Right Working Romantic Related Learning Friendly Healthy Legal Inspirational Unfiltered

Little Nuggets Of Interest

, , , , , , | Right | December 21, 2010

(I am providing a tour through Ireland and explaining its history.)

Me: “…and then the Danish Vikings and the Norse Vikings got together and created the most fantastic thing in the world. Does anyone know what that is?”

Young Passenger: “Chicken nuggets!”

Me: “I was going to say red hair, but that answer just blows mine out of the water!”


This story is part of the Adorable Kids roundup!

Read the next Adorable Kids roundup story!

Read the Adorable Kids roundup!

When You’re This Stupid You Have Nothing Toulouse

, , , , , | Right | March 17, 2010

Customer: “I need to change my currency before I get on the train to Paris.”

Me: “Okay, sir. There is a Bureau De Change just over there where you can purchase your Euros.”

Customer: “What? I already have Euros. I need to get some Francs.”

Me: “Sir, they only accept Euros in France now. You will not need Francs.”

Customer: “Okay, whatever. Next question: how do I get to France from Paris?”

It’s Not Just The Message That Never Dies

, , , , , , | Right | March 14, 2010

(I give tours for prospective students and their families at my school. In the school chapel, there is a plaque commemorating when Martin Luther King, Jr., gave a speech there in the 1950s.)

Me: “The chapel has been host to a number of famous speakers, including Martin Luther King, Jr., as you can see here.”

Parent: “Oh, was that before or after he was assassinated?”

Me: “Uh…”

Daughter: “Mom!”


This story is part of the College-Admission-Fails roundup!

Read the next College-Admission-Fails roundup story!

Read the College-Admission-Fails roundup!


This story is part of our Bad-With-History roundup!

Read the next Bad-With-History roundup story!

Read the Bad-With-History roundup!

Double Your Solar, Double Your Fun

, , , , , | Right | June 19, 2009

(I had a job on a boat, taking tourists out to sea so they could take really nice pictures of the midnight sun. One day, one of the tourists came up to me.)

Me: “What do you think of the midnight sun?”

Tourist: “Yeah, it’s really nice, but tell me one thing. On the map of our solar system, where is the midnight sun located?”

Me: “Er… the sun?”

Tourist: “No! I know where the sun is, but where is the midnight sun?”

Me: “The midnight sun and the sun are exactly the same, but when you are as far north as you are now, and since it’s summer, the sun never sets.”

Tourist: “WHAT THE F***?! I’m gonna sue your sorry a** for false advertisement! I didn’t come all the way from the US to watch the sun I have back home! *storms away*

Must Be From Orange County

, | Right | April 15, 2008

Me: “How can I help you today?”

Customer: “What time does the island close?”

Me: “Close? It doesn’t close. It isn’t like Disneyland, sir. People live here.”

Customer: “Don’t lie to me. I’ve been walking around, and those houses are too small for anyone to live in.”

Me: “Sir, I live in one of those houses.”

Customer’s Wife: “No, honey, she can’t break character.” *winks at me* “I get it.”

Customer: “But really, when do you close?”

Me: “I’m not ‘in character.’ This is an actual town, with actual people living in it. It doesn’t close.”

Customer’s Wife: “Don’t treat us like we’re children. Just tell us when.”

Me: *sigh* “Five o’clock, ma’am. Have a nice day.”