Not Taking Account Of Your Account Of Events

, , , , , | Working | June 14, 2018

(This occurs about a month after my father passes away. I have been working to get various accounts closed. The one I’m having issue with is his phone carrier. Since I am not authorized to access his account, I have no luck until a monthly payment comes due. Before now, the workers wouldn’t discuss anything with me, understandably, for legal reasons. However, unknown to me, his bank account — which my name was on and has since closed — is set up to autopay to his cell phone. Therefore, I am finally able to get them cooperate with me a bit.)

Worker: “Ma’am, the payment for Mr. [Father] is due and it is [amount].”

Me: “Ma’am, I need you to listen very carefully. [Father] is dead. He died three weeks ago. I’ve been trying to close his account with you guys. I am not paying for a dead man’s account. His name is [Father]. His number was [number]. I even have his SSN and am more than willing to fax you a copy of his death certificate I am currently holding.”

(Line is silent for a few minutes.)

Worker: “Okay. Just a moment, ma’am.”

(Many more minutes go by.)

Worker: “Do you have [other service] with us?”

Me: “Ma’am, I am trying to close my deceased father’s account. To the best of my knowledge ,all he had was your phone service. Please cancel his service.”

(More minutes go by. I can hear her typing something. At one point I hear her talking and laughing with what I assume is a coworker. I am beyond frustrated by this whole ordeal, but continue to silently wait and try to be polite.)

Worker: “Okay, ma’am, it looks like I can send it back to his bank account.”

Me: “Ma’am, his bank account is closed. That is why you weren’t paid.”

Worker: *another long pause* “Looks like I can only send it back to the bank; you’ll have to talk with them.”

Me: *sighs* “All right, thank you. Is his account closed, though?”

Worker: “Yes, ma’am.”

Me: “Thank you.”

(I’m not sure what she’s talking about, so I go back to the bank and wait to speak to a banker so that I can clear this entire mess. I begin to explain the situation to him when there’s a knock on the glass. A see a young woman smiling and happily waving at him.)

Banker: “Hey, [Young Woman]!” *gets up and goes to hug and speak with her*

(I just sit there, floored by this display, but southern politeness kicks in, so instead of yelling at them I glare as hard as possible.)

Banker: *finishes talking to her then turns to see my glare* “I… s-sorry. Sh-she used to work here. She’s going to college. Uh—” *clears his throat*

Me: “How nice.” *explains the situation finally*

Banker: *types on his computer and cross-checks the account number, my ID, and my father’s death certificate a few times* “Okay, looks like everything is cleared up.”

Me: “I shouldn’t have any more issues? No more auto-payments on there?”

Banker: “Nope!” *wide smile* “And please, take this with you, should you ever want to open your own account with us.”

Me: “Thank you.”

(I tossed the pamphlets in plain view into a nearby trash-can.)

Gotta Give Them Credit For Trying, Part 2

, , , , , , | | Legal | June 10, 2018

(We have a woman spend a lot of money with us on a credit card. A couple of weeks later we get a notice from the bank disputing the charges. I am very panicked as it’s a lot of money and even though I am not the one who served her, I was the manager on duty and did help with the packing of her purchases, so I feel responsible. Amidst the panic, I am formulating how I would pay back the lost money to the company when the manager calls me into the office. She’s been going through camera footage.)

Manager: “I can see that you’re helping wrap. Didn’t you notice anything about the customer? Did the card look fake or anything?”

Me: “No, I was really only wrapping between my own customers”

Manager: “You can see she knows exactly where the cameras are; she keeps her face covered or turned away. Here is the footage where the signature on the card is being checked so I know that was done right. But we have no idea how to get her because she gave a fake name. All I’ve got is a few shots of her on the camera at the counter.”

Me: *finally thinking straight* “Wait a minute. Is the camera outside the door real?”

(We used to have mostly fake cameras but a lot were replaced by real ones.)

Manager: “Yes, I’ve seen where she walks in the store on it.”

Me: “Go to [time] on it.”

Manager: “Okay, done it. What am I looking for?” *right then a car pulls up in full view of the camera*

Me: “That’s her car. I just remembered telling her to bring her car to the front of the store to make it easy.”

(We watched as she got out of the car, her full registration number clearly shown. Last I heard the woman is now doing five years, because she had been caught doing the same thing before. She had also done the same thing at our other branches. The card was actually real. She used a misspelling of her name to apply for it, so it was the bank’s fault because they didn’t check it against her ID properly.)

