Save Tolstoy For When They’re Eight

, , , | Right | July 2, 2021

I’m having a yard sale to get rid of all of my old junk. An elderly lady checks out my things and picks up a book.

Lady: “How much for this?”

Me: “$5.”

Lady: “That’s way too much for a book! Can’t you do with 75¢?”

Me: *Surprised* “No, ma’am. That book is brand new, and I can’t give it for 75¢. $5 is the lowest.”

Lady: *Upset* “But it’s for my grandson’s birthday! He’s turning seven and I’m in tight with money right now. Can’t you just give it to me for lower?”

I know she’s lying, because there is no way a seven-year-old could read a book that thick and complicated.

Me: “Ma’am, I keep telling you, it’s $5, no lower. I’m sorry I can’t do lower even though it’s for your grandson.”

She attempted to throw some stuff off my tables and yelled rude things at me. She stomped off, nothing in hand, sassy-like, got in her car, and drove away angrily.

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If You Wouldn’t Do It In A Department Store, Don’t Try It In A Yard Sale

, , , | Right | June 30, 2021

I’m having a yard sale to get rid of all of my old junk. A customer arrives at 7:20 am, even though it clearly states in my poster that the sale begins at eight.

Lady: “You’re open, right?”

Me: *Still putting up all the things* “No, the sale starts at eight.”

Lady: “There’s like five minutes until eight. Can’t I have a look a bit early?”

Me: “You can’t look around, but you could wait until eight.”

Lady: *Annoyed* “I don’t have time! I need to look right now! Open!

Me: “The sale doesn’t start until eight, so just wait for thirty minutes. You can’t look early.”

Lady: “Then I’m not buying anything! I ain’t giving my money to all of your junk!” 

The lady walked off, muttering stuff like, “Rude,” and, “No respect for the elderly!”

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Technology Makes Everything Easier!

, , , , , | Working | June 30, 2021

I go to a fast food chain location I’m not familiar with to wait to meet somebody. There’s a small queue but I see self-ordering machines. I’ve never seen one before, so I go to have a look. All I want is a coffee.

I go through the ordering process, and when it’s time for payment information, I have the choice of credit, debit, or cash. Again, it’s only for a coffee, and I have loose change in my pocket, so I select cash.

The receipt prints out, and as I turn around, I see my order number appearing on the screen.

Then I wait… and wait… and notice that other order numbers, higher than mine, are going over. Mine doesn’t move down. I get in line and wait, and when I finally reach the cashier, I hand her my receipt.

Me: “Silly, but my order isn’t coming down. Is there a problem with the self-ordering machines?”

Cashier: “No, sir. Since you select cash, you have to pay before we make it. All you have to do is take your place in the queue and we’ll make it after you pay.”

Me: “Oh… then what’s the use of the cash option on the self-ordering terminals if we have to make the queue and then wait for our order to be made anyway?”

Cashier: *Blinks a few times* “I… I don’t know, sir. They’ve just been installed. That’s what we were told to do.”

I don’t know if that was really the rule sent by corporate or something misunderstood by the employees and manager, but I’ve never used the self-ordering machines for a cash order since.

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Boiling Over An Ice Cap

, , , , | Right | June 29, 2021

I work drive-thru for a popular coffee chain in Canada over the summer nights. There are only three of us. A lady orders a coffee, black, with five caramel shots. I make it and hand it to her.

Customer: “No, I wanted an iced coffee with caramel.”

I make it the same way as I have many times before. I get to the window, charge her the difference, and then hand it to her.

Customer: “Are you f****** kidding me? I wanted an iced coffee with caramel shots!”

Me: “This is an iced coffee.”

Customer: “No, it isn’t. I wanted an iced coffee.”

I stop and think. I’ve worked there a little over a month and made it many times; I think I know what it is. I think logically, and then ask:

Me: “Did you mean an icecap?”

Customer: “No! Iced coffee.”

Me: “Did you mean a regular coffee with ice in it?”

Customer: “F***, just give me an ice cap.”

Me: “I can’t, not without the upcharge.”

She then tried to chuck her Thermos at me. I slammed the window shut and ignored her. My coworkers said not to worry about it and that all the confusion was on her side. Later that week, she was named for pulling the same stunt and actually hitting a worker, covering them in hot coffee.

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Too Bad “Sanitize” Doesn’t Mean “Make More Sane”

, , , , , , , | Working | June 28, 2021

My husband and I decide to do a bit of shopping at our small-town grocery store. As we go to check out our overflowing basket of groceries, there is one lady with a very full cart in front checking out. 

The checkouts at this chain have a small belt that the cashier uses to check out your groceries, and then it splits into two longer belts so that two customers can bag up their groceries at the same time, making the lines go faster. 

As the lady ahead of us finishes paying and goes to the end of the conveyer to bag off her items, my husband and I step forward. He places the very heavy basket on top of the return baskets and starts putting up a few of the items onto the belt.

Cashier: “SIR! I’M GOING TO HAVE TO ASK YOU TO PLACE YOUR ITEMS BACK IN YOUR BASKET UNTIL I HAVE SANITIZED MY STATION!”

My husband and I jump, alarmed by her yelling at the top of her lungs instead of just telling us. We apologize and collect our two things back into our basket and wait as she sprays down her tiny conveyor belt and PIN pad with sanitizer.

Cashier: “Okay! You can now place your items.”

We set up all our groceries on the belt, and as we finish emptying our basket, we shuffle down the line to pay. Now my husband is in front of the PIN pad, but I am the one paying and he is a rather large man.

Husband: *Chuckling* “Whoops, sorry, babe. I’ll just—”

He takes a single step to the side so I can reach the PIN pad to pay, but suddenly, the cashier takes a sharp intake of breath and belts out:

Cashier: “SIR! YOU MUST WAIT FOR THE PREVIOUS CUSTOMER TO FINISH BAGGING HER GROCERIES! THERE IS A HEALTH CRISIS GOING ON AND WE HAVE TO RESPECT OTHERS!!!”

Husband: *Now flustered* “I w-was just making room for my wife to pay!”

Me: “Sorry about that!” 

I hurriedly pull out my card and finish up paying.

Cashier: “Hmph!”

Since this cashier was shouting this out, the poor woman who is at the end bagging up her things is obviously embarrassed and starts just throwing her food into her bags to try to finish up quicker, until she picks up a can and looks perplexed.

It is then that the woman, my husband, and I look down and see that the cashier has tossed our stuff literally on top of this poor woman’s remaining groceries rather than use the second split belt. So, as my husband and I awkwardly stay put and look on, the woman has to pick through OUR groceries to find her own! Now, with all her things bagged up, she is beet red in the face.

Woman: *Mumbles* “I’m so sorry for touching your groceries!”

And she books it out of the store.

Husband: “So, what was all the shouting about making sure you sanitize?! Aren’t you going to clean this belt, as well? You just threw our groceries on top of a complete stranger’s and she had to go through all our stuff!”

Cashier: “Sir, I am just doing what I’m trained to do!”

Husband: “Well, you were trained poorly the—”

Me: *Elbowing him lightly* “[Husband]! Shut up! I just want to get out of here!”

Cashier: “SIR, IS THIS GOING TO BE A PROBLEM WITH ME FOLLOWING PROTOCOL?!”

Other customers started staring over at us as this lady was yelling her head off, making it seem like we were a couple of idiots arguing with her over masks or such, so we threw our stuff together and got out of there!

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