I worked at the customer service desk for a “catalog showroom”-type store in the 1990s. This was a national chain store and had been around for decades. There were companies that would give their employees gift certificates for our store in lieu of cash bonuses. The reality was that their employer was trying to be generous and didn’t want their workers to be taxed on their “bonus”, but the employees were furious.

We could always tell when those companies had their Christmas parties because over the next few days, we would see an influx of visitors wielding gift certificates. Invariably, we would have a few people come in and walk straight to the service desk demanding refunds on the certificates. It amazed me that they all thought they had a unique argument for why we should give them cash.

I think my favorite was, “You don’t sell anything I like/need here.” We sold housewares, electronics, sporting goods, power tools, toys, and jewelry. I guess it’s possible they wanted groceries or auto parts, but they were basically angry that they didn’t have fiscal autonomy because their employer made the decision for them.

The same tricks were attempted each year. Once they were told that we couldn’t refund the certificates, they would attempt to get creative:

• They would buy a two-pack of D-cell batteries and expect to get cash for the remainder.
  • Nope, we’d just cut them a decreased gift certificate for the balance.
• They would buy something for the full certificate amount and then return it with the receipt.
  • We would issue the refund as a gift certificate or store credit.
• They would buy something for the full certificate amount and then return it saying they had “lost the receipt”.
  • We would issue the refund as a store credit, but additionally, it would be for the lowest sale price from the past ninety days.

The people would be spitting mad at us as if it were our fault that their companies made the gift certificate decision. It got to the point after a few years that I recognized some of the people, and they tried the same stunts each year.

My immediate family is spread out across the USA a bit, but we normally try to get together for Christmas, which is also a family birthday. This year, most of us will be gathering, but my eldest brother and his wife will not be able to join us. His wife cannot travel because of a medical condition, and her mother passed away earlier this year, so (for that and other reasons) he will be staying with her, on the other side of the country.

Because there are so many of us, we pick names each year, so each of us only needs to buy one present for one other person in the group. (Spouses/significant others buy each other additional things, generally.) It means we can each get one person something nice, rather than trying to come up with five to ten presents for all the various people in attendance. This year, I picked my eldest brother’s name.

His wishlist had a variety of things on it, including a very nice pair of slippers. How slippers could cost that much, I didn’t know, but he wanted them, and I wanted him to have the nice slippers. I went to the company’s website on Monday, and they were having a Cyber Monday sale! I didn’t think too hard about why slippers would be on sale for Cyber Monday; I just called myself lucky (and used the money saved to get my brother another item from his list).

I ordered the slippers to be sent to his address and went on with my day.

An hour or two went by, and I had a sudden, creeping suspicion that I had ordered the wrong color. I checked his wishlist and then checked my order. I’d gotten the size right but had missed the color he wanted. Drat. I immediately tried to get onto the site’s help chat to see if I could quickly change the color before they shipped. After waiting on a “two-minute hold” on the chat function for almost ten minutes, I dug up their help number and called in.

I waited a couple of minutes before a representative answered.

Representative: “I’m sorry, but because of the high volume of sales happening today, I’m not able to switch the order. The best I can do is place another order for you for the right color slippers and send a return label for the incorrect pair.”

I wasn’t happy about this. It hadn’t been very long, and I was mad at myself for not checking more carefully when placing the order, and I’m not wealthy or anything, so I wasn’t prepared to place another order right that second. While I was waffling, the representative said, “Huh! Look at that!”, and I asked him what was up.

Representative: “Oh, I just saw that you’re in Chicago, I’m from Chicago.”

He said it gave him a little flash of nostalgia.

Me: “Thank you for your time. I’m not sure what I’m going to do about the slippers, but go ahead and send the return label just in case.”

Representative: “I will do that! Could you stay on the line for a moment? The phone’s going to start ringing again as soon as we hang up, and I want to just finish making this note here.”

Me: “Sure, but I’ll need to put you on speakerphone and get back to work.”

Representative: “I’m fine with that.”

I put him on speaker, and we chatted a bit while he finished up what he was doing. When he was done, we said our goodbyes.

