A coworker of mine relayed this story to me when he was doing pest control in an area where the homes were spaced very far apart and were often summer homes for the rich and affluent, so they sat empty for many months of the year.

He arrived at the summer home of a customer and began working around the exterior. He noticed an extension cord plugged into one of the exterior outlets and trailing off into the distance. He followed the cord, which attached to another cord, then another, and another, for the minutes it took to reach the next house over, where it became apparent the cords were leading. I forget the exact distance, but I believe it was somewhere in the realm of two miles between the houses.

Naturally, he called the customer and innocently inquired if they had given their neighbor permission to leach their power while they were away.

The customer promptly called the local police. Not sure what came of that, but a while later my coworker received a gift basket and thank-you card from the customer.

A bit of backstory for anyone reading old stories years from now: there’s a global health crisis going on, and a lot of people are acting like it’s either fake or no big deal. I’m waiting for an x-ray, and I overhear some medical workers talking.

Worker #1: “Did you hear that [disease] causes a loss of ability to orgasm?”

Worker #2: “No! Where did you hear that?”

Worker #1: “My girlfriend and I made it up, but if we spread that around, maybe people would actually care.”

This story is part of our Best Of August 2020 roundup!

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I’m working as a cashier in one of the speedy checkout lanes when a little girl, about seven or eight, walks up with a king-sized chocolate bar and cash to pay for it while her father hangs back and lets her do the transaction on her own.

Me: “That’s a lot of chocolate. You sure you can eat all this?”

Little Girl: “I’m going to share it!”

I pull the candy bar closer.

Me: “Oh, my gosh! Really? You’re going to share it with me?” 

The little girl has a shy smile and shakes her head.

Me: “Oh?”

I pretend to be disappointed.

Me: “You’re not? You mean, you’re just going to share it with your family?”

The little girl nods vigorously.

Me: “Oookay, here you go!”

I hand back the candy bar and change.

Me: “Have a nice day!”

Her father ended up coming back through my line with another of the same chocolate bar. I had a sneaky suspicion when I rang him up and, sure enough, after he paid for it, he gave it to me! I thanked him profusely and shared the chocolate with my coworkers. Working in retail isn’t always a great experience, but it’s people like that who make it easier.

Related:
What A Sweet Gesture

This story is included in our Feel-Good roundup for July 2020!

Read the next Feel-Good Story here!

Read the July 2020 Feel-Good roundup!

Me: “Hi, [Insurance Company #1], this is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, I’d like to pay my [Insurance Company #2]’s bill.”

Me: “I am sorry, but you have called [Insurance Company #1], not [Insurance Company #2]. I can’t help you pay your bill.”

Customer: “Oh, then can you look up the number for my agent?”

Me: “I am sorry, but as I am from [Insurance Company #1], I don’t have access to agent information for [Insurance Company #2].”

Customer: “Can’t you look it up on your computer on the Yellow Pages?”

Me: “Ma’am, I am sorry but I can’t. I don’t have access to outside sites.”

Customer: “Can’t you use your phone to look it up? Like on your iPhone or something?”

Me: “Ma’am, I cannot assist you.”

Customer: “I just want to pay my bill. It’s under [Customer].”

Me: “I am sorry, but I have already explained to you that I do not work for the company that carries your insurance, so I cannot process a payment for you.”

Customer: “Okay, so look it up for me.”

Me: “Ma’am, I hope you get the help you need.”

I work for animal control for the city. I get a woman on the phone.

Caller: “I want to report some animal cruelty! You have to do something!”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. Tell me what happened.”

Caller: “It’s happening right now! These people are eating ducklings!”

Me: “They’re… eating ducklings? Where is this happening?”

Caller: “I’m watching this episode of Fear Factor and they’re on it right now peeling duck eggs and eating the baby ducks inside! It’s cruelty to animals!”

What the woman is describing is known as Balut, a food more commonly found in the Philippines.

Me: *Pauses* “Ma’am, you’re watching a television show. That is out of our jurisdiction.”

Caller: “But this is animal abuse! What are you going to do about it?!”

Me: “Like I said, ma’am, it’s a television show and therefore out of our jurisdiction. The only thing I can suggest is calling the network if you have a problem with their show.”

Caller: “YOU’RE ABSOLUTELY USELESS!” *Slams the phone down*