My wife and I were driving from our home in Houston, Texas to Oklahoma City; my wife had business there. It’s roughly a seven-hour trip by car, and we realized around Dallas (roughly the halfway point) that we’d both left stuff behind in Houston — including my prescription medications. I had two major chain pharmacies’ apps on my phone, so I checked both of them to see which one had a twenty-four-hour pharmacy; by the time we made it to OKC, it’d be well after most normal pharmacies would be closed.

I found a [Pharmacy], went in, explained the issue to the pharmacist, and told him the literal number of pills I needed just to get me through the next three days. He tried to get a hold of my mail-order pharmacy to approve it, but at that time of night, their office was closed. He ended up telling me:

Pharmacist: “Here’s what we’re gonna do. I’m gonna give you the exact number of pills you need to get through the next three days. Tomorrow morning, I’m gonna email the mail-order pharmacy and tell them what happened. The next time you get your actual refill, they’re gonna short you the number of pills I just gave you, but you’re gonna pay the same amount you always pay since that’s easier than me trying to figure out how to charge you for this very small number of pills. Fair?”

I agreed it was, so that’s what he did.

The next time I emailed the mail-order place for an official refill, when they sent me my refills, they also sent a note explaining that they’d shorted the pills by the amount the OKC pharmacy had given me. No harm, no foul, everyone was on the same page, my pills did get paid for properly, and all was well.

I live in Oklahoma, and those of us in the south know that [Discount Variety Store] locations exist about every two miles, regardless of whether you’re in the middle of the city or the middle of the desert. (At least, it feels that way.)

In a recent [Store] ad, they had a “buy two, get one free” deal for twelve-packs of Coke products. Then, when I get to the store, on the shelf, there’s the local sticker that says they are two for $14. Cool, with the buy-two deal, that’s thirty-six cans for $14, instead of thirty-five for $18 at [Warehouse Store].

I buy Coke for both home and the office, so when it’s on sale like this, I like to get quite a bit. I load nine of the twelve packs into my cart and go to the register.

Now, here in Oklahoma, grocery items ARE taxable. The clerk rings them up and tells me the total is (rounding) $52.

Uh, no.

Me: “These are on sale; buy two, get one free. Two for fourteen times three is $42, plus tax, so about $46.”

The clerk is confused and calls the store manager. They have to shut the register down, and the manager has to go into the office and calculate just exactly how things are screwed up.

Manager: “Okay. The register is only giving you a $2.65 discount on each pack instead of what I think should be a $2.95 discount, times nine packs, and it is ringing them at $7.95 minus the $2.95.”

Me: “Um, no, that means you’re still charging too much, because it means you’re charging $5 per case, or $45 plus tax, instead of $42.”

She did finally get it right, and I apologized, saying I just didn’t want to be one of THOSE customers, but it’s fairly simple math. And I was doing it all in my head because I learned HOW to do simple math in my head and not be dependent upon a calculator about fifty-five years ago.

Some years ago, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I went through all the treatment, surgeries, chemo, you name it. A couple of years later, at the three-month follow-up, my oncologist, upon consultation, didn’t like that he could feel some lumps under my arm, so he put in a request for a PET scan.

A PET scan is an imaging test where you are given a slightly radioactive glucose IV shot, wait an hour, and then go through a machine. Cancer being sugar-avid, if there is any tumor, it will light up on the screen.

My insurance denied the request because I didn’t have a CT scan done that would warrant the need for a PET scan; PET scans are more expensive than CT scans.

The oncologist then put in a request for a CT scan.

The insurance denied it because I didn’t have an MRI scan done that would warrant the need for a CT scan, CT scans being more expensive than MRI scans.

Then, my oncologist put in a request for an MRI scan.

The insurance promptly denied that because I didn’t have an XRay done that would warrant the need for an MRI scan.

And this is how I ended up having an XRay, an MRI scan, a CT scan, and a PET scan because insurance wanted to save the money for the PET scan. I got subjected to way more radiation than necessary for them to pay five times the cost they wanted to save.

It was negative. Years later, I am still cancer-free.

I’m working at a Korean-style cafe. We have a pretty big dining room with about 25% taken up by studying students when, around 9:30 pm, a group of about eight comes in wearing matching shirts sporting the logo of a well-known religious organization.

Group #1: “All of us will be on one tab. There are actually about twenty-five people in our group; we’re just waiting on the rest.”

We like to have people call ahead for groups bigger than ten so that we can prepare and make tables big enough to fit them. Twenty-five is a lot of people, but it’s doable, so my coworker starts taking their orders and I start making drinks. About halfway through the first eight orders, more people wearing matching shirts with the same logo but a different color come in. We figure it’s the rest of the group. 

Group #2: “We’re all going to be on one tab. There’re about twenty in our group.”

Me: “Oh, the rest of your group already told us! You don’t have to explain.”

I gesture to the first group.

Group #2: “Oh, we aren’t part of that group.”

Now we are expecting about forty-five people to be in the store, which is way more than average, and that’s usually after people order in scattered order and sit for a few hours, not all at once about an hour and half before close. We would usually start closing things down around now, anyway, because the owners like to make sure we aren’t staying too late after we close to clean.

We know s*** is getting real; it’s the biggest rush I’ve ever been in. But it gets bigger.

We end up with another three groups of people in the same shirts, each group a different color, ranging from ten to twenty-five people in each group. We have at the very least seventy-five people come in and order drinks and some desserts within a thirty-minute period.

I stop to talk to one of the customers.

