It’s getting close to closing time at the visitor center. A family of four walks in. I do my usual cheery greeting.

Me: “Just to let you know, we’re closing in only three minutes.”

There’s not a single acknowledgment from the family. Our visitor center isn’t very large, and I am only about ten feet from them, so I know they’ve heard me. I watch them for those three minutes and notice they are speaking English, so it doesn’t seem to be a language barrier.

At closing time, I announce to everyone that we are now closed but will reopen at 8:00 am. Everyone thanks me and leaves except for the family of four. Once again, they do not acknowledge me at all. I just go about my closing procedures: closing the blinds, locking doors, turning off the park film, and partially shutting the gate for the gift shop.

I then remind them again that we’re closed.

Again, no acknowledgment.

Finally, ten minutes past close, the kids come up with cash to buy things.

Me: “I’ve already closed down the register and I can no longer accept cash, but I can do a credit card transaction.”

They put the stuff down and went to tell their parents what I said. The family finally left, the mother yelling at me the entire way out telling me how rude I was. I just laughed and shook my head in disbelief.

Related:
Not So Closed Minded, Part 33
Not So Closed Minded, Part 32
Not So Closed Minded, Part 31
Not So Closed Minded, Part 30
Not So Closed Minded, Part 29

I meet this guy on a dating site. He seems smart and nice enough, so I agree to go for a walk in the park with him then get dinner after and discuss what we’re both looking for.

It goes wrong almost right away. He sees me, and the first thing he does is hug me. I’m immediately skeeved out, but I laugh awkwardly and step away. We start walking around. He’s super vague about what he does for a living, he doesn’t talk about himself much, and the small talk is super awkward.

Eventually, he starts venturing into some really adult topics. I’m uncomfortable since there are families walking around the park — a lot of kids with their parents — and I’m starting to freak out. He then goes on to say something along these lines.

Guy: “Yeah, my ex said he never wanted to hear from me again, but I had already bought his Christmas presents so I just sent them to his house anyway. He just sent them back. Such a shame; I tried to be nice.”

This man just told me his ex said he never wanted to hear from him again. Then he told me he reached out anyway, breaking a clear boundary. What other boundaries is this guy okay with breaking?

I subtly text my brother asking him to call and say there’s been an emergency. I quickly dip out once I can.

Later, I see that this guy has posted on the dating site.

Guy: “Well, that didn’t go well…”

Guy: “[An interest that I mentioned] is so weird!”

And now he continues to reach out every once in a while, forgetting who I am and how hard he struck out.

I occasionally volunteer for a charity that helps provide medical care to children in need. It’s late October, and there is a community event happening in the park, so we’ve set up a table to both share what we do and collect donations which I’m manning. Given the nature of the event, we are not the only charity to have set up a table.

A young boy comes up to our table. He appears to be alone, but given how many people are milling about, I just presume one of them is his parent and is keeping an eye on him.

Boy: “Are you a charity, too?”

Me: “Yes, we are. We’re [Charity].”

Boy: “What do you do?”

I give him the usual spiel and answer a few fairly standard questions he asks. After I answer his last questions, he seems to stop to think very hard for a few seconds before apparently coming to a decision.

Boy: “You seem pretty good; I’ll think about it. Thanks for talking to me.”

With that, he runs off before I can respond. I found the whole conversation a little bemusing, though the boy’s very intent expression and questions were cute. I mostly forget about it until a little while later when the boy shows back up with two women and an even younger girl in tow.

Boy: “This is the one.”

Girl: “Hi! You help sick kids?”

This girl is young enough that I decide to simplify my usual explanations a bit.

Me: “Yes, we do. We help to pay for them to go to a doctor and for the doctor to do whatever is needed for them.”

Girl: “And you make them better?”

We’re not supposed to promise that our charity will save everyone since, sadly, even with the best treatment, some children don’t pull through. So, I hedge just a bit here.

Me: “We do the best we can to make the kids we help get better. And we’ve managed to save many kids and help others who were too sick to do things get healthy enough to go back to their normal lives.”

Girl: “Do you get to meet the kids?”

Along with the other material at the table, we have some photos of children we’ve helped along with descriptions of what our charity did for them. I intentionally pick a picture of a girl around the same age as the one I’m speaking to and show it to the family as I’m talking.

Me: “No, I don’t get to; I’m busy helping in other ways. But they tell us about some of the kids. You see this little girl here? Her heart didn’t work right and it was making her very sick, but we found someone who could help fix it. Now she’s healthy and getting to go to school and play with her friends.”

Girl: “Awww. I want to help! Mom, can I pick this one?”

Mom: “Sure, you can; it’s your choice. But you have a month before you have to pick. We could wait to see if there are any charities you like better, and if you don’t find one, we can send the money to these folks closer to Christmas.”

Girl: “No, I want to help them now!”

Mom: “Okay, honey. Well then, why don’t you ask the nice man if they’re accepting cash donations here?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, we are.”

Girl: “Can I give it to him?”

[Mom] pulls out a wallet and hands a twenty-dollar bill to the girl. The girl in turn hands it over to me beaming with excitement.

Girl: “Here you go. For sick girls.”

