That Will Certainly Be An Upgrade!

, , , , , | Right | September 6, 2020

We just had a “Star Wars” day at our library. I’m checking out a father of two girls and talking to the girl nearest.

Me: “Did you have fun today?”

Little Girl: “Yep!”

Me: “Did you learn how to use the Force?”

Little Girl: “Uh-huh.”

Me: “Are you going to be a Jedi Knight when you grow up?”

Little Girl: “Well… first I’m gonna be a snail, and then I’m gonna be a Jedi Knight!”

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Boy, What A Charmer!

, , , , | Right | August 30, 2020

I work at a rather small dry cleaning place. A man comes in to pick up a suit with his young son. Usually, our customers’ children are too shy to talk to us.

Son: “Do you know how old I am?”

Me: *Taken aback* “No! How old are you?”

Son: “I’m four and a half years old.”

Me: “Wow. I’m twenty-one. I’m old!”

Son: *Thinking hard* “Yes.

I continue the transaction with the customer. 

Son: *To his father* “Dad, can I press the green button?”

Customer: “Of course you can!”

The customer puts in his card into the machine, and I go to type in the price, pressing the green button when I do.

Son: “But I wanted to press the green button!”

Me: “Oh, I am so sorry. You can do it now.”

He presses the green button, and two receipts come out, one for the customer and one for me. 

Me: *To the customer* “Would you like your receipt?”

Customer: “Yes, please!”

Son: “Daddy, can I have that piece of paper?”

Customer: “No, sorry, Daddy needs this one.”

Son: *To me* “Can I have that piece of paper?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I need this one. But I can print out another one for you.”

Son: “Yes, please!”

I print out another receipt for the little boy. This one is wider and longer than the one I gave his father. 

Me: “You’re getting a big one!”

I hand him the receipt. 

Son: “Ooooh! That is big!”

The customer thanks me and says goodbye as he leaves. They turn the corner when I hear:

Son: “Bye-bye!”

Me: “Bye!”

The boy comes running into the store again.

Son: “Bye! I’ll—” *starts thinking* “—see you tomorrow?”

Me: “No, you won’t, sweetie.”

Son: “No… I’ll see you some other day, then!”

Me: “Yes, you will! Definitely!”

Son: “See you then! Bye!”

After he left, I couldn’t stop smiling for the rest of the day. That little boy made my entire week!

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A Cute Mis-Steak

, , , , | Right | August 27, 2020

I am about six years old. My family is out at a steakhouse to celebrate my older cousin’s first communion. I have just learned how to read and want to impress my family by not only reading the kids’ menu but ordering all by myself. I decide on the kid’s steak, but since I have never ordered food at a restaurant on my own before, it doesn’t occur to me that beef is cooked and served in different ways.

Waitress: *Turning to me* “And what do you want, sweetie?”

Me: “The kid’s steak, please.”

Waitress: “Okay, how do you want that cooked?”

Me: “Um… hot, please!”

Cue all of my adult relatives and the waitress laughing at the response. It’s been nearly fifteen years since that day, and my family still considers it one of the funniest and cutest moments of my childhood.

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Technically Correct: The Best Kind Of Correct

, , , | Related | August 21, 2020

I take my five-year-old niece to visit my home in Sweden, since my family isn’t from there. The trip has been wonderful, and now I’m with her at the airport so that we can travel back to my home country.

We’re looking out the window at airplanes taking off when I ask my niece a question.

Me: “Where do you think this airplane is headed to?”

Niece: “Africa!”

Me: “Oh, where in Africa do you think it will land?”

Niece: “At another airport!”

I mean, she wasn’t technically wrong.

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A Gentleman In The Making

, , , , , | Right | August 9, 2020

I’m right at the beginning of a six-hour shift on a very busy Saturday. I’ve served a few customers when a woman comes up with her two kids. The eldest is walking but the youngest is standing in the trolley. You can hear him before you see him.

Child: *To me* “This is ours. This is mine and this is mine.”

He continues in this fashion.

Mother: “Shush, she knows.”

Child: *Ignoring her* “Hey, lady, how are you?”

Me: “Good, you?”

Child: “I helped shop; I’m buying things. Mummy, can I go play?”

Mother: “You’re not helping anymore?”

Child: *Thinks about it* “No, I’ll help. I’m a man in the making.”

The mother and I both start laughing. The kid can’t be older than three so he sounds like a mouse.

Child: “Yeah, I’m a man in the making; did you hear that?”

He asked that over and over for the rest of the transaction. It was about the funniest thing I’ve ever had happen at work; I was smiling for the rest of my shift.


This story is part of our feel-good roundup for August 2020!

Read the next feel-good story here!

Read the feel-good August 2020 roundup!

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