ONE CENT, I speak with the customer.)

Me: “I apologize. The computer must have rounded off the tax differently when it did the original purchase to when it calculated the refund amount.”

Customer: “So? It charged the one cent to my credit card! What are you going to do about it?!”

(Canada stopped using pennies a few years ago, so now our lowest coin in circulation is five cents. Realizing it’s pointless to even begin to argue with a customer over ONE CENT, I open the till and give the customer a nickel.)

Me: “Here’s five cents.”

Customer: *suddenly happy* “Thank you!” *she walks off*

(Over 15 years in retail and over five years as a manager, and that was the first time I ever had somebody upset over ONE PENNY!)

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