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Ignorance Is Strength

, , , | Friendly | June 15, 2025

I was at the cash register purchasing some last-minute Christmas items. I overhear the following exchange from two women beside me.

Lady #1: “What was the book she wanted?”

Lady #2: “Oh, what was it called… 1984?…”

Lady #1: “Who is it by?”

Lady #2: “No idea.”

Lady #1: “Well, how many books are in the series?”

Lady #2: “I’m not sure… I think it’s just the one so far…”

At this point, I was able to elicit a laugh from the cashier using eye movements, which indicated “are you hearing this s***?”

Did A Dog Steal His Wife Or Something?

, , , , , , , , , | Working | January 14, 2025

I’m working front-of-house in a pet store with my manager and a new hire. A couple of first-time pet parents have just arrived with an adorable little golden retriever pup. Since it’s a slow day and there are no other customers demanding my attention, I spend quite some time helping them pick out products, giving them plenty of advice, and admittedly fawning over their little boy.

Once they have everything they need (and a few things they don’t), I’m about to lead them to the front counter to check out when [New Hire] calls out to us with a tone like he just smelled manure.

New Hire: “If you’re done acting like that f****** dog deserves love and affection, you’re supposed to be working.”

I freeze in my tracks, appalled at his attitude. I’ll admit to standing there with my mouth open for a bit before [Manager] steps forward.

Manager: “Right, get out of here.”

New Hire: “What?!”

Manager: “Get out. You’re fired. I don’t need d****ebags working here who think it’s wrong to care about your pets.”

New Hire: “F*** off! It’s a f****** dog! I’m f****** sick of people fawning over mutts like they’re someone’s baby!”

Manager: “Then you’re a horrible human being with no respect for anyone but your own kind. Get out.”

New Hire: “F*** you, you fat—”

Manager: “GET OUT OF MY STORE!”

[New Hire] flees out the front door. [Manager] proceeds to add a gift card to the couple’s purchase as an apology for his behaviour.

A couple of days later, I’m approached by a woman who I discover is my manager’s boss.

Manager’s Boss: “I’m told you were present when [New Hire] was fired.”

Me: “Yes…?”

Manager’s Boss: “Did [Manager] really fire [New Hire] because he insulted someone for caring about their dogs?”

Me: “Yes, he did.”

Manager’s Boss: “And did [New Hire] really insult someone for caring about their dogs?”

Me: “That’s putting it mildly, but yes.”

Manager’s Boss: “Then good riddance to him. I don’t know why someone who looks down on caring about your pets even applied to be hired at a store based on caring for your pets, let alone how he got hired.”

I do believe I may have found my forever workplace.

We Can’t Recall Ever Hearing Anything So Stupid!

, , , , , , , , , | Working | December 31, 2024

A little while ago, we came across a news item: our kids’ favourite store-brand breakfast item had been recalled due to possible listeriosis. We checked our freezer, and sure enough, we had two boxes within the affected expiry dates: one opened and one not.

My husband called the store where we bought them. They said to bring them in and go to any cash register, as all cashiers had been trained on product recalls. So, he took them in. But, of course, when he got there, the cashier had no idea what he was talking about, even after he showed them the news story about the recall. So, the cashier called their manager.

Manager: “Why do you want a refund?”

Husband: “Because the product has been recalled due to the possibility of listeriosis.”

Manager: “But this box is opened.”

Husband: “Yes. This news story is from this morning. We didn’t know about the recall when we opened the box.”

Manager: “I can’t give you a full refund for a partially eaten product.”

Husband: “It’s been recalled. It’s not safe to eat. Your company is quoted in this news article saying we can bring it back for a full refund.”

Manager: “But you’ve already eaten some of it. Did you get sick?”

Husband: “Not yet…”

In the end, they did refund my husband, but both the cashier and manager clearly thought my husband was trying to scam them somehow. I have no idea how they didn’t know about a product recall that had already hit the national news… or about food recalls in general.

Who’s The F***-Up Now?

, , , , , , , | Working | September 27, 2024

I am a manager at a supermarket on the night shift. This remains the most baffling reason someone has ever behaved in a manner that got them fired.

[New Hire] has just started his shift today. This is, by his own admission, his first retail job. The night shift restocking can largely be separated into two phases. First, the night’s new arrival of product is emptied onto the shelves, or delivered to the back room if there’s no room on the shelves, and then we bring out stock from the back room to fill up any other empty spaces where applicable.

