Right Working Romantic Related Learning Friendly Healthy Legal Inspirational Unfiltered

This Lie Has A Date Of Death

, , , , , , | Right | December 7, 2021

I work as an usher for a large chain cinema. Any horror film rated age fifteen is like a magnet to kids who often get people to buy them tickets and are shocked when they are ID’ed by an usher. Another issue is that kids that age are too young for driver’s licences and often genuinely don’t have any ID. I find that asking for their date of birth is surprisingly effective in weeding out people who are genuinely underage.

A group of about six fairly young-looking boys and girls line up to get their tickets torn, and surprisingly, some have ID showing that they are actually fifteen. I have this conversation with one of the girls.

Me: “Hi, can I see your ID, please?”

Girl: “Oh, hi! I don’t actually have any ID, but I’m fifteen today; we’re out for my birthday.”

Me: “Oh, hey, that’s great. Happy birthday. What’s your date of birth?”

Girl: “Uh, ummm… it’s today’s date and the year is… ummm…”

Her Friend: “Just take fifteen away from today’s date!”

Me: “Look, I’m sorry, but I’m pretty sure you can appreciate that this isn’t exactly convincing, can’t you? If you return to the lobby, they’ll be happy to exchange your tickets for any film rated under fifteen or refund you if you prefer.”

The group walks off looking a bit dejected. I phone the lobby to explain what happened. About fifteen minutes later, the group reappears and the girl stands at the end of the hall and glares at me before declaring:

Girl: “I don’t like you! You’re not very nice! I hate you!”

Then, she turned around and stomped off.

This Is One Scrambled Scam

, , , , | Right | CREDIT: gravelangel | December 6, 2021

Last week, we received five large boxes of bar supplies addressed to a person unknown to the hotel. They arrived a couple at a time, usually with other orders, and weren’t immediately noticed until all the stock was sorted and put away.

By the end of the week, an online travel agent reservation appeared with the mystery person’s name, and we all figured this guest had things shipped for a business trip.

Less than eighteen hours after the reservation appeared, we got an email at the front desk from the guest.

Guest: “I have to cancel my reservation as I have [contagious illness]. Attached are three labels to ship the items to [Third Party on the east coast].”

I was seeing red flags and decided to give the equipment vendor a call. I explained what I was seeing.

Representative: “I think that’s legit; they paid upfront. Let me check.”

I was put on hold and the rep soon came back.

Representative: “The card used was flagged for fraud. Can I send you some labels to ship it all back to us?”

It was over $10,000 of equipment, and they were pretty happy to get it back.

My question is this: am I a bad person for packing up several boxes of expired hard-boiled eggs and shipping them to the scammers using the prepaid labels they sent?


This story is part of the Highest Voted of 2021 roundup!

Read the next Highest Voted of 2021 roundup story!

Read the Highest Voted of 2021 roundup!

Her Friends Are As Red As Her Hair

, , | Right | December 3, 2021

A diner has put her own hair in her half-eaten plate of food and is now throwing a royal fit.

Customer: “I demand that my meal be comped, and I want to speak to the manager!”

I go into the back of the restaurant, pull out the orange hair with three inches of regrowth, and ask the Mexican guys in the kitchen:

Me: “HEY, DID ANY OF YOU BRING A WIG TO WORK TODAY?”

They tell me to f*** off. I go back out to the customer:

Me: “Ma’am, nobody on staff has red hair with blonde roots.”

I say this while staring directly at her disastrous dye job.

Me: “However, the manager said we would be happy to buy dessert for the whole table to make up for this strange phenomenon.”

The four other people at the table were clearly mortified and declined dessert. She ordered cheesecake and they all sat there and glared at her while she devoured it.

Some Landlords Just Aren’t Good Lords Over Their Land

, , , , , , , | Legal | December 1, 2021

Ages ago, before the Internet and cell phones, I shared an apartment with three of my buddies near the university we attended. When we first looked at the place, there were some obvious issues with the building itself and with the particular apartment we were looking at. We were assured that everything would be taken care of. Yes, we were naive.

The building supposedly was “secure” in that it had a lobby separated from the interior of the building by a locked door that could be opened by key or by a button in each apartment. There was a phone in the lobby that would ring the phone in an apartment if you entered the apartment number. The door worked as advertised except there was a missing glass panel in the lobby where, by ducking through the opening, you could get into the secured area. The phone also worked, but the phone numbers it rang were never updated, so entering our apartment number rang some poor folks who happened to have the number of whoever lived there years ago.

The first winter, we discovered that the fans on two of the three electric heaters didn’t work. We reported it to the superintendent (who lived across the hall from us) but it was never fixed. Eventually, we got them to work ourselves, but they were really noisy.  

The toilet tank leaked into the bowl which would then eventually flush after about an hour and repeat. Yeah, reported and not fixed, so I figured out how to replace the seal on my own.  

There was some damage to the walls and inside doors; one area looked like the previous tenants had a dartboard and were very bad at darts. That also was reported and then never fixed. There was cracked glass in some windows, there were doors that didn’t close properly, etc., etc. Always the same thing: reported and never fixed.

After about a year, the building was sold to a different company. This had no effect on any repairs.

Oh, remember that superintendent? One day, I came home from class and there was a big lock over their door handle and an eviction notice stapled to their door. I happened to have parked in front of the main window into their apartment, and the next morning I noticed it was broken and their stuff was all gone from their apartment. I guess they did a “midnight move”. This led to some confusion for a while as that is where we were supposed to drop off the rent.

Eventually, we all graduated and moved out. A while went by, and we were informed that we were not getting our security deposit back “because of the damage you did to the apartment”. Fortunately, we had documented everything, and the one guy who was still living nearby managed to get them to issue checks to each of us for our part of the security deposit.

And — drum roll — the checks were returned when we deposited them because the checking account had been closed — for quite some time as it turned out. Oh, well, they would issue new ones… if we stopped by their offices in person. They were open Monday through Friday, eight to five. As the individual amount was only just over $100, it was not worth it to take time off from work and drive there from my current living location, which I would guess was their plan all along.

A few years later, I read about the companies that had owned the building while I lived there. They had a scheme where they would sell their buildings to each other every so often which “reset the clock” on repairs that the city housing inspectors had ordered. From talking with other people who had lived in their other buildings, apparently ours was better than most, which is hard to believe. At least the city eventually caught on and changed things so their scheme didn’t work.

The last time I was in that neighborhood, the building was still there, and I was tempted to peek in the lobby and see if that glass panel was ever replaced.

When Will These Idiots Learn That Cameras Are Everywhere?!

, , , , | Legal | November 29, 2021

One evening, my wife was telling me about her day. It seems that an old lady had sent her work a letter threatening to sue them for a slip-and-fall injury sustained on their premises.

When they looked at the camera recordings of the incident, they could clearly see the old lady walk onto the doormat in the front entrance, spot a patch of wet mat, go over to it, make an exaggerated slipping motion, and then very carefully lie down on the floor before calling for help.

My wife isn’t sure what will happen about it, since it went straight to the company’s lawyer, but I can imagine the old lady won’t get any satisfaction out of it.

Also, the old lady happened to be my best friend’s grandmother.