Send, Wait, Ask, Repeat

, , , , | Right | October 18, 2018

Me: “Okay, so I just sent you out an email. There are a few steps within that email we need to complete now. Let me know when you receive it, so I can walk you through the steps.”

Caller: “Okay, I’m waiting for it now.”

(A few minutes will pass without hearing anything.)

Me: “Have you received the email yet?”

Caller: “Oh! I was supposed to open that now? Let me log into my email.”

Who’s A Good Little Stand?

, , , | Right | October 17, 2018

(I work in a well-known pet store. We sell small plastic pools for dogs during the summer. A woman comes in and goes over to our display of plastic pools. They are sitting on top of black plastic stands that the price tag is fixed to.)

Customer: “Wow, these are only $10.99?”

Me: “Yep, and they are actually on sale if you are signed up for our membership program.”

Customer: *takes a stack of pools off one of the stands and puts them on the floor* “That’s great. This could really come in handy.”

Me: *realizing she isn’t talking about the pools, but the stand itself* “Oh, the stand is actually not for sale; it’s the pools that you just took off of it that are $10.99.”

Customer: “Oh… Well, where did you get the stands?”

Me: “I’m… not really sure. A home improvement store maybe?”

Customer: *instantly disappointed* “Oh, okay.”

(She left without buying anything and I haven’t seen her since.)

To Protect And Serve, But Not To Empower

, , , | Legal | October 14, 2018

Me: “This is [Police Department]. What is your emergency?”

Caller: “My power’s out.”

Me: “Do you believe someone is outside, and they cut your power?”

Caller: “No, the whole power is out in the area.”

Me: “Okay. Then you need to call the electric company.”

Caller: “But they aren’t open this late.”

Me: “There should be twenty-four hour number for the electric company to call in case of an emergency, ma’am.”

Caller: “I don’t know what it is. Why can’t you help me?”

Me: “Because this isn’t a police issue.”

Caller: “But all the power is out. My food will go bad! This is ridiculous!”

Me: “It’s still not a police issue.”

Caller: “What’s the number for the electric company, then?”

Me: “I’m afraid I don’t know.”

Caller: “You’re no help!” *click*

(The police have their own twenty-four hour number to call the electric company, but I wasn’t about to give it out. Sadly, too many people believe calling police will actually get their power turned back on.)

Not Even Bordering On Being Close To The Border

, , , , | Right | October 12, 2018

(A lady orders two pepperoni pizzas and her total comes out to $10.82. She hands me a ten and then pulls out Canadian coins for the change.)

Me: “Sorry, I can’t accept those as payment.”

Customer: “Why?”

Me: “Because this isn’t Canada?”

Customer: *argues with me saying it shouldn’t matter* “—you should accept them; some b*stard here gave them to me so you should have to take them back!”

(We aren’t allowed to argue with customers so I just stand there and repeat that I can’t accept her coins. Eventually she pulls out 82 cents then takes her order and throws her Canadian coins in our tip jar. My manager looks at me after she leaves and asks:)

Manager: “She does realize Canada is 1500 miles north of here, right?”

It’s Getting Laborious Day

, , , , , | Right | October 10, 2018

(I work at a coffee store inside a very busy mall. It’s Labor Day. This conversation happens about once every two minutes:)

Customer: “Wow. I can’t believe you have to work on Labor Day! I’m sorry!”

Me: “It’s okay! Maybe someday everyone will stop coming so all of us in the mall can have the day off, too!”

(Everyone I said that to looked so embarrassed as they looked around and realized we were absolutely slammed and it was their fault we were all there on a holiday.)

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