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Not Much Meat In The Brain, Part 3

, , , , , | Right | November 29, 2022

Customer: “Can I have a Meat Lovers pizza with no ham, beef, pork, sausage, or pepperoni?”

Me: “That’s a cheese pizza, ma’am.”

Customer: “No! I want a meat lovers pizza.”

Me: “With no meat? That’s a cheese pizza.”

The customer fumes.

Me: “Okay, one Meat Lovers pizza coming up.”

The great thing is that since she insisted, I just rang it up as Meat Lovers and removed the toppings, so she ended up paying $5 more for the pizza.

Not Much Meat In The Brain, Part 2
Not Much Meat In The Brain

A Little Slice Of Doing The Right Thing

, , , , , , , | Right | CREDIT: MelonGodVEVO | November 23, 2022

I work for a pizza place. I’ve been delivering for about three weeks now, and tips are either really bad or pretty good.

I go to the door for a delivery and a kid answers; his mom is in the back. I hand him the order: a personal pizza.

Me: “Hi. Your total is [total].”

I’m pretty sure he is just happy to pay for something because, without hesitation, he hands me a $100 bill, claps, and runs to his mom to tell her he paid.

I don’t notice it is a hundred and think it is ten, so I walk back to my car. Then, I see that the bill he gave me has that blue line and gold 100 on it. I get really happy, but I realize that I’d feel guilty if I left.

I go back and knock on the door. The mom answers and looks really confused. I show her the bill.

Me: “Your little boy gave me this.”

Mom: “[Boy], come here, please.” *To the boy* “Where did you get this?”

Boy: “I got it from your purse!”

Mom: *To me* “I’m so glad you brought this back; it was supposed to be for our groceries this week.”

In the end, I got a $3 tip, but I didn’t mind since I’d just saved a family from going hungry for a couple of days.

Here’s A Tip: Don’t Mess With The People Who Handle Your Food

, , , , , , , | Right | CREDIT: Seahawks3B | November 21, 2022

I deliver pizzas. I’m on my last delivery of the night. It’s a nicer house. I pull up, grab the pizzas out of my car, and walk toward the driveway.

Two figures pop out from behind a bush next to the garage. It’s dark out, so I can barely see them. One has a hood on with his drawstrings pulled so that most of his face is covered. It freaks me out. I think they are middle schoolers or possibly freshmen in high school, tall enough that I confuse them for possible adults at first.

Anyway, it freaks me out and I just stop.

Me: “What are you guys doing?”

I am so scared that I am about to get robbed.

They don’t say a word. One just holds up money, so I walk up the driveway by the garage to meet them. They have a phone propped up against the garage door and one starts giggling. I think maybe they are trying to film a prank. Once I get closer, I can see they are between thirteen and fifteen years old.

Me: “Hey, just so you guys know, you don’t want to be dressing and acting like that, because the pizza delivery guy is gonna think you’re trying to rob them.”

They just mock what I said, so I opened the bag and hand one of them the pizzas.

Me: “Wait until you guys have to work a job like this.”

The other one mocks me again and then — it turns out the phone is on a FaceTime call — some kid on the phone speaks up.

Phone Kid: “Give them the pizza, you monkey!”

And they all laugh. I don’t say anything. Then, the kid with the hood gives me $22.

Kids: *In unison* “Keep the change, ya filthy animal!”

And they walked inside, laughing. I thought it was odd that I would give him the pizzas before getting the money because I know better than that. I looked at the delivery tab, and just as I thought, IT WAS ALREADY PAID FOR. $20.95 had already been paid for by credit card. I didn’t say a word and just left.

Now, I’m not a bad guy. Normally, when this happens or someone doesn’t realize how much change they should have, I always, ALWAYS, ask if they would like change. But after being mocked, f***ed with, called a monkey and an animal, and told to keep the change, I decided I would. No way I was gonna chase them to their door to give them that back after the way they treated me.

I’m thinking they ordered online and their parents left them money or something and they didn’t realize it was paid for. That, or they were just very generous with the tip. I’m eighteen, and honestly, I might’ve thought what they were doing was funny years ago, but working low-paying customer service jobs has changed my perspective. I don’t find pranks that mess with employees funny anymore. Hopefully, these two learn a lesson.

A Hot Slice Of Justice, Part 9

, , , , , , | Right | November 15, 2022

I work at a pizza vendor in a Canadian airport. All we sell is eight types of pizza. Our ovens are very hot, so it only takes us eight minutes to cook a pizza. When a person places their order, we ring them up, they pay, and we tell them their order number, which is also printed on their receipt. We call out the order number when it’s ready.

Being an airport, people naturally have flights to catch, so very few wander far away from our seating area, especially since we tell them their order will be ready in under ten minutes.

A man comes up and orders a plain cheese pizza. He pays, and I tell him his order number is number seventy-two and that it will be ready in eight minutes.

Over the next eight minutes, my coworker and I prepare orders and call out the order numbers that are ready. If there is a pizza still sitting on the counter, we will call out the new order number and then the order number(s) of any unclaimed pizzas. We go through orders sixty-eight to seventy-one, which are all claimed.

We get to this man’s pizza

Me: “Order number seventy-two is ready!”

No one comes up to pick it up, but being busy, we don’t pay too much attention. Some people make a quick run to the restroom or are listening to music on their phone or something.

