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  • Just Won’t Leave On Christmas Eve

    | Chicago, IL, USA | Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (It’s Christmas Eve at 5:30. I just finished closing registers and am doing final checks while my associate straightens out some products. All of a sudden there is a loud banging on the door.)

    Customer: “How can you be closed? It’s Christmas Eve and I need a gift card now!:

    Me: “I apologize, ma’am. We have been closed for almost a half hour.”

    Customer: “But I need a gift card! Can I slide you money through the crack in the door?” *takes out money* “See?! Look! It slides through.”

    Me: “No, ma’am. I’m sorry our registers are closed. If you need a gift card that badly try the grocery store three stores down.”

    Customer: “But… but…”

    Me: “Ma’am, as I told you, we are closed. We want to spend the holiday with our family. So you can try the grocery store as they sell our gift cards in a $25 denominations.”

    (I turned around to finish my checks and the customer left, defeated.)

    Take Your Layaway Faraway

    | Henderson, KY, USA | Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (I am working layaway around Christmas at a very popular retail store. Our policy is if you put something in layaway, we need your license. That way if you decide to take it out and get your money back, we know it’s you and not just a random person pretending to be you. A lady comes in one day wanted to cancel her layaway.)

    Me: “Hello.”

    Customer: “Hello, I’d like to cancel my layaway.”

    Me: “All right, can I have your name and your license?”

    Customer: “I don’t have my license, but here’s my name.” *gives name*

    Me: “Okay, but ma’am, I’m going to need your license so you can prove who you are.”

    Customer: “Why do you need my personal information for such a stupid thing? I was never told about this!”

    Me: “It is company policy to tell each customer that to cancel, pay, or pick up their layaway, they must show their license. It is also written on our sign right here.”

    (I point the large sign next to her that has in bold letters that you need your license during each layaway transaction.)

    Customer: “You just put that there! I saw you do it! That was never there until just now!”

    (The lady storms off and comes back with an older lady and two kids. The older lady steps up to the counter and hands me her license.)

    Older Customer: “I’m her mom. Here is my license. She lives with me.”

    (I look up their address in the computer, and it doesn’t show up.)

    Me: “Ma’am, your address isn’t showing up in the system.”

    Customer: “Well, why do you need my license anyway?! It’s such a stupid idea!”

    Me: “How would you feel if, a few days before Christmas, you come to pick up your layaway and realize it’s not there, and all your money that you put into it was also gone?”

    Customer: “That would be the worst thing ever and I’d probably sue the company for giving my things and money to someone else!”

    Me: “That is the reason for us asking for the license.”

    Customer: “I don’t have my license with me, but you have my name. That should be enough.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. I can’t give it to you, or your mom.”

    Customer: “YOU ARE RUINING MY GRANDCHILDREN’S CHRISTMAS!”

    (She harshly motions to the kids, who actually seem embarrassed about the scene that is unfolding. The two women start to storm off.)

    Me: “Have a good day, ma’am.”

    Customer: “Yeah, you too, b****!”

    In The Firing Line

    | England, UK | Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (I work in a small supermarket in my small town. It’s near Christmas and we are fully staffed. I’m on my break after four hours of constant checkout work. I am in the queue with some food with a very impatient customer who is a frequent annoyance in our store. I already handed my notice of leaving in and am starting a new job after Christmas.)

    Customer: *looks at me* “I’ve been waiting for 20 minutes!” *it has actually been more like four minutes*

    Me: “Yeah, it’s very busy this time of year. Everybody does last minute shopping. I’m only going to have five minutes to each my lunch.” *attempt at defusing with a laugh*

    Customer: “Why are you not working? Can you not jump on a till?”

    Me: “Sorry, I am on my break. I’ve been here since six am.”

    Customer: “I thought you people were meant to help customers whenever they need? The poster says so.”

    Me: “I am sorry, but all the tills are being used.” *gestures to all tills* “And the poster says ‘ask a member of staff and we will try to help you.’”

    Customer: “I know you have a spare till in the back that you only use for staff. Can you not bring it out? *giving the b***iest look I’ve ever seen*

    Me: *with a sarcastic shocked look* “How do you know about our secret till?! I am only used as a decoy here in the customer queue so nobody can catch on to our super secret discount staff till in the back because I love to wait in a queue instead of eating my lunch!”

    (The customer then scoffs and gets served and turns around to me.)

    Customer: “I would wish you a Merry Christmas but you’re obviously not as educated as me to comprehend such words.”

    Me: “And a very Merry Christmas to you too, Mrs [Customer]. I can’t wait to serve you and your excessive amount of booze on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings whilst everyone judges you in the queue!” *smiles*

    Can’t See The Closing Time For The Christmas Trees

    | Lake Havasu City, AZ, USA | Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (It’s December first, and exactly at closing time, a couple wanders in:)

    Male Customer: *after hearing the closing announcement on the loudspeaker* “You’re closed?”

    Me: “Yes, sir.”

    Female Customer: “You CAN’T be closed! We NEED a live Christmas tree!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. There’s no one in the garden department who can operate the chainsaw, but we open at six am and—”

    Female Customer: “This is g****** stupid! It’s f****** Christmas time! Do your f****** job and find someone to help us, right now!”

    (I went to find my manager and to clock out. I don’t know if they got their Christmas tree but I know who made Santa’s naughty list this year!)

    Good Nature Has Bowed Out

    | TX, USA | Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (I have a seasonal job over the Christmas holidays at a store that sells decorations. The store normally has pretty cheap items for sale but at the time there was a promotion where all Christmas items were half off. However there was a policy where if an item was missing parts or damaged it couldn’t be discounted at the till, it had to have a special sticker put on it by a floor worker. A woman comes up to my till with just a set of what’s supposed to be 2 bows but only has one.)

    Customer: “Hey I really like this set of bows but it’s only got one even though it’s supposed to be a set of two. Can I get a discount?”

    Me: “No, sorry. It has to be marked down as damaged while on the floor. But with the Christmas discount it’s only $2.”

    Customer: “But there’s only one! It should be discounted even further.”

    Me: “Well, is there another set of those? That way you can get two bows like you’re supposed to.”

    Customer: “No, this was the only one I saw. Why can’t you just discount it?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I don’t have that ability.”

    Customer: *scoffs* “This is absolutely ridiculous. Fine, I’ll just leave it.”

    (She handed me the rest of her items and I rang them up. After I finished bagging them up and handed them to her, she grabbed the bow and hurried out before I could stop her. I told my manager about it but she was already long gone. The kicker? The next day I saw several of the exact same set of bows that were a complete set!)

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