Me: “What’s going on? You’re all in matching shirts.”

Customer: “We’re having a district meeting for the staff of [Organization]. It’s just a coincidence that we all showed up at the same cafe!”

I got all the drinks done thirty minutes before we closed, and for the first and only time in my time here, I had to make a last call for drinks because we would have been there all night otherwise. We made over $250 in thirty minutes. Many of our regulars left because there wasn’t any walking room. My coworker had to go outside and come back in another entrance just to serve people their drinks because they were blocking all walkways in the store.

When they were leaving, two of the group leaders came up to my coworker and me — both of us sweating, panting, and looking all kinds of tired — and handed us a business card for their organization and said we should join them sometime. None of the groups or individual people tipped at all.

There is a fun event for families like mine in a city not too far away, less than 200 miles. We go every year. This year, I decide to make a mini-vacation out of it since the older kids are available. I book an AirBnB for all of us for two nights, get tickets to our favorite museums, and confirm our reservation for the annual event. I do this all on a single credit card so I can keep track of the cost of the trip and maximize my “points.” 

We check into the Airbnb, go to the event, and have a great time. But the next day, things start well and go downhill. We go to the museum with our pre-paid tickets and love the exhibit. We stop at the gift shop to get some pretty things and use my card. No problems.

Then, we go next door to the botanical gardens and my card is declined. Embarrassed, I step out of line and call the card company. After all the confirmation hoopla…

Me: “Hello. I’m on a vacation with my family and my card was just declined. Have I come close to my limit? Was there a purchase I forgot about?”

Representative: “No. It looks like the card was flagged for suspected fraud.”

Me: “Oh, dear! What is that about? Was the card number used somewhere else?”

Representative: “We have an attempted use at [Botanical Garden].”

Me: “Yes, that is me. I am standing here at the botanical garden and planned to purchase tickets for the family with this card.”

Representative: “It looks like this purchase is being made in a location that seems suspect.”

Me: “Why? The botanical gardens are over fifty years old. It’s not a fly-by-night sort of thing.”

Representative: “It is flagged because it is not near the billing address.”

Me: “Well, no, it isn’t particularly near my billing address, but it is within a short drive. I am here, in this city, as should be obvious by the recent purchases on this card. I made a purchase literally fifty yards from here about twenty minutes ago. This isn’t the first time I’ve been to this city. I need to use this card. What can be done?”

Representative: “Oh, okay. I will make a note and release the hold.”

Me: “Thank you.”

I think that was weird, but after getting back in line, the tickets are purchased and we have a nice walk through the gardens.

Then, we stop for drinks before going back to the house. The card is declined. I pull out my debit card instead but later call the card company again.

Me: “Hello. I just tried to use my card and again, the transaction was denied.”

Representative: “It looks like the card has been suspended for suspected fraud.”

Me: “I called a few hours ago and explained that I am in this town and I will be using this card in this town. Is there no note in the file?”

Representative: “Yes, I see a note that a purchase to [Botanical Gardens] was authorized after suspected fraud.”

Me: “Yes. I am still in this town. I plan to be here for another twenty-four hours. I need this card to work.”

Representative: “The hold has been released. You can try this transaction again.”

Me: “Yeah, I didn’t stand in line in a [Convenience Store] to make this call. That purchase has been taken care of, but I need to know that I will not be embarrassed at dinner tonight when I try to use this card.”

Representative: “Everything has been taken care of.”

We go out to dinner and enjoy the food, but I am thinking the whole time that there will be an embarrassment at the end. And there is.

Waiter: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but your card has been declined.”

The kids all burst out laughing, having been told of the previous issues. I hand over my debit card while gnashing my teeth. After we leave the restaurant, our plan is to walk around the downtown area for a while. I send the kids ahead and find a bench to sit on to make a call.

Me: “I want to make something clear. I am in this town. This is not the first time I have been here nor it will be the last. I booked a place to stay for two nights using this card. I booked tickets using this card. I booked these things weeks ago. There was no issue. I am now in the town where the tickets and housing are located. While here, I had planned to eat and drink and maybe see a few other sights. I had planned to use this card. However! I have been thwarted at several turns. Tell. Me. Why.”

Representative: “I am so sorry. I see notes here that you have authorized the use of your card at [Botanical Gardens] and have called about another denied purchase. I see there is a denied charge at [Restaurant] less than an hour ago.”

Me: “Yes! Why?”

Representative: “It would look as if these transactions were flagged for suspected fraud.”

Me: “Why?”

Representative: “It looks as if the location is—”

Me: “The location is less than 200 miles from the billing address. Have you never traveled more than 200 miles? Is it company policy that cardholders not travel? Is it so unheard of that someone who lives in a smallish town might go to ‘the big city’ once in a while?”

Representative: “Well, for your safety—”

Me: “Yes, I do appreciate that you may be looking out for my financial safety, but I have explained twice that I am here, in this town. And yet, a third time, my card was flagged.”

Representative: “That does seem excessive. I will put a note in—”

Me: “That won’t be necessary. I am canceling this card. I will use my debit card for the remainder of my stay here. Dealing with this card is not good for my blood pressure. You’ve lost a customer. I know that means nothing to you, or even the company, but this is just too ridiculous.”

Representative: “But you’ll lose your points! What can we do for you to reconsider?”

Me: “Goodbye.”

When I got home, I paid off the remainder of the balance online, canceled it, and cut the card in half. I will now make it a habit to bring TWO credit cards along with my debit card on vacations, even if I’d only planned to use one.