Infarction Infraction

, , , , , , | Healthy | September 29, 2019

(I am on vacation with my family, and my fianceé and I have gone to one of several theme parks in the area. I have a medical condition that can cause severe heart palpitations, which can cause me to lose consciousness for a few minutes. We are standing in line for a ride when I begin to feel off; I know I’m about to have a bad episode and I tell my fianceé that I need to sit down. She understands and helps me get out of line, but we don’t make it far before I lose consciousness. As I am taller than she is — I’m 6’4” and she is 5’3” — she is unable to help me once I’m out and I fall to the ground. I wake up a few minutes later to the sound of my fianceé arguing with someone I don’t know.)

Fiancé: “Stop touching him like that! He doesn’t need CPR!”

Woman: “Of course he does! I’m a nurse and I know what a heart attack looks like!”

Me: *still very dazed* “What’s going on?”

(As I try to sit up, I’m forced back down onto the concrete.)

Fiancé: “Enough! Heart palpitations and heart attacks may look similar but they aren’t! If he was having a heart attack, he’d have the classic symptoms! He passed out because he has [specific medical condition]! Look at his medical alert bracelet, for f***’s sake!”

Woman: “People who have [specific medical condition] usually have an alert dog, and he doesn’t. Now let someone with actual medical training work!” *turns to me* “Now, son, you’re having a heart attack. I need you to calm your breathing down and–”

(By now, I’ve regained consciousness enough to know what is going on. I am still dazed, as I usually am after an episode, but I know this woman is full of it.)

Me: *sits up slowly, glaring at the woman before raising my medical alert bracelet* “I have [specific medical condition]. We are on holiday and I couldn’t bring my alert dog with me because she didn’t get her shots in time. Now, if you would kindly f*** off, all I want is some water and ice because I smacked my head when I fell.”

Woman: “How dare you speak to me like that?! I know what’s best for you! I’m a nurse!”

Me: “With all respect, kindly go f*** yourself. Any nurse would know the difference between palpitations and an infarction. I don’t know who you are, but if you try to do anything to me, I’m getting someone to call security and I’ll press charges.”

(The woman proceeded to yell, “I’m a nurse! I know what I’m doing!” and continued to scold my fianceé and me for “lying.” Security was called — by pro staff — and she was escorted away.)

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The Park Is Not Closing But The Customers Are Closing In

, , , , , | Working | September 28, 2019

I work at a popular theme park. Today, the park closes at 10:00, and it is currently 3:30. 

An announcement comes over the speaker system that says, “[Park] will be closing in 30 minutes. Thank you and have a good day.”

Cue everyone being confused and having a rush of customers who are either buying a whole lot of stuff or complaining about how they just got here and saying, “Doesn’t the park close at ten?” 

I see the line for guest service go out the door with angry customers demanding refunds because they just came and will have to leave. 

There is no announcement fixing the mistake and no supervisor calls the stores to tell them that there was a mistake. They just let the employees deal with irate customers.

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Unfiltered Story #163303

, , | Unfiltered | September 18, 2019

(I’m the bone-headed customer in this. A group of friends and I have decided to go to Disneyland and I notice that the flag is flying at half-mast. At Guest Services, I ask about it.)

Me: Why is the flag flying at half-mast?

Worker: Because it’s Memorial Day.

(The kicker? We had gone that day because we all had the day off…and I work for the military! Some memorial.)

A Sad Sign Of The Times

, , , , , | Friendly | September 13, 2019

(I am at the water park with my older brother, my fianceé, and her two younger brothers. Her youngest brother is deaf and speaks primarily using ASL. While we are waiting in line, my fianceé, her brother, and I are speaking to each other with ASL, making jokes about how hot it is. Behind us is a woman who grows quite huffy with us throughout the thirty-minute wait.)

Woman: *to us, raising her voice in a very angry, “motherly” tone* “How dare you make those signs with your hands?! I didn’t know [Park] allowed gang members into their parks! Despicable!”

Fiance: “We’re speaking sign; my brother is deaf and he can’t hear us.”

Woman: “I don’t want your excuses! I want you out of here!”

Fiance: “For talking with our hands? Lady, you’re off your meds if you think they’re going to kick us out for speaking sign language.”

Woman: “We’ll just see about that!” *stomps out of the line, presumably to find a security guard*

(We go through the rest of the line without seeing her, nor a security guard. We do see her when we get off the ride, however, being told by security that they won’t do anything.)

Woman: *at the top of her lungs, so everyone around the ride can hear* “That’s it! I’ll be speaking to Mr. [Park Founder] about this!”

Me: “I hope she has a ouija board!”

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You’re In Deep S*** Now

, , , , , | Working | September 6, 2019

(I work at an amusement park over the summer. I have recently been trained on an eight-ball-themed spinning ride, like an adult version of the children’s teacup ride.)

Me: *starting my shift* “Hey, [Coworker #1]!”

Coworker #1: “Hey. You have to clean up ball number twelve; I think someone s*** in it.”

(My coworker leaves me to investigate the ball in question. I walk over and get hit by the stench. It’s awful. I end up having to plug my nose to keep from gagging. I spray the ball down, put some kitty litter in it to clean, then leave the ball to let the litter do its magic. It begins raining, and I end up not being able to finish cleaning, as my break is early. Another coworker comes to take my shift.)

Me: “Hey, the rain’s letting up, but don’t let people use ball twelve. There’s feces on the seat.”

Coworker #2: “Gotcha.”

(I go on break, and return an hour later.)

Me: “Have any trouble with ball twelve?”

Coworker #2: “No, although someone said they threw up in it.”

Me: “Did you let people ride it?!”

Coworker #2: “Yeah, was there a problem with it?”

(We go over to investigate. Lo and behold, there is both puke and feces all over the ball. It’s mixed with rainwater now, making the whole thing a sloshy mess.)

Coworker #2: “I’m going on break. Have fun!”

(I quit a month later.)

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