Crazy Old Lady 1, Bag Boy 0

, , , | Right | February 15, 2008

(I was a cashier at a local grocery store one summer. At 9:00 every night, it was the bagboy’s duty to clean the store… which included vacuuming the rugs in front of the automatic doors. One night, about 8-8:30, an elderly lady comes in and sits by the doors.)

Me: “Hello! How are you tonight? Do you need any assistance?”

Lady: “No, I’m fine. I’m just going to sit here.”

Me: “Okay, then.”

(She sits there until about 9:00 until a bagboy comes out with a vacuum cleaner. He proceeds to do his job.)

Lady: “AAAH! What is that? What is that horrible noise? I can’t take it! I can’t take it!” *Walks up to the bagboy* “What are you doing? Stop it! Stop it!”

Bagboy: “I’m just vacuuming the rugs…”

Lady: “Stop it! I can’t take this noise! Why are you doing this?!”

Me & the other cashiers: “…”

(She went back to sit down and didn’t leave until late. Our managers came out and forbade the bagboys from vacuuming while she was there. For a couple more times that week she came in at 8:00 and if some bagboy even brought out the vacuum cleaner, unaware of who she was, they got an earful about the horrible noise that afflicts her.)

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Taking The Young At Heart Thing Too Far

, , , | Romantic | December 23, 2007

(An 80-year-old woman and her husband come up to the cutting counter with a bolt of sparkly, orange, see-through fabric.)

80-Year-Old Woman: “Three yards please.”

Me: *as I am measuring:* “What are you using this for?”

80-Year-Old Woman: “I am taking a belly dancing class, and I am going to make my own outfit.”

(I stare, and the man looks everywhere but his wife.)


This story is part of our Dancing roundup!

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Would You Like French Resistance Fries With That?

, , , | Right | October 20, 2007

Me: “Hi, how can I help you today?”

Elderly Customer: “SIX OF THE ENEMY, PLEASE!”

Me: “…Sorry?”

Elderly Customer: “Six of the German frankfurts!”

Me: “Oh, right…”


This story is part of our Shocking Old People roundup!

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