Waive That Money Goodbye

, , , , | Right | September 25, 2020

I work for a bank call center and if we can waive a late fee for customers who are constantly late, we tell them no. I have a guy threaten me over fifteen bucks.

Caller: “Why can’t you waive my late fee?”

Me: “Because you have been late for months and we waived it last month. We can’t waive it every month.”

Caller: “Do you know who I am? I know the president of your bank and I’m good friends with him. I’ll have him fire you if you don’t waive my late fee!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, I cannot waive this fee.”

Caller: “B****!” *Click*

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You’ll Have To Wait For Old Age To Be Cute Again

, , , , , | Related | September 18, 2020

My dad, sisters, and I are talking about kids. Two of my sisters and I are teenagers while the youngest one is seven.

Dad: “Let me put it this way: your kids are cute and then they become teenagers.”

Youngest Sister: “Daddy, am I cute?”

Dad: “Yes, [Youngest Sister], you’re cute.”

Me: “Daddy, am I cute?”

Dad: “You’re a teenager.”

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Unfiltered Story #208768

, , | Unfiltered | September 18, 2020

(from across the lobby)
Guest: “where do we park?”
Me: “anything on the street with a blue post is $2/hour till 8, and then free util 8 am. Or the lot is $6 for 10 hours or 12 for 24”
Guest: “is there another exit?”
Me: “just the front door”
(walks up to the desk)
Guest: “Okay.. and then the street is how much?”
Me: “$2 an hour. Until 8”
Guest: “and then what? it’s free?”
Me: “and then it’s free- ”
Guest: “till when?”
Me: “till 8 am”
(I pull up the arrivals list)
Guest: “and the lot is 6 for 12- what was it?”
Me: “6 for 10, 12 for 24”
Guest: “Alright. I’ll be right back”

Unfiltered Story #208035

, , | Unfiltered | September 14, 2020

Two teenage girls came into our store, where we mix ice cream together with fruit, candy, etc. on a large slab.
Coworker: “Would you like toasted or untoasted coconut?”
Girl #1: “What’s the difference?”
Coworker: “….. One of them is toasted?”

A Moving Story Of A Stubborn Oma

, , , , , | Related | September 10, 2020

For as long as I can remember, my grandmother has had this, like, fetish with moving furniture. She literally tries to rearrange things every other day. It was mostly fine while she was living alone, although it kind of sucked because pretty much any time we went up to see her, my mom, brothers, and/or myself would have to move something.

Several years ago, she had a stroke. After realizing that she wasn’t as steady as she’d once been, she finally agreed that moving was a good idea, and we got her into an assisted living facility.

She walks with a walker now and has been told by her doctor to literally never let that thing out of her reach. It’s okay to put it to the side so it’s out of the way of her recliner, but she needs to be able to grab it as soon as she gets up.

My grandmother takes that to mean that she can leave it across the room. She also keeps trying to move her furniture because she can “use those pieces to stabilize herself.”

First of all, she’s trying to move things like her bed and bookcases — things she shouldn’t be moving on her own anyway. She’s actually fallen a few times; one time they actually needed to call EMS to come check her out because she’d hit her head and given herself a black eye.

I am on the phone with her a couple of days ago, just checking in.

Oma: “I’m trying to move my chair into the bedroom.”

Me: “You don’t need to move anything!”

Oma: “Well, it’s just that I want the chair near the window so I can look outside and I’m going to move the TV in here so I can talk to people while watching TV.”

Me: “You don’t need to move anything. You can use your walker for a seat, and isn’t your bed near the window?”

Oma: “Well, yeah, but I still want to move it.”

Me: “Move a book. You can shift it from the bookcase to your table near the window. You don’t need to move your recliner.”

Oma: “Well, it would make it easier to see outside.”

Me: “Do I need to call Mom and have her talk to you?”

Oma: “No, I’ve already talked to her. And to [Aunt].”

Me: “And what did they say?”

Oma: “I don’t need to move anything.”

Me: “They’re right; you don’t need to move anything. You’re fine.”

Oma: “Well, I’ve got one of the guys coming tomorrow to help me move my sewing table and that’s the last thing I’m moving.”

I roll my eyes because it’s been “the last time” every time we’ve called her on this.

Me: “Whatever you say.”

Oma: “And my doctor did say that it wouldn’t hurt me to walk from the window to my chair and back.”

Me: “Just as long as you use your walker.”

Oma: “Well, I hear them coming down the hall, so it’s lunchtime. I’ll talk to you later.”

Me: “Enjoy.”

Oma: “Talk to you later!”

Me: “Bye. Love you!”

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