(I’m at a large warehouse store shopping with my husband and two daughters. My three-year-old daughter sees a gigantic box of graham crackers.)
Daughter: *starts pointing from cart* “I want those! I want graham crackers.”
Me: “No. Those are only for Gram Gram’s house. That’s why they are called ‘Gram’ crackers.”
Random Guy Shopping: *chuckles*
(I’m watching a children’s animated film with my mum. There is a bit where our heroes are trying to get back to their kingdom and the boy resorts to pretend-crying at the wizard so he will help them.)
Boy Character: *unintelligible crying*
Mum: “What did he say?”
Me: “‘Wahwuhsob.'”
Mum: “Ah, I thought so.”
(While working at a popular book and music retailer, I meet a customer who is looking for a particular Christmas CD.)
Customer: “Do you have the latest Manchester Stovepipe CD?”
Me: “Manchester Stovepipe?”
Customer: “Yeah, they’re like a modern orchestral group.”
Me: “Do you mean Mannheim Steamroller?”
Customer: “Yeah! That’s it… but how’d you figure out Mannheim Steamroller from Manchester Stovepipe?”
Me: “I want to know how you got to Manchester Stovepipe from Mannheim Steamroller!”
Customer: “Good question.”
Me: “Right this way.”
Administrator: “It was just wonderful! The French class was singing Feliz Navidad in French!”
(I am a fan of a couple of Korean girl groups, BLACKPINK and Red Velvet. I am in my room listening to a song by the former while doing homework, when my younger brother enters and flops on the floor.)
Brother: “I’m booorrrrred. What are you listening to?”
Me: “BLACKPINK.”
Brother: “What song?”
Me: “Whistle.”
Brother: “Play it for me.”
(Because I know it’ll shut him up and make him leave, I restart the song and play it out loud. The start of the song goes, “Make ‘em whistle like a missile, bomb, bomb.” My brother laughs originally, but then when they start singing in Korean he looks confused.)
Brother: “What language is that?”
Me: “Korean. They’re a Korean group.”
Brother: “Korean? And they sing about bombs?!”
Me: “The song is actually a complex story about two people, and this girl is trying desperately to start a relationship with the other person. She encourages them to call out to her, to communicate, but the idea of whistling is also supposed to convey a heartbeat. The girl doesn’t want this person to go, and is expressing a desire for a lasting relationship.”
Brother: “…”
(He then listened to the rest of the song and left the room.)
