Email Failed To Get A Job

, , , , | Working | August 15, 2017

(I call a possible employee with a job offer. She had listed her cell phone as the best means for communication. I call her three times with no answer and I send her two emails. I do just about everything but literally knocking on her home address. After a week of no replies I move on to the next person on my list. Two weeks later the girl who didn’t answer my multiple phone calls and email comes into the store.)

Woman: “Hi, my name is [Woman] and I’m just checking in on my application.”

Me: “Oh, yeah… I tried calling you and emailing you to offer you a job and you never replied.”

Woman: “Oh, wow, really? I’d love a job! This is so unexpected—”

Me: “No, no. I wasn’t offering you a job. I mean, I WAS, but you never replied so I went to the next person on my list. Here’s a tip: if you’re expecting a job offer, check your email and cell phone regularly, especially if you list them on your resume.”

Woman: “Well, I’ve been getting a lot of telemarketing calls so I don’t answer calls anymore.”

Me: “What about email? I emailed you twice.”

Woman: “I’m worried about viruses.”

Me: “Okay. So listen, these are common worries but if you’re this type of person, then don’t list cell phone and email as main ways of communicating with you.”

Woman: “Well, my mom told me I had to. I’d prefer FaceTime-ing or Skype.”

Me: “The only time I’d EVER FaceTime a possible employee for a job is if they live far away, which you don’t!”

Woman: “So… no job, right?”

(No, she didn’t get the job.)

This Is Already Better Than The Movies

, , , | Related | August 15, 2017

(Where I live, large residential transformers are sometimes hidden in fake houses set up by the hydro company. These houses usually have the windows blacked out or no windows at all, no mailbox, and sometimes no visible street address or driveway, but otherwise look like normal houses. I first time I notice one is when I’m seven years old and point it out to my mother.)

Me: “Mom, that house looks weird!”

Mom: “That’s not actually a house.”

Me: “What do you mean? It looks like one.”

Mom: “That’s a power building. There’s a transformer in there.”

(Not knowing that she was referring to electrical transformers and not giant robots, I walked over to the house the next day and tried to visit the Transformer. No one answered the door so I tried to open it myself but it was locked.)

Me: “Mom, he wasn’t there. I didn’t hear anything and the door’s locked.”

Mom: “Were you at [Friend]’s house?”

Me: “No, I wanted to meet the Transformer but he wasn’t home.”

(My mom went into a panic and told me what was actually in the house and that I shouldn’t try to go in there again.)

Unfiltered Story #91481

, , | Unfiltered | August 15, 2017

(I work at a pizza place as an expediter for take out. We have a little intercom that carries messages across the kitchen to tell the wing guys what we need. They are usually barked at all night, we just ask them if they want a drink and thank them when they bring orders to us.)

Me: *into the intercom to the wing guys* “Hey wings, how’s it coming? Need a drink?

Intercom: “We’ll have ten boxes of wings up there soon for you, we’re fine back here and have water, but does [my coworker on the eat in side] need anything?”

Me: “I’ll ask.” *passes the mic over to my Coworker*

Coworker: *takes the mic, recites the McDonalds Rap and puts the mic down, and goes back to what he was doing as if nothing happened*

Me: *into Intercom* “…I think he’s fine.”

Your Ink Or Your Life

, , , , | Right | August 11, 2017

(There are usually a few days every winter where most stores in our mall close early due to bad winter weather. On this day, we close the store at three pm as the blowing snow has already caused many accidents, which then closes many main roads out of and into town. We close before it gets dark for the safety of our staff who would otherwise have to drive home or into work in the dark. Many other stores in the mall also close at three pm or even earlier that day. We have a sign on the door apologizing about being closed, and I have just let out the last customer and locked the doors, when a lady comes and yells at me through the doors.)

Customer: “WHAT?! ARE YOU SERIOUS?!”

Me: “Yes, sorry, we closed 10 minutes ago because of the weather.”

Customer: “ARE YOU SERIOUS?! I NEED INK!”

Me: “I’m sorry.”

Customer: “ALL I NEED IS INK! JUST LET ME GET MY INK!”

Me: “We’ve already taken all the tills off. I’m sorry.”

Customer: “THIS IS RIDICULOUS! CLOSING BECAUSE OF THE WEATHER! I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS!”

(She storms off, swearing.)

Me: *to myself* “It’s snowing so bad out you can’t even see across the road, but yes, it’s ridiculous not to expect people to drive in that for a minimum wage job. Sure.”

(My manager who lived out of town didn’t even drive home that night; she stayed in a hotel across the street.)

They Can Help With Harassment Insurance

, , , , , , | Working | August 10, 2017

(I’ve been getting calls almost daily from an insurance company — although I am sceptical that it is one — and I’ve politely turned them down every time. This has been going on for about two weeks, with phone calls and flyers, and I finally have enough over the last two days.)

Day #1:

Rep #1: *goes into sales pitch*

Me: “Hold on a moment, I can’t hear you over my TV.”

Rep #1: “Oh, what are you watching, darling, The Kardaaaashians?”

Me: “Why, no, a History of Cannibalism– Hey, he hung up!”

Day #2:

(I call their listed number after getting three calls in 15 minutes, and the rep starts into the sales pitch.)

Me: “Hold it! I want to speak to a supervisor.”

Rep #2: “Ma’am, I can help you with all your insurance needs.”

Me: “Oh, not with this one. Supervisor, now.”

Supervisor: “What seems to be the problem, ma’am?”

Me: “Is your company aware what ‘harassment’ is?”

Supervisor: “Ma’am?”

Me: “I have been getting calls daily for two weeks from you guys, sometimes up to three times a day. When I don’t answer at work, I get called five minutes apart! I was insulted by your rep yesterday, and one called me ‘Mrs’, when my information clearly says ‘Miss.’ Minor, but to me that says you do not have proper authorization to my information, and are a scam. So, are these phone calls and flyers stopping, or do I need to go to the police for harassment?”

Supervisor: “Ma’am, we just want you to have the proper insurance in the case of an accident!”

Me: “Great, but I am rather old fashioned and do not conduct such business over the telephone with a cold caller! I have turned down every single call, I have not returned one flyer, and I do not like getting three calls in 15 minutes while I am at work! So, will the calls and flyers stop, or do I need to go to the police?”

Supervisor: “We’ll remove you from our list, ma’am. Have a nice day!”

(Rude of me, maybe. I get that they’re just doing a job. But enough was enough!)

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