Unfiltered Story #209638

, , , | Unfiltered | September 23, 2020

(I work at a themed attraction, selling photo products. They’re not cheap, but not overly expensive: especially if you buy one of the bundles. This conversation centres around one of our most popular bundles. Two big prints, a keyring, a magnet, two tiny (smaller than credit card sized) prints and digital copies. The customer is a tall man, with a much smaller wife and a child sat nearby. He is being served by a new girl, who hasn’t memorised all the variations of price, size and discount yet so occasionally will grab me for clarification. She grabs me, alarmed and I finish with my customer before moving onto hers.)
Customer- (shouting) no, you’ve got to give me six items, and I want a magnet with that!
(He’s kind of right, the package is ‘six items’ and you CAN swap certain ones for others of the same size and price, but I’m guessing he’s shouting for a reason).
Me- sir, in this package you get (I recite the items on the price board) or you can swap for (second combination). We can also offer you (third combination).
Colleague- (whispers) I said that…
Customer- no, you’re going to give me two keyrings (from combination two) AND a magnet.
Me- we can’t do that. You’re getting two big prints, two keyrings, two small prints and your digital downloads…
(I can see he’s not happy with that. Other customers are starting to get nervous and he’s scaring them off.)
Me- so we can offer you the extra item for (discounted price) instead of (origional price)…
Customer- no, i get six items, I want two big prints, two keyrings and a magnet. I don’t want the small prints.
Me- well, they’re in the package as a free extra. You’re paying for the big prints and the keyrings or magnets. If you don’t want them, maybe you have a relative who might like them?
Customer- but you’re already printing them, can’t you give me a magnet to put them in?
Me- yes. For (discounted price)
Customer- but you’re just going to throw them in the bin!
(By this point I have literally no idea what he thinks is going on. Even if customers leave photographs, we make every attempt to keep and return them. If HE wants to throw the unwanted small prints in the bin, that’s his business).
Me- There’s no need to shout at us, sir. Here is the price board. If you don’t want that package, you can buy the items at separate prices for (bigger price). So you see, you might as well get the package even if you don’t use the small prints.
Customer- but you should give me a magnet for inconveniencing me!
(My colleague is virtually silent. I’m half hoping she goes for the manager who is on a break because, although he can’t authorise any ridiculous discounts or free items, he is at least as tall as the big guy yelling and making angry gestures)
Me- these are our prices. This is what we can offer you. Like I said, we can give you the extra magnet for (discounted price) and you could maybe give the other small print to your son’s grandparents…
Customer- I am not paying these prices! I want six items! I should get six items.
Me- the extra magnet would be seven and you’re not paying for it in the package.
(At this point he storms off, his wife appologising to us and other customers in his wake. I congratulate my newbie colleague for dealing with it so well and we go on serving other customers who are starting to come back to our desk. Maybe ten minutes later, his wife creeps back in with the money in hand.)
Customer’s wife- we’ll take the package as advertised for that price. I’ll give the spare photos to our mothers.
(She spends the entire transaction appologising and saying lovely things about how well we dealt with the situation.She then scurries off again.)
Me- You know, she was so nice I nearly wanted to give her a free magnet for dealing with him?

Unfiltered Story #207140

, | Unfiltered | September 4, 2020

(I used to work for a very well known cathedral which is also a popular visitor attraction and charges an entry fee for sightseeing to help pay for maintenance costs. This exchange happened shortly after the recently discovered skeleton of King Richard III was reburied in 2015. For whatever reason, after 500 years Richard III still has many supporters dedicated to clearing his bad reputation; they also seem to be constantly roaming the country visiting places connected to him, looking for people who disagree with them so they can start arguments and be generally obnoxious. I am selling tickets when this happens:)

Customer: Are there any famous people buried in here? Like kings, and suchlike?
Me: [lists names of notable people buried at the cathedral. They are only famous if you’re local and/or an English history buff.]
Customer: *blinks and looks confused* no I mean real famous people, like Richard III. You wanted him, didn’t you? But [other cathedral city] got him! I’m a Plantagenet, so I know these things! [=he is a descendant of RIII’s family]
Me: Well you know, there is plenty to see in this city even without Richard III.
Customer: I’m a Plantagenet, you know!
Me: Ah, you should really go to [nearby site closely connected to RIII] if you haven’t been already!
Customer: *looks at me like I’ve slapped him in the face, clearly has no idea what I’m talking about* I’m a Plantagenet, you know! I’m related to him!
Me: Yes sir, I know what a Plantagenet is.

(I clearly do not look impressed enough for his liking. At this point his wife, who during the conversation had been buying tickets from me like a normal human being, picks up their tickets and turns to him:)

Customer’s wife [hissing loudly]: SHUT UP!
Customer: But…
Customer’s wife [hissing]: YOU NEED TO SHUT UP!

(She then proceeded to drag him into the cathedral, him protesting about being a Plantagenet while she repeatedly told him that he needed to learn how to shut up.)

A Customer That Drives You Round The Bends

, , , , | Right | August 27, 2020

I have just finished booking an overseas tourist who is a certified diver into one of our day dive trips. This particular trip is an all-day trip, with a good three hours of diving throughout the trip, with small surface interval times — breaks — on the boat as it moves between sites. This particular customer, a much older gentleman, just walks in and, already knowing exactly what he wants, announces that he wants to book this trip for the day after tomorrow.

Me: “All good to go! Here is your booking voucher; simply present it to the crew upon boarding and they’ll take care of you from there. Hope you have a great time out there!”

Customer: “Great! Just one last question: what time does the boat get back? It’s just that our flight leaves at [time roughly two hours after the boat returns].”

