I’ve already ordered and am waiting for my food when I overhear employees talking.
Employee #1: “How many pounds are in a gallon?”
Employee #2: “I don’t know. Can’t you Google it?”
Employee #1: “My phone is dead. There are sixteen ounces in a pound, right? How many ounces are in a gallon?”
Employee #2: *Checks his phone* “128.”
Employee #1: “So, there are eight pounds in a gallon, right?”
Me: *Internal screaming*
My child has a severe developmental disorder requiring twenty-four-hour supervision. It’s very difficult to find workers able to meet their needs, mostly for playful interaction and adult supervision rather than anything heavy or medical.
My kid loves the support worker we finally hire. She’s playful when she’s here, but she pulls stunts like not showing up, giving three minutes of notice, being late, and even showing up on off days saying, “I wanted the hours so I’ll work now,” as we’re headed out of the house. She’s on her phone constantly. She adds hours to her invoices, believing that if she was scheduled to work and never shows up she should be paid, and if she’s “bored” and walks out early, she should also be paid to the shift end. She’s definitely not the brightest bulb in the box.
The day comes when I’m ready to fire her, which is hard because my child loves her for some reason. The conversation doesn’t quite go as planned!
Me: “[Worker], we need to talk about you not showing up for work.”
Worker: “You’re right!” *Enthusiastically* “I’ve been thinking about it, and I think I should have a raise!”
Me: “Why would you ask for a raise? I’m paying you a competitive hourly wage, well above the minimum. Besides, I know this might be diffi—”
I’m preparing to drop the axe, but she cuts me off.
Worker: “And I moved. Now it takes me longer to get to work—” *it doesn’t* “—so you owe me two dollars per hour more. That’s how it works. All employers have to pay employees to get to work. So, now I make [amount] an hour for twenty hours a week.”
She confidently quotes an amount nearly ten dollars an hour over the “going” wage, and twenty hours a week when she now barely shows up for three hours a week.
Worker: “It’s the law!”
She was gobsmacked when I fired her! Sadly, she recently got a job working full time with developmentally disabled adults at a local activity centre. Other parents tell me she’s known as “the one with the phone,” but the centre won’t fire her.
When they called me for a reference — yes, she thought I’d give her a good reference — I told it straight and the supervisor thanked me, saying with a sigh, “Well, at least she hasn’t killed anybody yet. It’s the best we can hope for, I guess.”
Sigh.
I visit a certain grocery store pretty regularly. It is the closest one to my home. This location has a lot of issues with their card readers. Sometimes it takes a couple of tries to get my card to run through. It doesn’t happen often enough to make me not want to go back.
Today, I cannot get my card to read at all after numerous tries. The person next to me is also having issues, and someone behind me is, as well. I call the attendant over to let him know the card reader isn’t working and to ask if I can move my items.
Me: “The card reader on this register isn’t working. Can I move my items to a new one?”
Attendant: “It’s not the reader. Our readers are fine. It’s your card. Do you have another form of payment?”
Me: “Um, no.”
Attendant: “Well, I don’t know what to tell you, then.”
Me: “Can I maybe move my items to a different one?”
Attendant: “Why? It won’t help you.”
Me: “Well, the guy next to me was having issues with his card reader and so was a woman behind me. Can I try?”
Attendant: *Rolls his eyes* “Sure. It’s not gonna work, but I guess, if you really have to.”
Guess what? My card worked with no problem. He mumbled something about how he didn’t know why it would act that way and how they never have problems and just walked away. No apology. I almost got a manager but decided not to. I was also too flustered to get his name to file a complaint later. Hopefully, his customer service gets better.
My mum visits her bank to exchange some English currency for Canadian. This is during a time when any Tom, Dick, or Harry can do transactions of this nature without having to sign in first. Unbeknownst to her, there is a $5 fee associated with currency exchange; however, the bank teller forgets to charge her. So, Mum gets her money exchanged, doesn’t get charged a fee, and goes on her merry way.
A couple of weeks later, Mum gets her bank statement in the mail and it plainly says that a “$5 Currency Exchange Fee” has been withdrawn from her account. She is very cross and calls the bank.
Bank: “Yes, that’s because our teller forgot to charge you. She remembered after you left, recognized you, and took the money out of your account.”
Mum: “Let me get this straight: if I’d been just somebody off the street, and you’d forgotten to charge me, you would have waived the $5 fee?”
Bank: “That’s correct.”
Mum: “So, because I’m a loyal customer, you thought it was okay to help yourself to my money without notifying me first?”
Bank: “Um… Well, when you put it that way…”
Mum got her $5 back.
This story has been included in our June 2020 roundup as one of that month’s most memorable stories!
I call tech support because I have no Internet. After we finish basic troubleshooting, this conversation happens.
Tech Support: “It looks like we are going to have to send a tech out for this issue. This will incur a charge of $70 which will be reflected on your next bill. I’m going to send you a text with a link to approve this charge.”
Me: “All right, I got the text.”
Tech Support: “Excellent. Please approve the charge and I’ll set up an appointment.”
Me: “Okay. It’s going to take a minute.”
Tech Support: “That’s fine. Please approve the charge.”
Me: “Working on it; it’s just that all I have is mobile data and the site is taking time to load.”
Tech Support: “Okay, I understand. I just can’t make the appointment until you approve the charge.”
Me: “I don’t have Internet. My phone is being slow. I am approving the charge right now; it’s just going to take a minute.”
Tech Support: “I understand. We can find another way to approve it.”
The website loads and I am able to hit the “approve” button.
Tech Support: “Oh, I see it’s been approved. Let’s get your appointment set up.”
Apparently, the word “patience” was not in the man’s vocabulary.
