My company recently bought some at-home tests for a certain contagious illness. I am NOT a medical professional, but I have somehow been elected to the glorious position of contact tracing anyone who takes a test.
[Employee] comes to my office with his mask below his chin, sniffling and wiping his nose with his hand. I hold out a box of tissues and pinch my own mask tighter.
Me: “Pull your mask up.”
Employee: “I need a test.”
Me: “That’s fine, but you need to wear your mask while you’re not testing.”
Employee: “Ugh. Fine.” *Pulls it up under his nose* “Happy?”
Me: “No. Do it right.”
He makes a show of pulling his mask up properly and pinching the nose.
Employee: “Okay?!”
Me: “Yes, thank you. Read and sign this, please.”
I hand him the form everyone has to sign to take one of these tests. Basically, it states that we are not medical professionals and this is not an official diagnosis but more of a guideline toward the next steps. It also states that if the test comes back positive, he will seek a second test paid for by our company at a medical facility, and if it comes back negative, it is up to him to decide if he wants a second test, which the company will also pay for. He signs and tosses the paper back at me.
Employee: “This is stupid. It’s probably just a cold. [Employee #2] is out there acting like I have the plague.”
Me: “You can take the test at that seat over there and wait for the results.”
[Employee] does as he is told. He waits for the timer before looking.
Employee: “This is bulls***. Give me another one.”
Me: “It’s positive?”
Employee: “Give me another one.”
Me: “No, you need to follow policy and go get tested at a testing site. I can book—”
Employee: “Give me another f****** test!”
Me: “Do you not trust that test?”
Employee: “No! It’s probably pre-programmed to say positive!”
Me: “Then what makes you think the next one won’t say the same thing?”
Employee: “I’m not going to get another test.”
Me: “[Employee], you don’t really have a choice. Can you provide proof of vaccination?”
Employee: “That’s none of your f****** business.”
It is, in this case, because it’s part of contact tracing, and the time he would have to quarantine is different depending on whether or not he is vaccinated.
Me: “Okay. I’ll just submit this report to Human Resources saying you aren’t willing to answer.”
[Employee] sat in the chair, glaring and sniffling. He wiped his nose one last time with the palm of his hand and, without breaking eye contact, wiped that snotty hand on the arm of the chair before leaving. I called building security to escort him from the property and notified HR that we had a potential positive case and that he refused to answer my question.
He tried to come back to work later that day and several other days, but he was refused access until he provided a negative test result. He never came back. I read the report from HR and found that he was not only unvaccinated, but he had also purchased a fake vaccine card to shorten his quarantine period. He was consequently released from his duties at our company.
