Slices Of Confusion

, , , , , | Working | June 12, 2017

(My husband, toddler, and I are staying in a hotel adjacent to a well-known party street. It is about eight pm on a weeknight, and the area is starting to get busy but not crazy yet, so we decide to walk over to a nearby pizza shop to get a few slices to take back to the hotel. Again, we are stone-cold sober and have a toddler with us.)

Me: “Could I get a [Slice #1] and a [Slice #2], please?”

Pizza Girl: “Sure thing.” *Grabs [Slice #2] to put in oven, but not [Slice #1]*

Me: “Oh, I need a [Slice #1] too, please.”

Pizza Girl: *annoyed* “I got it.” *grabs a [Slice #1] to put in the oven and says to Cashier* “[Slice #1] and a [Slice #2].”

Cashier: “That’ll be [amount].”

Me: “Oh, I’m paying for [Husband], too.” *gesture to my husband and toddler, who are still standing by the pizza display and have not yet ordered*

Cashier: *annoyed* “It’s [same amount].”

Me: *confused* “For four slices?”

Cashier: “Wait, what?” *turns to Pizza Girl who is getting my slices out of the oven* “She’s getting four slices?”

(It finally dawns on Pizza Girl that my husband might like to order, and she takes his order while Cashier rings me up for all four slices. Pizza Girl then hands us each two flimsy paper plates with huge slices of pizza on them, which we’ll obviously need to somehow manage to walk somewhere with while holding a toddler, as there is no dining area.)

Husband: “Could we get a couple extra plates, please? We need to walk back to our hotel with these.”

Pizza Girl: “Oh, would you like boxes?”

Me: *wondering why they wouldn’t think to offer these before* “Yes, please.”

(Seriously, if four slices of pizza was that much trouble for them, I’d hate to see what a mess that place is at two am!)

Give Yellow Peas A Chance

, , , , , | Right | June 6, 2017

(I make pizzas to order at a large supermarket chain in the UK. We have a selection of toppings to choose from, the vegetable ones being on display at the front. An elderly male customer’s pizza is nearly finished; he is choosing his last topping.)

Customer: *pointing to the tub that clearly contains sweetcorn* “And some yellow peas.”

Me: *trying not to giggle as it put a scoop of it on the pizza* “Aaaand some sweet-corn.”

(We now like to refer to the sweet-corn as ‘yellow peas.’)


Caught In A Supreme Lie

, , , | Right | June 2, 2017

(I work in a pizza restaurant known for its “$5 Hot and Ready” pizzas. Every day from 11 am to 2 pm, we sell lunch combos, which is half a deep dish and a 20 oz drink. The advertisements for the lunch combos clearly state they are only available until 2 pm. It is around 2:30 pm.)

Customer: “Hi, I’d like a lunch combo.”

Me: “Okay, but it will be seven minutes since we don’t have one up.”

Customer: “Why don’t you have one ready? I don’t have time to wait!”

Me: “We don’t have one ready because we don’t keep Lunch Combos Hot and Ready after 2 pm.”

Customer: “Where does it say that?”

Me: “It’s on the advertisement at the bottom.” *points to cardboard advertisement on counter*

Customer: “I’m in a hurry! I don’t have time to read signs! Never mind, I don’t want it anymore! I’ll just take a Supreme.”

Me: “We don’t keep those Hot and Ready until four. It will take about five to six minutes.”

Customer: “That’s fine. I’ll wait.”

(Guess he wasn’t in that big a hurry after all.)

Deep Pan-ic!

, , | Right | May 31, 2017

(I work at a franchise pizza restaurant in my home town. It is a strictly delivery/carry-out place, and we tend to get pretty busy towards the end of the week. I usually work at the cut table, which is in full view of the counter. A particularly peeved looking customer walks in.)

Customer: “Hey! Somebody help me here; I’m already late!”

Manager: “So sorry, sir. I’ll be right with you.”

(He rings him up, and informs him his pizza will be ready momentarily. The customer huffs and stands by the wall to wait. I’m quickly and efficiently working the cut table, trying to keep up with two ovens. I come to the customer ‘s order.)

Me: *goes through the usual motions and then finds that the pizza is stuck to the pan* “Oh, no.”

(I frantically separate the pizza from the pan to keep up with the other orders and wind up destroying it in the process. I flip the pizza into the box and immediately yell for a remake. The customer, who saw me the entire time, yells for the manager.)

Manager: “Yes, sir?”

Customer: “I saw that employee cutting my pizza. He’s got a real attitude problem! He got angry, destroyed my pizza, and threw it in a box! I demand you have him reprimanded.”

Manager: “I’m sorry, sir. He wasn’t getting angry. Your pizza was stuck to the pan and he did the best he could with what he had while trying to keep up with the volume of orders still coming out of the ovens. We’re remaking your pizza as you speak. I can give you a store credit for the inconvenience.”

Customer: “I don’t care! I…”

(He continues to be irrational and abusive. At this point, a few of my coworkers I’m good friends with listen in while waiting on their deliveries.)

Me: “How are we coming with that re-make?”

Coworker: “It’s in the oven!”

(Eventually we get him the re-make. He walks out, then comes back in, whereupon he demands the original as well. The manager, sick of dealing with him, agrees. He finally leaves for real.)

Me: *flips off the door*

Coworker #1: “Prick!”

Coworker #2: *gives the universal “up yours” gesture*

Manager: *turns around, sees all of us* “Good riddance! [My Name], you did what you could. That guy had no right to accuse you like that.”

Coworker #1: *lightly punches my arm* “Although you need to work on your attitude problem, mister!”

(We all laughed and continued working. We never saw that customer again.)

A Perfectly Normal Reaction When It Comes To Pizza

| Bellmead, TX, USA | Right | May 24, 2017

(I have just finished delivering a pizza to an apartment complex and am walking back to my car when I pass a little boy, no older then four, and his mother when this happens.)

Little Boy: “Bye, pizza lady. I love you!”

Me: *laughing* “I don’t think it’s me you love. It’s the pizza!”

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