Sadly Fees-able That He Would Use That Language

, , , , , | Working | October 20, 2019

(I have to schedule a flight. I use my bank’s travel website to book through, since the terms of use claim to include free cancelation. I pay and receive an email which includes my confirmation number and a copy of the same terms of use. Due to a miscommunication between me and the people I’m visiting, I scheduled the wrong dates and need to change the booking. It would be best to cancel, get refunded, and schedule a new flight, due to the price differences. I have called the bank’s travel support phone number, which is the only way to cancel bookings.)

Agent #1: “[Bank] Travel, how can I help you?”

Me: “I need to cancel my flight.”

(He collects the appropriate information from me and mentions the disclosure about the call being recorded.)

Agent #1: “Okay, I can cancel this. There is a cancelation fee of $25; is that okay?”

Me: “Actually, that’s not okay, because [Bank] says cancelations are free.”

Agent #1: “Well, I’m not [Bank], I’m [Bank] Travel. The charge is $25.”

Me: *mocking laugh* “No, it ain’t, and I won’t pay it. I have an email from [Bank] saying that cancelation is free, and I can see that on [Bank] Travel’s website, it also says cancelations are free. Get me your manager.”

Agent #1: *argumentative and fussy* “Well, my manager is going to say the same thing! Why don’t you just agree and save us all some time?”

Me: “If your manager can’t do it, then get me your manager’s manager. I’ve worked in a call center, my dude, and I know my rights as a consumer. [Bank] Travel advertised free cancelation. I am canceling my booking. I am entitled to you refunding me in full. Period.”

Agent #1: *angry growl and sigh* “Please hold.”

(As he’s, presumably, attempting to mute his microphone, he mumbles a sexist slur which translates to “female dog.”)

Me: *laughs out of surprise* “I heard that, and I know you can hear me, and I know your recording system heard it, too.”

(He hangs up on me, so I call back and get an agent who is a woman.)

Agent #2: “[Bank] Travel, how can I help you?”

Me: “Can your system locate a previous call’s recording from using the caller’s phone number as a reference?”

Agent #2: *understandably baffled* “Uh, yes, usually there is no problem with that.”

Me: “Please have your manager review the call recording prior to my call with you. I can wait as long as it takes without any hassle.”

Agent #2: “Uh, okay, this may take a few minutes. Excuse me for a moment while I place you on hold.”

(Roughly ten minutes pass.)

Agent #2: “Hello again. My manager reviewed the call and would like to speak to you about your—” *paused for a moment* “—experience. May I transfer you to her?”

Me: “Thanks so much. Please do.”

Manager: *nervous and confused* “Hello, [My Name]. I just wanted to say that I am so sorry about this situation. I have no idea why… why that happened. Everyone here knows there is no fee for your reservation method, and even if there had been fees on your account, the agents on the phone would never have any reason for making sure fees are billed to [Bank] customers. Not to mention, his behavior was unacceptable and I’m so sorry about this.”

Me: “I don’t need you to apologize to me. I appreciate it, but when a person is wrong they should directly apologize to the person they’ve wronged. On that note, I doubt that he would, so we can skip it. About my flight?”

Manager: “Cancelled with absolutely no charges or fees; a full refund will appear on [Bank] website within 24 hours.”

Me: “And about the first agent I spoke with… I’m sure [Bank] would want to reconsider a rep like him, right? I’d hate for him to verbally abuse someone who, say, is in a worse mental place.”

Manager: “He has been taken out of the call system for the moment, and is unable to take further calls today. He will not represent [Bank] in any position that faces customers, but any other punishments aren’t up to me. Please excuse me. Have a nice day.”

(The call was politely disconnected. I got a full refund and booked the cheaper flight without further drama. If it’s “female dog” behavior to make a company abide by the contracts they use, then I will gladly continue to be a female dog.)