Related:
Gotta Give Them Credit For Trying

A Little Dishonesty To Earn An Honest Buck

, , , , | | Right | May 27, 2018

(I work at a pretty popular bank in a small city. We’re really focused on good customer interactions, so I greet each and every customer with a smile. On this particular day a father and his three sons walk in and come up to my window.)

Me: “Hi! My name is [My Name]; how can I help you today?”

Man: “Hi! My son, [Son], found this 100-dollar bill on the ground! And I want you to look up who it belongs to.”

Me: “What?”

Man: “You know, the codes on the bills… I want to make sure it wasn’t stolen money or anything like that. Can’t have my kids handling dishonest money! So, yeah, just track it.”

Me: “Sir, I’m not able to track a bill. There is no way to find out where it was or who it belonged to.”

Man: “Oh, I see. So, it doesn’t belong to anyone else?”

Me: “Well, it…” *I think hard about whether or not I want to continue to deal with him* “No, it didn’t! It’s all yours!”

Man: “Great! See, [Son]? You have $100 now!”

A Signature Check Problem

, , , | | Working | May 25, 2018

(A family member with whom I have a joint bank account had a stroke a couple years back, affecting her handwriting. She received a check in the mail for $1.40, and instead of wasting time and gas going to the bank to cash it, she “deposited” it via her bank’s mobile app. It worked, so we thought nothing of it. A couple days later, we receive a letter in the mail from the bank stating that the deposit did not go through because “the signature did not match the one on file.” She’s confined to a wheelchair now and can’t just pop over to the bank to fix it, and I’m sure this bank knows this. The stroke also affected her speech, so I call the bank. At this point, we’re laughing because they’ve already spent 47 cents on a stamp and time and effort to tell us they couldn’t deposit a $1.40 check.)

Me: “Hello? I’m [My Name], calling on behalf of [Family Member] about a check we deposited that didn’t go through.”

Bank Person #1: “Okay. Let me get you through to the checking department.”

Me: *to checking department* “Hello? I’m [My Name] calling on behalf of [Family Member] about a check we deposited that didn’t go through. We used the mobile app on her phone, and the notice says the signature didn’t match the file.”

Checking Department: “Oh, if you had a problem with the mobile app, I’ll have to transfer you to our IT guy.”

(I’m transferred.)

Me: “Hello. I’m [My Name], calling on behalf of [Family Member] regarding a check we deposited via mobile app. We got a notice in the mail that the signatures didn’t match, and—”

IT Guy: “Oh, was that the one for $1.40?! I’m so sorry. I wasn’t paying attention, and the notice went through before I realized how little it was for.”

(He went on and on regarding how embarrassed he was, and how he tried to contact us, but couldn’t contact us. THEN, we got into a whole other conversation about how the phone number in their system was close to my cell phone number, but not exact. I told him the real number, but of course, he couldn’t just input it into the system. There was a form to fill out, and he could email it to me or fax it to me or. Finally, we decided that he could just mail it to me, and I’d mail it back. Then, we got back to the check. He said if we mobile-deposited it again, that day, he’d be sure to send it right through! I did redeposit it, but I’m still shaking my head at the amount of time, effort, and money it took to deposit a $1.40 check. Even if I did drive to the next town to deposit it, it would have cost me more in gasoline.)

Holding Up The Bank

, , , | | Right | May 25, 2018

(I am a teller at the bank on a very busy Friday. We have a line around the lobby, and we are short-staffed. The phone rings.)

Me: “Hello! Thank you for calling [Bank] in [Location]. My name is [My Name]; how can I help you?”

Caller: “…”

Me: “Hello?”

Caller: “…”

Me: “Hello? [Bank]. Can I help you?”

Caller: “Hello? Who am I speaking with?”

Me: “[My Name]. How can I help you?”

Caller: “My son has a problem with his account.”

Me: “Okay, are you on his account with him?”

Caller: “No, he’s an adult; why would I do that?”

Me: “Well, if you are not his account with him, I cannot give you any account details. Can I speak with him?”

Caller’s Son: “I’m here; you’re on speaker. My name is [Caller’s Son].”

(I have to ask security questions when assisting customers on the phone. I tell him this.)

Me: “Okay, I just need you to verify your full address and—”

(The mom interrupts:)

Caller: “Hold on a minute. Can I get a mocha frappuccino with extra whipped cream, a caramel macchiato, and… what do you want, hon?”

(I can’t believe I am being put on hold — while the lobby is extremely busy and we are short staffed — so the customer can order coffee.)

Me: “Would you like me to transfer you to customer service? You have called a branch location and I am one of the tellers, so I need to be available to the customers in my bank, as well.”

Caller: “Oh, no, we’ll just talk to you; we already have you on the phone.”

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