I’m telling on myself in this one. I was working at a video game store in a large, busy strip mall. The parking lot was usually very crowded, so we had a constant problem with our customers parking illegally in the fire lane in front of the store. At first I would just politely inform customers they weren’t allowed to park there and they were risking getting a ticket, but only some seemed to actually care.

Then, one day, our manager told us that he’d been warned that the store could get fined for letting customers park there, and it could possibly mean us getting fired over it, so we really needed to enforce the parking rules. I never found out if that was actually true, but in any case, I wasn’t going to risk losing my job because customers were being lazy and parking illegally.

Eventually, I started to get a bit overzealous about it. Whenever I saw someone parking in the fire lane I would quickly rush out to the sidewalk so I could tell them to move their car.

For whatever reason, this particular week was really bad with people parking in the fire lane. During my last shift of the week, I was starting to get really frustrated, as it had happened multiple times in the first couple hours of my shift. Then, I noticed a huge vehicle pulling up and parking in front of the store. At my wit’s end, I rushed out to the sidewalk, ready to yell, when the coin finally dropped and I realized the vehicle I was looking at was a firetruck — the exact vehicle that the fire lane is meant for!

Fortunately, I caught myself before I blurted out anything stupid. The firefighters weren’t there for an emergency. It turns out they were just bored and were coming to shop for some video games to take back to the station house to play while they waited for a call.

They were extremely nice, and while ringing them out I admitted to how I almost yelled at them for where they parked. They got a good chuckle out of it.

My child has a health problem. Recently a lab has popped up in the US which has a very important diagnostic test offered as a cheek swab for 250 USD, whereas previously this was a very lengthy and invasive procedure costing thousands.

I contact the company to learn how I can get the cheek swab kit from them, and how I can ship it back, since I am in Europe. A friend from the US is coming over soon, so we decide that they should ship it to her. However, they are in Philadelphia and she is in Chicago… and the cheek swab needs to be delivered back to them a maximum of 24 hours after it is taken.

When I receive this bit of info via email, I start sputtering, “But… But!” to myself, and all my hopes drop. It’s simply impossible. But no, they have a solution; the person emailing with me says that he will personally drive to any closeby airport such as JFK or NJ, as long as I can find someone who will bring it with them, and take the sample from this person. This makes it possible, since my city has a direct flight to JFK, and I can surely find someone I know who will be going some time soon.

When I ask why they would do this, and say that I have never seen this level of service before, the man writes that he has a child, too. I cry my eyes out. He will be getting a nice gift with the sample, too.

My coworker is notoriously terrible at communicating with our boss if he’s going to be out for any reason, emergency or otherwise. Since we hired him, it has become an increasingly prevalent problem. My boss tries to coach him, to no avail.

It all comes to a head one week when he fails to show up on Monday for work. After hearing nothing from him for hours, I contact his girlfriend, who tells me that he was involved in an “incident” over the weekend and she doesn’t know when he’ll be back in. She does say she’ll have him contact us, though.

A week passes and we don’t hear from him. I do some digging online, and discover that he was arrested. He has been in jail for a week.  

After all is said and done, he is no call/no show for about ten days. When he does finally call, he tells my boss that he’ll need FMLA, family/medical leave. My boss tells him it isn’t working out and that he’s been terminated. The kicker? The guy says he isn’t surprised!

I’m a cashier in a department store, working at one of the registers near the exit door. I often exchange light-hearted banter with the customers, which most have no problems with. One cold winter day I had a young man come through my line, and his only purchase was a balaclava, a stocking cap which covers all of the head but the eyes and mouth.

During the transaction, I commented about how cold it was and it seemed like a wise purchase. He nodded but didn’t say anything. As I finished the transaction I jokingly said, “Now, I don’t want to read in the news about a robber wearing a black balaclava with a blue stripe!” Immediately, the customer froze and glared at me for a moment, then grabbed the bag containing his purchase and practically ran out the door, depositing the bag in the trashcan on the way by.

Oops!

A patient has called for an ambulance because they feel nauseated.

Once in their hospital room, they order two medium pizzas from [Pizza Chain].

They then demand a free cab ride to get home.