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, , | Right | October 18, 2019

(One of my jobs at my bank is to send cash by wire transfer. When someone comes up to do this, I have to ask them questions to make sure they aren’t getting scammed or sending for fraudulent activity. One of the most common of these is someone sending money to their “girlfriend” or “boyfriend” that they met online that needs them to send them money “to come to see them.”)

Customer: “I would like to send money to the Bahamas.”

Me: “Okay, who are you sending to?”

Customer: “It’s to my daughter. She needs it for airfare.”

Me: “Okay, that sounds good. What is your daughter’s name?”

(The customer then pulls out his cell phone and reads off a name from his text messages. This sends up a huge red flag that he may not know the person he’s sending to.)

Me: “Sir, you just read a name off to me. I thought you were sending to your daughter.”

Customer: “I am.”

Me: “But you just read me a name. Do you not know your daughter’s name?”

Customer: “This is the name I was told to send to. Are you calling me a liar? This is my daughter I’m sending money to.”

(He then turns his phone around and shows me his text messages. Above the name he was sent was someone requesting money, and above that were two texts from the night before saying, “Good night, my love.”)

Me: “Sir, this isn’t your daughter, and if it is, I don’t really want to know why you two talk to each other like that.”

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A Very Last Shift In Behavior

, , , , , , , , | Right | October 18, 2019

(It’s not long before the end of my very last call centre shift and my tolerance for stupidity is at an all-time low.)

Me: “Hello, you’re through to [Bank], [My Name] speaking. How can I help?”

Caller: “Reset my online password. Your stupid system blocked it.”

Me: “Can I take your account number, please?”

Caller: “I don’t have it.”

Me: “Okay, is this for a credit or a debit account?”

Caller: “Credit.”

Me: “Perfect. And is it a personal or business account?”

Caller: *tutting* “Personal.”

Me: “Let me just bring up the credit card system. Can I take your name and the first line of your address so I can search for you?”

Caller: “It’s [Caller] and [address].”

Me: “Nothing is coming back with those details. Let me just search the business credit card system.”

Caller: “It’s not a business card. Jesus.” *to person in background* “How hard is it to listen to what I’m saying?”

Me: “All right. Well, there’s nothing with your details coming up on the credit card system. Is it definitely a credit card?”

Caller: “No! Jesus Christ. It’s a debit card. Why is this taking so long?” *to person in background* “She isn’t listening to anything I say.”

Me: “All right, I’ll search the debit card system. Again, nothing is coming up on that system. Are you definitely a [Bank] customer?”

Caller: “This is ridiculous. Yes, I am a customer.”

Me: “Okay. By any chance is it a business account?” *even though she already said it isn’t*

Caller: “Yes! Are you stupid? I told you already that it is!” *to person in the background* “This idiot is the stupidest person I’ve ever spoken to.”

Me: *starting to see red* “What’s the business name?”

Caller: “[Business].”

Me: “Nothing is coming up under that name, either. Please double-check and give me the right business name.”

Caller: “F***’s sake. It’s [Other Name].” 

Me: “Okay, I finally have your account. Can I take your security number to verify you?”

Caller: “It’s [number].”

Me: “Nope, that’s not right. Try again.”

Caller: “Try [number].”

Me: “That’s not correct, either, so now I need to ask you some security questions. Can I get [details]?

Caller: “Is this call ever going to f****** end? It’s [details].

(By now I am completely confused and I’ve forgotten that she wants to reset a password. It’s almost 11:00 pm and at this time of night, 99% of calls are for lost cards, so I automatically assume that’s what the call is for.)

Me: “Those details were actually correct, so I can cancel your lost card now.”

Caller: “WHY THE F*** ARE YOU CANCELLING MY CARD?! Jesus, are you completely stupid? I want to reset my password. Is that too difficult for your dumb brain to comprehend?”

Me: “I’m sorry. There has been so much back and forth while I try to find your account that I forgot the call reason.”

Caller: “That’s not good enough. You’re a stupid f****** idiot who hasn’t listened to anything I’ve said. You’re a moron.”

