Me: “Thank you for calling. How may I assist you?”
Caller: “I would like a gift card.”
Me: “You would like to purchase a gift card?”
Caller: “No.”
Me: “I’m sorry, I don’t understand. You said you wanted a gift card.”
Caller: “Well, yes. We’ve been shopping at your stores for so many years, we feel we should get a gift card from you.”
This story is part of the Entitled Customers roundup!
Read the next Entitled Customers roundup story!
Read the Entitled Customers roundup!
Me: “Can I help you?”
Child: “I don’t get it.”
Me: “What?”
Child: “Are you old or just simple?”
Me: “Excuse me?”
Child: “Cause my mom said everyone who works at [Supermarket] is either old or simple.”
(The mother came running behind him, picked him up, and ran off.)
Related:
From The Mouth Of Babes
This story is part of our “Kids say embarrassing things” roundup!
Read the next “Kids say embarrassing things” roundup story!
Read the “Kids say embarrassing things” roundup!
(A woman is several places back in line with her son who is about eight years old.)
Customer’s Son: “Mom? I don’t feel good.”
Customer: “Hang on, honey. Mommy is going to get her coffee and then she will take you to the restroom.”
Customer’s Son: “Mom? I feel really sick.”
(I look up and see the boy is very pale and breathing heavy.)
Me: “Ma’am? If you would like to take your son to the restroom, we will save your place in line.”
Customer: “No, it’s okay. We will wait.”
Customer’s Son: “Mom. I really need the bathroom. I don’t feel good.”
Customer: “Honey, just wait. We’ll be done in a few minutes.”
Manager: “Ma’am, please take your son to the restroom. We’ll make your drink while you are in there. On the house. Please!”
Customer: “No! He will have to wait.”
(The customer’s son begins to gag and the customers near him move away from, all of them begging her to take him to the restroom immediately. A few even offer to take him themselves.)
Customer: “I said no! He is just doing this for attention. If you ignore him he will stop.”
Me: “Ma’am, for the last time. Please take your son to the–”
(The customer’s son bends over and begins vomiting on the floor.)
Manager: “Please! Get him out of here!”
Customer: “But I don’t want to lose my place in line.”
Manager: “Ma’am, either get him to the restroom or get him outside. Now!”
Customer: *in a huff* “Well, fine! He’s only doing this for attention!”
(The customer comes out five minutes later leading her fully-recovered son by the hand. As I finish mopping the boy’s breakfast off the floor, she collects her free coffee drink, smiles, and leaves, calling out…)
Customer: “Thank you very much. See you all tomorrow!”
This story is part of our Terrible Parents roundup!
Read the next Terrible Parents story!
Read the Terrible Parents roundup!
Customer: “Yes, I’d like a room for the night.”
Me: “Okay, the rate for tonight is [price].”
Customer: *confused* “You mean it’s not free?”
Me: “No, it’s [price].”
Customer: “Are you sure?”
Me: “Yes.”
Customer: “Not free?”
Me: “No.”
Customer: “Do the people upstairs know about this?”
Me: “Yes. They all paid the same thing.”
Customer: *walking away* “Crazy people.”
This story is part of our Weird Hotel Guests roundup!
Read the next Weird Hotel Guests roundup story!
Read the Weird Hotel Guests roundup!
Customer: “Are you in charge of the salad bar?”
Me: “Of course. I make sure all the food is fresh. Was something wrong?”
Customer: “Your dressings are too sweet!”
Me: “We buy our dressings pre-packaged, but it is possible that something went wrong somewhere along the way. Which one was it?”
Customer: “The dressing!”
Me: “They are all too sweet?”
Customer: “Were you born simple? The dressing is sweet!”
Me: “Is it red, orange, white, or brown?”
Customer: “The brown one is too sweet!”
Me: “That’s the balsamic vinaigrette. It shouldn’t be sweet at all, but I will pull it and put out a new container of dressing for you.”
Customer: “Thank you! Was that so difficult?”
(I begin to pull the only brown dressing we have and she stops me.)
Customer: “My God, you are such an idiot! You’re pulling the wrong d*** dressing!”
Me: “You said the brown dressing, right? I am pulling the brown dressing like you asked.”
Customer: “Not that dressing, you idiot, this brown dressing. You are so stupid!” *points*
Me: “You mean the chocolate pudding?”
