Will Need Something Sweet After That Bitter Encounter

, , , , , | | Working | July 16, 2019

(I’m at an amusement park with my parents. I am eleven years old. They let me loose for a minute, and I decide to hit the strip of stores outside the park. I spot a chocolate shop. I pick up a candy bar and head to the checkout.)

Me: “One chocolate caramel bar, please!”

Cashier: “Where are your parents?”

Me: “Oh, they aren’t here right now.”

Cashier: *cutting me off* “Oh, my God! It’s people like your parents that ruin this place, letting these heathens loose to run amok around the park! And you should know you need an adult to buy candy! Well, you would if you weren’t raised by idiots.”

(A woman walks over to me from the display next to the register.)

Woman: “Jimmy!” *not my name* “There you are! I’m so sorry we got separated in the crowd. Let me pay for that candy bar!”

(My “mom” paid for the candy bar and took me to the exit. I thanked her a bunch and gave her half of the bar. I had a wonderful rest of the day.)

Back-Pack Attack

, , , | | Friendly | July 15, 2019

I’m about 12, on a field trip with my summer camp to an amusement park a few hours away from home. Like many kids in the early 2000s, I have a backpack monogrammed with my first name on it, which I am currently using to haul my lunch and swim gear. My first name is not unusual, but fairly uncommon in my area.

While waiting in line for a ride with my group, I hear someone shout my name. I don’t recognize the voice, but it’s instinctual to turn when you hear your name and mine is uncommon where I live, so I do. I don’t see anyone I know, so I assume the shout wasn’t meant for me and turn back around. I don’t leave the group, I don’t spend more than five seconds looking for the source, nor do I even respond verbally.

In a split second, a middle-aged, matronly figure full of self-righteous indignation comes barreling towards us. She begins to berate my camp counselors, lecturing them on how it’s unsafe for children to have their names on their backpacks, that they could easily be kidnapped because a stranger knows their name, and my turning around just proves her point. My counselors basically ignore her until she runs out of steam, at which she flounces back to whence she came. What she expected my 20-something camp counselors — all wearing bright yellow t-shirts with our camp logo on them and clearly herding a group of about 15 pre-teens — to do about a backpack my family had purchased for me in the middle of an amusement park is anyone’s guess. Or why she felt the need to prove her point with a 12-year-old who clearly knew not to walk off with strangers because they knew my first name. 

Almost 20 years later, I still have that backpack and use it regularly. Despite that women’s worst fears, I managed to avoid being kidnapped because of my backpack. And the number of people who even notice it has my name on it are far fewer than the people who don’t notice unless I point it out.

Having Cheap Parents Is A Wild Ride

, , , , , | | Related | July 15, 2019

(My wife and I are waiting at a well-known theme park in Florida. There is a family beside us — a father, mother, and two teenage daughters. Everyone is waiting for the rope drop when we overhear the following exchange between the father and one of the teenage daughters.)

Teenage Daughter: “Ooh, I can’t wait to go on the rides. I’m not going on any of the scary rides.”

Father: “We’re going on all the rides.”

Teenage Daughter: “Not the scary ones.”

Father: “We’re going on all the rides.”

Teenage Daughter: “No, I’m not going on anything scary.”

Father: “You begged me to come here. I paid 800 f****** dollars for these tickets. You’re going on every f****** ride.”

Teenage Daughter: *now nearly crying* “But I don’t want to go on the scary ones.”

Father: *glaring* “Every f****** ride!”

(Welcome to the happiest place on earth.)

Unfiltered Story #157564

, , , , | | Unfiltered | July 14, 2019

I am the second customer in line at the gift shop at a waterpark. The woman in front of me paid her $20 bill with a stack of wet singles. One clerk is using a piece of plastic to press the water out of the bills.

Me: Does that happen often?
Clerk: More than you know.
Me: I am so sorry.

( I paid with dry cash)

Unfiltered Story #157526

, , | | Unfiltered | July 10, 2019

(Im at a water park with family please note i have aspergurs which means I cant really control my emotions. well a group cuts in front of everyone close to the entrance. One of the girls has red hair dye coming out of her hair from the hair.)
Aunt’s boyfriend: umm excuse me but you just cut the line
(many people tell them but they are just not leaving. I feel myself getting angered and just need to calm down so, I went to the lifeguard about them, but the security cant come so we just wait.)
Bystander #1: excuse me can you please leave
Lady #1: oh boo hoo who cares
(turns to us) Lady #1: don’t you love how we are going to stay with each other for a half hour
(then i just couldn’t take it anymore)
Me: CANT YOU GUYS JUST SHUT UP AND LEAVE!!!!!!
Lady #1: Oh boo hoo I’m at (water park) and im crying over it.
Lady #2: that’s enough. Making fun of a kid! Lets all just go.
(they all just left but, unfortunately the security don’t get here on time and miss them. Luckily, they went after them and i hope they got kicked out)

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