Me: *finally reaching my limit* “DO NOT SPEAK TO ME LIKE THAT! I am not stupid and I have listened to everything you’ve said. You said it was a credit card when it was a debit card. You said it was a personal account when it was a business account. You said the business name was [Business] when it’s actually [Other Name]. You rang the bank without any account details or account information. And finally, you’re the one who doesn’t know their verification details. I’ve spent nearly fifteen minutes trying to find your account when this entire call should have only taken two or three minutes, all because you’re too stupid to know a single thing about your account.”

Caller: “Well, I, uh, just…”.

Me: “I’ve reset your online password now, and since you’re soooooo smart, I’m sure you’ll figure out how to create a new one yourself. Goodbye.”

(I then hung up on her. The password reset process is extremely difficult without help, but my shift was over so I never found out if she had to call back.)

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Lose Your Card, Not Your Manners

, , , , | Right | October 17, 2019

(I work in a call centre and I’m well used to abusive customers. Normally, I ignore them because I know they’re just trying to push my buttons. However, if a customer starts being abusive to me for no reason, I won’t take it for a second.)

Me: “Good evening. Lost & Stolen Cards. How can I help?

Customer: “Finally someone answers. I got to Spain an hour ago and I lost my debit card. You are going to cancel it immediately.”

Me: “Of course. Can I take your account number?”

Customer: “I don’t have that. Who brings their f****** account number on holiday? For f***’s sake, how hard is it to cancel a card?”

Me: “If you don’t have your account number I can search for you. I just need your name and the bank you opened your account with.”

Customer: “Are. You. F******. Stupid? I don’t have any of my account information because I’m not in the f****** country. Is that too hard for you to understand or do I need to speak slowly?”

Me: “Don’t speak to me like that when I’m trying to help you.”

Customer: “Well, I’m not the f****** idiot who keeps asking me for account information.”

Me: “And I’m also not the idiot who lost their card within minutes of arriving in a foreign country and now can’t understand that it’s impossible to find their account if they don’t give me any account information. I’m not bloody psychic.”

Customer: “You can’t speak to me like that!”

Me: “I think you’ll find I can, because I just did.”

(About fifteen seconds of silence and then…)

Customer: “My name is [Customer] and I opened my account in [Bank].”

(I found the customer’s account, and for the rest of the call he couldn’t have been more polite. He also apologised for being so rude and said he was just frustrated at losing his card. I accepted his apology but asked him in future to remember that the person he’s talking to is human, too, and it’s not acceptable to take his frustration out on someone who is doing their best to help him. I flagged the call to my team leader, and since I usually have a spotless record, she agreed to avoid that call when marking my performance that week.)

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That’s Cardly A Reasonable Request

, , , | Right | October 2, 2019

Me: “Good evening. You’re through to [Bank] Customer Services. How can I help?”

Customer: “Hi. I lost my debit card and was wondering if you can help.”

Me: “Okay. Can I just take your name, account number, and [security information] to verify you?”

Customer: “Yep, that’s [details].”

Me: “Thank you. Looking at your account, I can see a note here from [Branch]. They found your card in one of the ATM machines and it’s available for collection at the Customer Services desk when the branch is next open.”

Customer: “Great. I’ll collect it tomorrow.”

Me: “Well, as tomorrow is Saturday, the branch is closed for the weekend. Also, as Monday is a bank holiday, the branch won’t be open again until Tuesday morning at nine am.”

Customer: “But I really need my card. Can’t someone just go into the branch tomorrow and wait for me to come get my card?”

Me: “I’m afraid not. The branch cannot be opened outside of normal working hours.”

Customer: “I want to go drinking with my friends over the weekend. I need money.”

Me: “We can arrange for you to withdraw funds at an ATM without needing your card. Would you like me to organise that now?”

Customer: “No, I want my card. I don’t understand why someone can’t just wait in the branch for me.”

Me: “To be clear, you want someone to go into the branch, on their day off, and wait indefinitely for you to collect your card, all without pay?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “No.”

Customer: “But I need my card!”

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