I thought about it, and — especially given the rough past couple of years, and the fact that my brother couldn’t join us — I didn’t want to be responsible for my brother receiving a mildly disappointing present. I knew it wasn’t a HUGE deal, but I wanted him to receive what he actually wanted and asked for, so later that night, I got back on the site and ordered the right color slippers to be delivered to him. I figured I’d send him the return label for the wrong ones, and worst case scenario, if he were to forget to return them or something, then he’d have two comfy pairs of slippers and I’d be out a little extra money, but I’d manage.

A couple of days later, I got an email from the vendor saying that my order couldn’t be processed because of missing payment information or something. I logged on to check and saw that the first order I placed had been cancelled. The second was in process.

I have no proof, but I think [Representative] circled back and cancelled the wrong one for me when he was able. I could be wrong, but I used the same information for both orders, so it seems likely, and it’s the option that makes me smile — that he remembered and cared enough to go back and spend time he didn’t HAVE to, to save me a little worry.

Thank you, [Representative], and happy holidays!

I was working online customer support for a Swedish furniture store. We received a customer complaint.

Customer: “I want compensation.”

Me: “Hi, can you please send over some more details?”

Customer: “My plate broke after being heated.”

Me: “I’m sorry to hear that, can you please pop over a photo so that we can look into this?”

The customer sent a photo. The plate had shattered and had a dark mark on it from something being heated on it.

Me: “Thanks for that. Can I please ask what you were heating?”

Customer: “I used it to move coal.”

Me: *Internally.* “Why?”

Me: *Not internally.* “The plates aren’t able to hold the heat of coal.”

Customer: “But they’re microwave safe. Also, the coal breaking burnt my sofa.”

They send another photo; it looks like a cigarette burn.

Me: “Unfortunately, coal is a lot hotter than a microwave. We can send a replacement plate if you would like.”

Customer: “That’s not good enough! I want compensation for my sofa.”

I spoke to my manager, we agreed on a £5 gift card. The customer later emailed in, getting a £50 gift card…

My wife and I purchase a new couch online, and we pay a couple hundred dollars to get it shipped though a major shipping company. We are told it will arrive sometime in the next two weeks.

A week after we’ve ordered, we get the happy news that it’s shipped, on the way, and will arrive sometime in the next five days. It’s a fairly heavy package split into different boxes, so I need to be home to help my wife bring it inside.

Wife: “Hey, I just got an email; the couch should be here tomorrow around 10:00 am.”

Me: “Perfect. I’ll let work know I’m taking a half-day to be home to haul it inside.”

I take a half-day and park myself near the window to wait so I can see when the truck pulls up. Unfortunately, the couch does not arrive, and I get the dreaded “Package Delayed In Transit” email. I’m slightly annoyed — I took a half-day for that! — but it should arrive tomorrow.

The next day, the couch does not arrive, and this time, we don’t get an email. The tracking information isn’t even updated; it still says the expected delivery time is 10:00 am yesterday. My wife calls the shipping company to inquire about an updated delivery time.

Customer Service #1: “I can see here that according to the tracking information, the package was delivered yesterday.”

Wife: “Where are you seeing that? The tracking information I have says it was expected yesterday but was delayed. I was just hoping you had a better delivery estimate for me, or could tell me why it was delayed.”

Customer Service #1: “I’m sorry, I see that now. I misspoke. The package was scheduled for delivery yesterday. I’m not sure why it was delayed. We can open a ticket to investigate that, and someone should get back to you tomorrow morning with an update or answer.”

Wife: “Yes, let’s do that; just in case the couch isn’t delivered tomorrow, then I already have someone looking into it. Thank you.”

My wife hangs up, satisfied. We get either a couch or a phone call tomorrow. Either way, there’s nothing more we can do at the moment.

The next day, no couch. No phone call. No email. Nothing. The tracking information has changed to say, “Was expected on [date],” but there is no other information.

Another day goes by, nothing. My wife calls the shipping company again.

Wife: “We were told to expect delivery of our couch three days ago, but it was delayed. We opened a ticket to have the delay investigated, and we were told someone would get back to us in a day. It’s been two days, the tracking information hasn’t been updated, and no one has called us with information. Are there any updates?”

Customer Service #2: “We apologize. I’m not sure why that’s happened. I’ll put a priority on your order to assure it’s delivered tomorrow.”

