The Dark Chocolate Knight

, , | Virginia, USA | Right | October 12, 2017

Throwback Thursdays

THROWBACK THURSDAY! Check out this awesome story that you may have missed! What’s an awesome experience with a child customer you’ve had? Let us know in the comments!

(I work in a coffee shop. I am on break in the lobby when a couple walks in. Directly behind them is a cute little boy in Batman costume.)

Me: “Oh, my God! It’s BATMAN!”

(The boy stops, strikes a pose, and starts looking around menacingly. After a few seconds, he approaches the counter.)

Mother: “Jeff, would you like a chocolate milk?”

Boy: “I am not Jeff. I am The Batman.”

Mother: “The Batman, would you like a chocolate milk?”

Boy: “Yes. Yes, The Batman would.”

(The couple pays while the boy sits down with his chocolate milk. He keeps a stern look on his face as he sips the drink.)

Boy: *sips* “Gotham is safe.”


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The Children Are Late Because Daddy Came Early

, , , , | Learning | October 8, 2017

(A five-year-old girl has arrived late at school. I asked her what happened, since it is quite unusual for her.)

Student: *indignant huff* “WELL! I would have been here on time, but Daddy went up to say goodbye to Mummy. She was having a shower and it took him aaaages! And when he came downstairs he was all wet and had to get changed before we could drive to school!”

Pokémon Gold And Old

, , , , , | Right | October 6, 2017

(I am working in the gaming department. A couple and their young son of about six are looking for a game.)

Me: *to the kid* “What’s your favorite game?”

Kid: “Uh… I dunno.”

Me: “My favorite game is Pokémon.”

Kid: “No, it’s not!”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Kid: *defiantly* “Grown-ups can’t play video games.”

Sudden Growth In Misunderstandings

, , , , , | Related | October 6, 2017

(My husband and I have just gotten a black lab puppy, and have introduced him to my parents, siblings, nieces, and nephews. At the point when this story takes place, it has been two weeks since my family has seen our new puppy, and he has grown quite a bit.)

Dad: “Hey, what happened to [Puppy]? Did you trade him in for a larger model?”

Me: *playing along* “Yeah, we didn’t think having him be that small would be good for the long run. Plus, this one can sleep through the night and go down the stairs by himself.”

(My nieces and nephews, all under age 10, come over to pet the puppy.)

Nephew: “So, what did you name this one?”

Me: “We thought we’d stick with [Puppy] to make it easier to remember.”

Nephew: “Wow! He’s a lot bigger than the other one!”

(A week or two later, my family is sitting on the porch talking.)

Dad: “I think we should tell [Nephew] that you didn’t actually trade [Puppy] in for a bigger one, and that [Puppy] just grows a lot faster than [Nephew].”

They All Want To Be Left Holding The Baby

, , , | Working | September 29, 2017

(One of my closest friends works in a shoe shop with very large windows. Our other close friend has gotten me into the habit of making weird faces, or at least waving at her when she’s working; much to the amusement of her coworkers. My insanely sociable one-year-old also likes to wave at her unofficial auntie, and since she loves shoes and all the attention from the other female staff, it’s better than Christmas for her when we go inside. We have just gotten her her first pair of shoes a few weeks ago this incident, which is when her fan-club starts.)

Me: *to daughter* “Oh, Auntie [Friend]’s working today! Say hiya!”

([Friend] waves at us, then runs out of the shop.)

Friend: “Can I borrow your baby?”

Me: “Sure. Give her back when she’s 18!”

Friend: *going inside* “[New Worker]’s on her last day of training here, and we need to train her on fitting baby shoes.”

(We go in, and my daughter gets lots of attention as her feet are measured and the fit of her shoes are checked again. The trainee does a great job, and we go about our business. A few months later, I go in with my mother while my daughter is at home with her dad and my friend is off work.)

Worker: *as we’re leaving* “Where’s your little helper today?”

Me: “At home with her dad; thank God!”

(They laugh, but I can tell they’re disappointed not to see her, which is cute in itself. A few days later, my friend runs outside after waving again.)

Friend: “Can I take her inside? The girls want to see her!”

Me: *smiling* “Okay, you take her there and I’ll take the buggy.”

Friend: “I’m pretty sure if [Owner]’s watching the cameras, he’s wondering why I just stole a baby!”

(My daughter got lots of attention, got to play with shoes, and got to sit in the tiny chair in the kid’s section. I swear, she could set the place on fire and they’d all adore it!)

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