(I am twelve years old. We are at a popular theme park where there are “pavilions” from about a dozen countries with employees from the various places. We are in the China section and I have asked to buy a parasol. My dad does not like these theme parks and is very hot and cranky.)

Me: “May I buy a parasol, please?”

Employee: “Of course! Would you like your name written on it in Chinese?”

Dad: “Hey, can you write her name in Korean, instead?”

(My mom and I stare open-mouthed at my father.)

Employee: “Sorry, sir, but I do not know how to write in Korean.”

Dad: “God, I can’t understand why you won’t just put her f****** name in Korean!” *stomps away, my mom chasing after him*

Me: *to employee* “I am so sorry for him. My name’s [My Name].”

Employee: “It’s okay. Here you go — your name in Chinese!”

(To this day, we haven’t had the guts to ask my dad why he thought the Chinese employee would write my name in Korean!)

(I work at an amusement park. Every week, we run an event where we’re open late with lots of entertainment and a firework finale. The show is aimed at kids so we’re aware it’s a late night for them. We lose count of how many times we get asked this question, but this woman is a new level of special!)

Customer: “Excuse me. What time are the fireworks?”

Me: “We’ll set them off as soon as it’s dark enough, as early as we can.”

Customer: “Well, what time will that be?”

Me: “It will probably be about 9:00 pm; there will be an announcement just before so you have time to get a good spot.”

Customer: “That’s ridiculous! Why would you have them so late?!”

Me: “Sorry, but it’s not dark enough until then.”

Customer: “Don’t be so stupid! This is a kids’ park! How can you expect them to stay up so late?!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but it has to be dark so you’re able to see the fireworks. We can’t let them off until the sun’s setting or you wouldn’t see them.”

Customer: “This is so ridiculous! My grandson was looking forward to the fireworks! Now he’s going to be disappointed because you’re refusing to set them off any earlier!”

I have a summer job at an amusement park. I run the controls for an older rollercoaster. It is a normal day; a train has just come in full of guests and I release the locks on the seats so they can get off. As new passengers load, I realize the computer screen has gone to the dreaded “blue screen of death.”

The computer is locked in a cabinet, and I have never had this issue before, so I make an announcement and pull the switch that manually cuts power off to the ride. Then, I make a quick call to maintenance over the walkie talkie. Meanwhile, a group of guests gets upset that the ride is being cut off, refuses to leave the train and go back in line, and have started yelling at and pushing my coworkers. I step out to try to get the other guests away from them. Over the screaming and fighting, I don’t hear maintenance responding on the walkie talkie.

We are still trying to deal with the fight, calm screaming guests, and get other guests away from them when we look over and see several maintenance workers rushing up the path, along with managers, security, and first aid. There is a confused moment where we think they are here to help stop the fight, and they seem panicked and are asking weird questions.

It takes a minute for the misunderstanding to come out. My walkie talkie message, “The rollercoaster’s computer crashed; we need maintenance,” somehow was heard by everyone as just, “The rollercoaster crashed,” with a background of screaming, and no further response. They thought they were dealing with a much different scenario!

Thankfully, security was able to deal with the fighting guests, and we had high-up witnesses to their behavior resulting in a lifetime ban for the fighters. The computer was a simple reboot and maintenance had it running again in fifteen minutes. And, all ride operators were coached to say, “The computer has an error,” from that point on.

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(I work as a ride operator at an amusement park. Our company has a sort of exchange program overseas; we get international workers to come in and work for the company. I am working an older ride with one of the international exchange employees from Russia. The ride we are working on is based on a popular movie and was made in the mid-1990s. This means that because of the way it was manufactured, some people may have trouble fitting in the ride. The ride requires the operators to push down on a lap bar and then buckle a seatbelt on the side. If someone is too tall, or their thighs push on the lap bar, we cannot close it and therefore cannot let them ride. I am not the strongest person, but I always try my best to let all of our guests at the park ride. My Russian coworker has a bit of trouble speaking English, so he will often use shorter sentences to get to the point. The day in question is hot, and it is near the end of both of our shifts. I have been doing my best to fit people in, often having to use my legs to push down on the bar so I can get people buckled. I don’t want to ask my coworker for help, because I am embarrassed. However, I am having difficulty pushing down one lap bar. If he comes over and pushes, I can buckle it, but it is nearly impossible to do myself. I call him over and he walks up to the car in question.)

Me: “Can you help me push?”

(He looks at the guest and shakes his head.)

Coworker: “Too fat to ride.” *turns around to open the lap bar*

(I was mortified and had to tell the guest that “for their own safety, they could not ride.” Fortunately, the guest was very nice and accepted all of my numerous apologies. Looking back on it, I feel really bad for the guest, but at the same time I find, from a viewer’s standpoint, the entire ordeal amusing. I quit two months later.)

Related:
In Soviet Russia, Accent Speaks You!

(On a very hot day, I am operating a ride which spins and goes side to side… which makes people sick. Very often. The ride seats about 32 people at a time and seating can be difficult once in a while. On this particularly hot day, we have been struggling to seat a taller but very fit guest and have to do some moving around to get him in a more comfortable spot.)

Other Rider: “Dude, suck in your gut! You’re wasting our time!”

Me: “Don’t listen; you’re just taller so we need to switch your seat so your shoulders fit better.”

Coworker: “Hey! No need to be rude; we’ll get it started soon enough.”

(The rude rider then thought it was funny to start chanting with two of his buddies, saying, “Suck it in, suck it in, suck it in!” My co-operator and I started the ride and, as usual, everyone was having fun… until we heard a loud gasp and screaming… followed by a ton of puke hitting the center platform. I hit the emergency brake and waited for the ride to stop. It took a few minutes for it to stop completely turning and for the platform to rise… and then, like music to our ears… the taller guest and some strangers around him could be heard chanting, “He ate puke, he ate puke, he ate puke!” A kid decided to eat too many snacks before riding and puked all over that rude guy. Cleaning that vomit was definitely worth watching him do his walk of shame!)