Wife: “Can you promise us it’ll be delivered tomorrow? I can’t see anything on the tracking information — it won’t even tell us where the package is — and it’s a pretty big and expensive purchase, so I want to be sure one of us is home when it’s delivered.”

Customer Service #2: “According to our information, the package is in [Our City] at our service center. It’s been scanned and processed and is on a delivery truck right now. I’ll make a note so that you’re one of the first deliveries.”

Wife: “Thank you very much!”

The next day, nothing. Again. No emails, phone calls, or packages. We’re now four days past the original delivery date, three days past opening the ticket for someone to contact us “tomorrow”, and one day past being assured we’d be the first delivery of the day.

One more day later, on day five, my wife calls again, and this time, she asks for a manager first thing.

Manager: “I apologize for this. I can see your ticket and the notes from your previous phone calls. Please give me a moment to investigate.”

Wife: “Sure.”

Manager: “Thank you for your patience. I can see here that the package was transferred from a truck to a van for the local delivery, but the driver ran out of time to deliver it yesterday. The original delay was caused by the shipment being in several different boxes, and we were waiting on one.”

Wife: “The last person I spoke to claimed they were putting a note on our package so that it would be one of the first deliveries of the day. That was supposed to be two days ago. Can I get an updated delivery date?”

Manager: “The package will be delivered tomorrow.”

Wife: “Not to be rude, but I’ve been promised that twice now. Will we be refunded our shipping costs for this delay?”

Manager: “That isn’t something we can do. Your package will arrive tomorrow morning by 8:00 am.”

We don’t fully trust that promise since we’ve heard it before, but I already have the day off, so I prepare to spend all day right by the front window. To our delight, the package DOES arrive! Happily, I go outside and begin bringing the boxes in.

As stated, it’s split up into different boxes. I bring in Box One, Box Three, and Box Four as my wife unpacks them. There is no Box Two, the driver is long gone, and the instructions clearly mention a Box Two.

My wife calls the shipping company yet again, and again asks for a manager first thing. This time, the customer service agent refuses to transfer us, insisting that she can help and that there’s no one to transfer us to.

Wife: “Look, this isn’t personally your fault, but the company has messed up somewhere and I’m annoyed. The package was delayed by nearly a week, and now that it’s finally delivered, we’re missing an entire box. Do you know where that missing box is, and how fast can you get it to us?”

Customer Service #3: “The box will be delivered by end of day today. I apologize for the inconvenience; our van did not have enough space for all of the boxes.”

Wife: “I would like to speak to a supervisor or manager, please.”

Customer Service #3: “There is no need. I have given you the information we have.”

Wife: “I would still like to speak to your manager.”

Customer Service #3: “I am ending this call now. Your package will be there tomorrow.”

And she hung up.

It took four additional days, three more phone calls, and six emails for Box Two to arrive, and when it did, it was COVERED in a sticky epoxy residue that smelled very strongly and was impossible to get rid of. Naturally, the pieces of the couch that were in that box were also affected and were ruined.

I contacted the seller directly and laid it all out, forwarding them the emails as well as pictures of the ruined box and pieces of the couch. They immediately shipped us a replacement box through a different company, which arrived in three days. I got a follow-up email from them apologizing for the hassle and assuring us that they don’t use that shipping company in our area anymore; they’d gotten too many complaints!

In the summer of 2012, I worked at the help desk for a large Michigan utility company.

Customer: “I didn’t receive an email I was supposed to, just a reply to it.”

Me: “Okay, can I remote in and take a look?”

Customer: “Sure, but it won’t do any good. It’s not there, and I’m an Outlook power user.”

That was my first clue that this wouldn’t end well.

I made the search bar visible and found the original message in forty-five seconds, right where it was supposed to be.

Me: “Here you go.”

Customer: “That wasn’t there before.”

Me: “It is now. Is there anything else I can help you with?”

Customer: “No, really, that wasn’t there before. You must have changed something!”

Me: “Yes, I did; I changed the search bar so it was visible and could be used to find messages.”

The customer hung up with a snotty “humph”.

Ma’am, the “power” in “power user” seems to need a recharge.