Me: “Certainly! As mentioned, it is an all-day trip so the boat will be returning at roughly five pm… Wait.” *Alarms bells ringing* “Sorry, did you say that your flight leaves that night?”

Customer: “Yeah! Five pm, hey? Oh, I didn’t realise it got in so late. Do you think we’ll make it to the airport?”

Now, our nearest airport is roughly an hour away, so while I do think the customer will be pushing it to make it to his flight, that’s not why I suddenly went quiet. You see, regardless of which SCUBA organisation you are with or which dive company you book with, they all say that, for medical reasons, you are not supposed to fly within twenty-four hours of your last dive. This customer’s flight is due to leave only two hours after the boat so he is certainly within the twenty-four-hour exclusion period for flying after diving. As a certified diver, he should definitely be aware of this rule.

Me: “Well, sir… I’m sorry, but you can’t dive on [Day].”

Customer: *Taken aback* “What?! Why? Is it because we won’t make our flight?”

Me: “Well, no. Unfortunately, you need to wait twenty-four hours after diving before flying. Knowing now that you are flying after your dives, I’m going to have to cancel your trip. I can’t allow you to dive when you are flying out so soon. I will, of course, refund your trip right now, or if you are available, move you to tomorrow?”

Customer: *Getting visibly angry* “What?! I can’t do tomorrow; I have another trip booked! I don’t want a refund, either; I want to dive! Why can’t I dive?!”

Me: “It’s a health issue, sir. Flying so soon after diving leaves you susceptible to decompression sickness, or the bends.”

Customer: *Sarcastic tone* “Oh, really? Well, missy, I’ve been diving since before you were even thought of. Since when did this become a thing?”

I am not putting up with the sudden rudeness.

Me: “Since we realised the debilitating effects, both short-term and long-term, of decompression sickness, sir, usually resulting in a painful death. Now, you have two choices: either move to tomorrow where you will be outside the twenty-four-hour exclusion zone, or if that’s not possible, I will certainly refund you.”

The customer is now getting supremely irate.

Customer: “This is ridiculous! Back in my day, we didn’t even have this sort of regulation! I came all the way from [Country] to see [Dive Destination] and I demand to see it!”

I am initially stunned, but then I compose myself.

Me: “Certainly, sir, I understand that coming all this way only to be told no would be incredibly frustrating. But right now, you have only one choice: leave, make up your mind, and come back when you have calmed down. If I don’t see you by [closing time], I’m simply going to take your name off the booking, no refund.”

The customer storms out of the shop, seething. I just shake my head and return to my work. It is nearly closing when the same customer comes walking back in, a smug smile on his face.

Me: “Good to see you again, sir. Did you decide what you would like to do?”

Customer: *Smugly* “I want the refund.”

Me: “Of course.”

As I’m processing his refund, he asks me this:

Customer: “If I didn’t tell you about my flight, would we be doing this right now?”

Me: “Well, no, but at the same time it’s good you did tell me. It’s not a good idea to keep things like that hid—”

Customer: *Cutting me off* “That’s all I needed to know.”

I finish processing the refund. I hand him back his receipt.

Me: “All sorted, sir. Once again, I am sorry that you couldn’t go out—”

Customer: *Cuts me off again* “I just want you to know as soon as I left I booked with another company for that day. They were very happy to serve me. I look forward to giving them amazing reviews while you get one-star.”

I do not care about reviews, but I am more shocked that he was allowed to go diving even after his flight times make it dangerous.

Me: “Really? They booked you on even with your flight leaving so soon afterward?!”

Customer: “That’s the thing! I didn’t tell them! I’m going to have a great time, and I’m going to personally email you the bad review I leave!”

And he proudly strolled out of the store. I was amazed, and I wish I had found out which company he ended up with so I could’ve called them myself to warn them. I really hope he missed his flight, and if he didn’t, that he didn’t suffer ill effects.

We get that he spent a lot of money coming here, and that this particular area is a dream destination for a lot of people. But it is NEVER worth your health! Still waiting for that bad review, by the way.

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The Education That Time Forgot, Part 2

, , , , , | Right | August 24, 2020

I work at a state park where we have some rather large grindstones/kettlestones set up around our visitor center. I get this question almost every day from seventy-year-old elderly folks, to forty-year-old parents, to five-year-old children, even though we have giant posters explaining that they are very round rocks that helped carve out our potholes/kettleholes years ago.

Customer: “Is that a dinosaur egg?”

Me: “What? Uh… no. No, it’s not.”

The Education That Time Forgot

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Unfiltered Story #205599

, , , | Unfiltered | August 13, 2020

I was working at a tourist attraction as a photographer. Regularly you would have people come up to you and ask you to take pictures of them on their phones which we politely declined as our policy was only to take pictures with the company camera during work. One night I was working a silent disco where the room is completely quiet and guests wear headphones with loud music playing in them- You get people accidentally yelling in a silent room’ forgetting the music is only in their ears.

Guy- Hi, can you take a picture of me and my friends (holds out phone)

Me- Sorry but I’m not allowed as I’m the official photographer. I can take a picture of you with my camera though, they come out a lot better and you don’t have to buy anything, don’t worry.

Guy- No I want it on my phone

Me- Okay, I’m afraid I really can’t take it but that gentleman over there can. (points to guest assistant standing 20 feet away).

Guy- (Gives me a scathing look, puts his headphones back on and walks over to his friend group 5 foot away and shouts at the top of his lungs)- ‘SHE WOULDN’T TAKE A PICTURE OF ME, WHAT A C**T.’

Everyone not wearing headphones turns to stare, he just struts off.