At the end of the first phase, [New Hire] loads up any of the unplaced product onto a pallet, brings it toward the back room… and makes the corner a little too sharply. I watch as the edge of the pallet slams into the wall, and the pallet jack halts abruptly enough for [New Hire] to end up on his a**. Fortunately, the pile of product on the pallet doesn’t topple, but I still go over to make sure [New Hire] is all right.

[Long-Timer] beats me there and starts yelling.

Long-Timer: “Get the f*** out of here! Yes, you! Get your things and f*** off! Go! Get out!”

Me: “Hey, slow your roll, [Long-Timer]. What do you think you’re doing?”

Long-Timer: “You saw what he did, [My Name]! He needs to f*** off!”

Me: “Okay, first of all, you don’t have the authority to fire people—”

Long-Timer: “I’m not firing him; I’m telling him to f*** off!”

I resist the urge to point out that that’s basically what a firing IS.

Me: “Secondly, [New Hire] hasn’t done anything wrong. Yes, he took the corner a little too hard, but he didn’t hurt anyone or break anything, so—”

Long-Timer: “He f***ed up! He was using the pallet jack, and he f***ed up!”

Me: “That’s… not a good reason for him to leave. [New Hire], are you hurt?”

New Hire: “No, I’m all right.”

Me: “Then carry on. Maybe be a little more careful making turns.”

[New Hire] continues into the back room with the pallet as [Long-Timer] storms up to me.

Long-Timer: “What the f*** is your problem, [My Name]?”

Me: “I should ask you the same thing. It’s his first day.”

Long-Timer: “And he f***ed up! He worked, he f***ed up, and he should be f****** off out of here!”

Me: “That makes absolutely no f****** sense. Get back to work and leave [New Hire] alone.”

[Long-Timer] refuses to leave [New Hire] alone, yelling at him every time he makes even the most irrelevant and inconsequential mistakes. I am constantly having to intervene and get him to leave [New Hire] alone, pointing out that such minor things as “not dragging the product to the front as soon as you’re done” are not things that need to be punished.

At the end of the shift, I inform [Long-Timer] that he needs to cease his hostility or HE is going to be fired.

Long-Timer: “What the f***?! You should be firing [New Hire]! He’s the one who keeps f****** up!”

Me: “What, you think that because he makes a bunch of minor mistakes that he can learn from, he shouldn’t be allowed to keep working here?”

Long-Timer: Yes! He tried, he f***ed up, and he needs to f*** off!”

Me: “F*** that. I don’t know where you got that attitude, but you need to stop it. Leave him alone, or you’re fired.”

Long-Timer: “F*** you, [My Name]! I’m not letting that f***-up continue!”

Me: “Then you’re fired. Don’t come back tomorrow.”

It has been seven years, and [New Hire] is still here, no longer makes even those minor mistakes, and is one of my best workers. I still have no idea what [Long-Timer] was smoking.

The Problem Is Closer Than You Think

, , , , , , | Right | April 2, 2024

I’ve been a store manager at this store for a year. It’s a small town. I was a cashier at this store for four years during university before being promoted/hired as the store manager, so I know a lot of the faces and what they’re like. One customer has always been rude to employees, especially if they “don’t seem to know what they’re doing”.

One day, I get called over the radio to come to cash for a customer complaint. The cashier who called is still in her training phase. There are only four cashes in the store, so the other cashiers are close by if she needs help.

As I’m walking up, I notice that it’s the customer I previously mentioned, and he already looks quite unimpressed. He’s purchasing an item that requires a special ID. He has done this plenty of times as he is the one in town who does the training for this special ID, and we are one of only two businesses that sell this product. Both the employee who gets the item out of the locked showcase and the cashier check the ID.

Me: “Good afternoon. Someone needed a manager?” 

Customer: “Yes, all your employees are useless. She didn’t know I needed my ID checked again and had to ask another cashier how to do that.”

Me: “Ah, yes, I’m sorry to hear that. She is still training and asks a more senior cashier if she isn’t sure.”

Customer: “Why do you always have new people training? Why can’t I ever get someone who knows what they’re doing?”

Me: “Well, it’s hard to find people who are willing to deal with customers like you who stress them out so much over something so trivial. Most don’t last after learning that you aren’t going away.”

When I became a store manager, I made sure that my staff wasn’t treated the same way I was when I was a cashier. At that, I walked away from him while he tried to figure out a response.

He demanded the senior cashier give him the number for corporate. Corporate called me a few hours later asking for my side of the story. Once they got it all, they asked me if I wanted to ban the customer. I told them to scare him a bit by saying I had the ability to, but I’m not that heartless since there aren’t many choices in our small town. The next time he came in, he was much more appreciative of the staff.