The Bank Job

, , , , , , , , | Working | October 20, 2017

In my first real job, one of my tasks is to take cheques to the bank and bring back cash for the petty cash. I am given a handbag and am told I need to take my own wallet for ID purposes at the bank.

The accountant jokes with me, “Oh, if you get mugged, make sure you ask for your wallet back.”

I don’t take his joke too seriously until I am at the bank one day. I turn to see a guy watching the teller counting the money I am to take back. He then turns to me and gives me a creepy grin. I don’t think anything of that until I am a few doors away from the bank and turn to find him so close to me he’s almost touching me. I quickly dart between cars and across the road. He follows a short distance away, so I duck into a shop that I know has an upstairs exit into the next street. I sneak a look when I am going up the stairs to see him standing by the door I had entered. I run out the back door and through another shop before rushing back to work. Thankfully I had explored different routes and knew which stores had rear exits. My work only wants me to take one route to and from the bank, at the same time each day.

Not long after that, I move into a receptionist role and a new hire is given the bank job, which isn’t part of the job description. Her husband comes in to see the accountant and tells him that his wife is not doing the banking. The accountant agrees it is too dangerous for a middle-aged lady to do, but funnily had not considered it too dangerous for his teenage niece to do.

Statement Of Recount

, , , , , , | Right | October 18, 2017

(A customer calls me on the phone in a panic.)

Customer: “Why am I still getting a bill for this line of credit? I thought you closed it! It’s ten pages long! I haven’t used it. “

Me: “I did close it, but I know you had some fraud, so let me call card services to see what’s going on.”

(I call card services.)

Me: “My customer is still showing a balance on her line. We paid it. What’s going on?”

Card Services: “We show no activity, but that card did receive a large payoff a month ago.”

Me: “Well, my customer is still getting a bill with a large balance…”

(I continue to argue with card services for 20 minutes before hanging up in frustration. I call my customer back and say they show no money owed so that statement must just not be printing correctly.)

Me: “Can you read exactly what it says at the top?”

Customer: “’Statement of Accounts’.”

Me: “That is your monthly statement.”

Customer: “Yeah, but it says I owe all this money!”

Me: “That’s your monthly account transactions and balance, not a bill! You don’t owe anything.”

Customer: “Well, why is it so long?!”

Me: “I don’t know, but it’s the same as you get every month; it’s nothing new.”

Customer: “Okay, thanks for checking for me!”

(I just spent thirty minutes arguing with people to find out my customer thought her monthly statement was a bill. I ask more questions now.)

A Closed Open Policy

, , , , , | Working | October 17, 2017

(We have a company meeting at another location that digs into time that would normally be spent doing weekly audits of our ATM machine. At the meeting I ask [Coworker] to leave for our branch ASAP so that we can finish before we open. [Coworker] takes her time, and arrives 15 minutes after I do. I set everything up so that all she has to do is punch in her code and we can start balancing. Instead of assisting, [Coworker] punches in her code and then checks her email, applies lipstick, and logs on to social media, all while I’m frantically counting cash, balancing it against spread sheets, and strapping it to load back in. Finally I finish.)

Me: “[Coworker], can you punch in your code again?”

Coworker: *in the nastiest tone possible* “Oh, now you need me.”

Me: “You could have helped me this whole time! I needed help.”

Coworker: “You could have waited for me. Everyone knows you need at least 15 minutes to settle in before you actually start working.”

(We opened late that day.)

My Relationship With This Bank Is Over(Draft)

, , , , | Working | October 16, 2017

(Due to a bank error, an incorrectly charged fee, I have an overdraft fee on my account. They reverse the incorrect fee they charged, but not the overdraft. I call to have that fixed.)

Employee: “Well, if you had more money, it wouldn’t have been an issue in the first place.”

(She eventually reversed it, but I still went in a few days later to close out the account. I’m not going to deal with a bank or its employees who seem to think overdraft fees for their errors are okay.)

Ah, Democracy

, , , , | Right | October 10, 2017

(It’s the day of the 2016 elections. I’ve just arrived to work.)

Me: “Hey, [Supervisor]. Do you want me in the lobby or the drive-up?”

Supervisor: “Your choice!”

Customer #1: “Hey! You cut in front of me!”

Customer #2: “You just told the teller you weren’t ready! I am ready, so I will go first!”

Customer #1: “You dodo bird. Must be a [Presidential Candidate] voter.”

(The entire lobby goes quiet and looks at [Customer #2].)

Customer #2: “You know what? I’ll just come back later.” *calmly walks out*

Customer #1: “So entitled and arrogant. I just know he’s a [Candidate] supporter. Did you know they’re trying to rig the voting machines? Ha! Like anyone in this area would vote for [Candidate].” *walks out, still talking to himself*

Me: “Ah… drive-up. I pick drive-up.”

Supervisor: “Yeah, I think I’ll join you.”

Coworker: “HEY! Don’t leave me alone up here! This city has turned into crazy town!”

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