A minute later, the next order is ready.

Me: “Order number seventy-three is ready! Order number seventy-two is ready!”

A lady comes up, and takes order seventy-three, but order seventy-two remains untouched.

This goes on for over fifteen minutes, with several orders after him being called out and picked up. This man’s order number has been called out at least ten times.

Finally, we get to order number eighty-one.

Me: “Order number eighty-one is ready! Order number seventy-two is ready!”

A man comes up and picks up order eighty-one, and a few seconds later, the man who ordered seventy-two finally comes up and claims his pizza. He is not happy once he opens it up.

Keep in mind that airport security has a low tolerance for rude behavior and even less for threatening behavior, which can get you evicted from the airport, causing you to miss your flight, or at worst, even be arrested.

Customer: “Hey, my f****** pizza is cold!”

Me: “No need to swear at me, sir. Your pizza was ready fifteen minutes ago, and we’ve called your number out several times. I’ll be glad to reheat it for you. It will only take about thirty seconds to heat it up.”

Customer: *Very angrily* “No way. You will cook me a fresh pizza, and you will refund my money! I didn’t pay you to give me a d*** cold pizza and keep me waiting like this! I have a flight to catch!”

Me: “Sir, there is no need to shout or swear at me. Everyone here has a flight to catch. As I told you, your pizza was ready fifteen minutes ago, and we called out your order number several times, but you didn’t respond.”

Customer: “Bulls***! You just let my pizza sit there and get cold. I demand you cook me a fresh one and refund my money, or I’m going to come back there and f****** mess you all up! Fix this right now, or else!”

Once he makes this threat, my coworker contacts airport security, who arrives about three or four minutes later. Meanwhile, his tirade continues.

Me: “Sir, I am sure you are aware of airport rules regarding threatening behavior, and I will not tolerate being spoken to this way. I will reheat your pizza, and that’s the extent of what I’m willing to do.”

Customer: “No way!” *In a very angry, threatening tone* I… want… a… refund! And furthermore, I want a new—”

Me: *Interrupting him* “Sir! Stop this nonsense! I am not issuing you a refund, nor will I make you a fresh pizza. I told you already we called out your order number repeatedly over a fifteen-minute period and you didn’t respond. I am willing to reheat your pizza for you, no problem. But your behavior is against airport rules and can get you in serious trouble. So, I’ll advise you to calm down and take your pizza.”

Customer: “Utter f****** nonsense! I don’t see no d*** police badge on your chest, so don’t lecture me on the law! You never f****** called out my numbers; you just let my pizza sit there and get cold. This is—”

Me: *Interrupting him* “Stop it right there, sir! I am done with your abuse.”

I see security approaching behind him.

Me: “Those men coming over will handle this matter now.”

Security Man #1: “Sir, please calm down.” *To me* “What’s going on here?”

Customer: “I’ll tell you what going on here! This b**** of a woman—”

Security Man #1: *Interrupting* “Sir, please be quiet. I was addressing the employee, not you. Please allow her to answer.”

Meanwhile, the second security officer has stationed himself next to the man, ready to cuff him or whatever, should it become necessary.

Me: *To [Security Man #1]* “This gentleman is upset because his pizza — which we called out as being ready over fifteen minutes ago — naturally got cold. I offered to reheat it for him, but he immediately became belligerent and threatening to us.”

Customer: “That’s bulls***! I did no such thing. She’s trying to cover for her ineptness!”

Me: “My coworker and I called out his order number eight or ten times, and he never responded. He must’ve left the area or something.”

Customer: “Bulls***!”

Security Man #2: “Sir, I am not talking to you. Please be quiet. And now I will ask you once and once only, place your hands behind your back. You are under arrest for threatening behavior in an airport.”

Customer: *Attempting to push him away* “No! She’s lying and I will not be cuffed! I have a flight to catch in forty minutes. They are already boarding! You f****** need to let me go now!

Security Man #2: “I’m afraid you won’t be making that flight. Place your hands behind you right now! I’m done arguing with you!”

The man continued to argue, swear, and fight with them. The two security men finally got him cuffed and took him away. He was arrested and fined. He was also banned from entering or flying out of all the airports in Canada for life.

All for a cold pizza he was late in picking up.

A Hot Slice Of Justice, Part 8
A Hot Slice Of Justice, Part 7
A Hot Slice Of Justice, Part 6
A Hot Slice Of Justice, Part 5
A Hot Slice Of Justice, Part 4

Thankfully Didn’t Drone About The Time Zone

, , , , | Right | November 12, 2022

I work in a pizza place that is near a state border. The two states are in different time zones — thirty minutes apart.

A man comes in one day and stands around waiting, not approaching the counter. This isn’t unusual; I figure he made an online order and is just waiting for us to call out his name and say it is ready. After a little bit, he starts getting annoyed and eventually comes up to the counter.

Customer: “Where is my order? I did a timed order to be ready at 5:30, and I have been waiting here for fifteen minutes and it is still not ready!”

Me: “Sir, it’s only 5:15.”

He looked a little embarrassed after that and explained that he was from across the border, so his watch was set to the other time zone. Hopefully, he didn’t have somewhere urgent he needed to be, or he might have been thirty minutes late!