Me: “Oh, wow! That’s a lot of money. Thank you so much! We’ll make sure we use this to help other kids. It sure is very kind of you to help other kids like that. Your mom must be very proud of you.”

Mom: “Oh, I’ve always been very proud of both kids here.” *To the girl* “And honey, I think you made a good choice. Your Mama and I give some money to this charity every year, also.”

Me: “Oh! Thank you for your contributions, as well, then.”

Mom: “Oh, it’s no problem. We try to give back to a few charities at the end of the year. Mostly we donate it all online, but we’re letting each of the kids pick a charity of their own to donate some money to this year — you know, to help them see how charity works and get more involved.”

Me: “Oh, that’s a wonderful idea!”

There were a few more pleasantries I won’t bore you with before they ended up leaving my table. But what I remember most about the whole encounter was just how excited the little girl was to hand over her twenty to me. Both of the kids were adorable.

CONTENT WARNING: Child Abuse

I was born with cataracts and had surgery as an infant to remove the lenses in my eyes. Both because my eyes have no lenses and from complications from the surgeries I’ve had on my eyes, I have a visual impairment; with glasses, my vision is okay — 20/50 — but without glasses, my eyes are like a camera that can’t focus on anything. My prescription is huge and my glasses make my eyes look enormous.

In school, I have a 504 plan; I sit at the front of the class and always have the option of requesting materials in large font or using a tablet. As a toddler, I had a series of ear infections that left me with moderate hearing loss. I know ASL and I can usually hear well enough with my hearing aids.

My parents divorced when I was young. Even as a little kid, I remember that I preferred my time at my dad’s house to my mom’s.

When I was five, my mother took me to a park. I was having a lot of fun on the playground. My mom wanted to go on a walk and get some food at a food truck that was usually parked on the other side of the park. It’s a small park and walking to the food truck from the playground would take five minutes, but the food truck sounded boring compared to all the fun I was having on the playground.

My mom told me I was being naughty, took off my glasses and hearing aids, put them in her purse, and told me to stay there by myself. I started crying.

A woman and a little boy came up to us and asked if I was okay. There was a communication barrier because I had a hard time hearing them and couldn’t see them, but I was eventually able to tell the woman my dad’s phone number, and he came to pick me up.

My dad came to get me just as my mom showed up with her burrito, which was more important to her than her daughter.

This incident launched another set of custody battles in which my dad won primary custody of me. My mom has visitation rights, but I haven’t seen her in years.

The little boy from the park went to my elementary school, and we ended up being best friends. I was teased a bit because my best friend was a guy, but I didn’t really care. He knew ASL, too. We tended to be in the same classes in elementary school, and when the class got too loud so I couldn’t hear, we would communicate using ASL without anyone knowing.

I’ve been going through a rough time at school recently, and also, my cat died. My dad and best friend have been the best support for me as I go through all of this.

Basically, my best friend gave my dad sole custody of me.

I’m thirty-one so this story is a tad bit old, but it still makes my family laugh to this day. It’s good enough that, despite my memory loss from having had grand mal seizures during the first twelve years of my life, I still remember it like it was yesterday. It takes place on my ninth birthday.

We’re at a public park with my family and friends. We’ve got the cake and candy and pizza and snacks. Don’t forget party favors!

We’re having fun and hanging out and having a blast, and there are these kids slowly eyeing us from the park. Now, mind you, my mom isn’t dumb. She grew up poor, so she knows what it’s like being a kid and watching kids around you get stuff while you get nothing. We give people food and goodie bags. We aren’t a**holes. We share with the public. We can’t give the whole world things, but we share.

Some parents come up with their group of kids not long after we’ve given some skateboarders goodie bags.

Man: “Nice party you have here.”

Dad: “Thanks. How can we help you?”

Woman #1: “It’s my daughter’s birthday today.”

Mom: “Well, happy birthday. Would you like some cake?”

The little girl looks like she simply wants cake, and so do her friends. My sisters and friends are more than willing to welcome them to join us, but this woman and her friends aren’t going to let that happen until they put my mom in her place.

Woman #1: “She won’t be having cake. Not until you understand how disrespectful it is to come to a public park and eat like this in front of others.”

My grandmother gets up.

Grandmother: “Excuse me?”

Woman #2: “Well, my daughter is hungry.”

Sister: “Didn’t we literally just offer cake?”

Woman #1: “That doesn’t matter. You can’t just come here and eat like cretins while my children starve!”

The group of parents mumbles in the background about how we didn’t offer them food or drink.

Mom: “Then bring food. It’s a public park. I’m here having a birthday party for my daughter. I’ve given plenty of food to children already. I can’t be held responsible for the fact that you aren’t trying to feed your children. Look. I offered your starving daughter cake, and you continued to let her starve. So, who’s the disrespectful one now?”

The woman made this face like my mom had just smacked her. Mom handed the little girl some cake, and her mom grabbed her by the arm and stormed off angrily.

The other people kind of hung around and my mom eyed them, telling them that they should either leave or stay. They pretty much apologized and grabbed some cake, and it became a bigger party than expected.

Two years later, the same woman tried doing this to us again over chicken nuggets. Only, when she realized it was us, she panicked and started laughing, literally trying to make it into a joke. My mom just gave her the finger and slowly devoured a nugget as the lady backed away. I swear, she has no life.