(I work in the electronics department of a large store. I answer a call, and spend the first minute or two struggling to hear over the customer’s child in the background.)

Customer: “My friend gave me a game; can you tell me if it was bought from there?”

Me: “Do you have a receipt?”

Customer: “I told you it was a gift. Why would I have a receipt?”

Me: “Some stores give gift receipts. We do if you ask. Without one, there’s no way I can tell you if it was bought here. The same item will have the same UPC if it was bought here, or at [Retailer #1], or at [Retailer #2]. There’s no way to check.”

Customer: “So, how am I supposed to know?”

Me: “You could ask your friend.”

Customer: “You can’t look it up?”

Me: “There’s no way to tell if it was bought here without a receipt.”

Customer: “So, you can’t tell me if this was bought there. Ridiculous.”

I am sixteen, working my first job in a grocery store as a cashier, mere months after being hired. I am working in our express lane, which is attached to our deli and hot foods department, to make it easier for customers to purchase hot meals.

A rather gruff-looking older woman comes to my lane with a handful of items, including one of our ready-made sandwiches, made with meat, cheese, and typically lettuce and tomato. I am immediately on edge as the woman responds rather rudely to my greeting; however, I continue checking her out until we get to the sandwich.

She tells me she called earlier in the day and the woman at our customer service center told her she could get a new, replacement sandwich for free. The story is that she purchased a sandwich yesterday for her mother, and the lettuce in the sandwich was soggy and limp like it had gone bad. She provides no specific name of a customer service worker, though we always answer our phones with our names. When I ask her if she has her receipt, she gets ornery and says the woman at customer service told her she wouldn’t need it. This is not true; receipts are required on returns. When I mention to her that returns and exchanges are handled at our customer service desk, she gets blustery and tells me I can set the sandwich aside, as she isn’t going to get it.

As she leaves with her other products, she mutters about how she is never going to come back to this store again… because we enforce our very simple rules? Good riddance.

My boss comes to talk to me later. Apparently, the woman has called to complain about me, and my boss says, “Sometimes it’s just better to give the customers what they want.”

What is even the point of us having rules at all if we’re going to allow customers to break them whenever they want?

I’ve been working at the store for eight years now — and I’m a heck of a lot tougher about our policies now than I was then — and the way my boss said that still grates on me. She’s no longer working with us, thankfully.

(A customer walks up to my cash register.)

Me: “How are you doing today? Did you find everything all right?”

Customer: *abruptly* “No, I’m in a hurry.”

Me: “I’m sorry about that; I will have you out of here as quick as I can!”

(I ring up his purchase quickly and then wait for him to pay. He pulls out a card.)

Me: “If it’s debit you use the chip reader; if it’s credit you slide the card.”

Customer: “It’s debit.” *swipes the card*

(The screen puts up the message I just told him and tells him to put the card in the chip reader.  I also repeat what I just said. He ignores me and swipes three more times.)

Customer: “Why the f*** isn’t this working?”

Me: “Because it’s debit, sir; you have to chip it.”

Customer: “Why the f*** didn’t you say that? You’re wasting my f****** time! I told you I was in a hurry.”

(I’ve learned at this point to not argue with customers and apologize to him for my lack of attention. He then enters the wrong debit pin, so his purchase is denied.)

Me: “Sir, it says you entered the wrong pin. Will you try again, please?”

Customer: “Are you f****** stupid? You must be if you work here.”

(He re-enters his pin wrong two more times and I hesitantly tell him it’s still wrong, knowing he’s getting angrier and angrier.)

Customer: “What the f*** is wrong with you? You’re doing this on purpose, you stupid b****! Give me my f****** purchases right now!”

(His wife, who is apparently still looking around, walks up.)

Customer’s Wife: “What’s wrong?”

(His attitude immediately changes.)

Customer: *fake sweet* “Nothing, honey. I was just explaining to this young girl that she really should have been trained better before they put her up on the registers all by herself, as she obviously doesn’t know what she’s talking about. She keeps saying my PIN is wrong.”

Customer’s Wife: “Maybe that’s because we switched banks last week and you’re entering in the wrong PIN, and should apologize to her for being a condescending jerk.”

(He gets bright red and tries entering a different PIN, and this time the transaction goes through.)

Customer: *glares at me* “Nice to see you finally got your s*** together; you really wasted my time.”

(In a voice just as fake as the one he acquired when his wife showed up, I hand him his bag and apologize one more time.)

Me: “Sorry for not knowing your private personal bank information; you have a good day.” *huge fake grin*

(He blushes an even brighter red and snatches the bag out of my hands.)

Customer: “Whatever.” *stalks away, leaving his wife behind*

Customer’s Wife: *genuinely apologetic* “Sorry, sweetie.”

Me: “It’s okay; he’s not the worse I’ve had by far.”

Customer’s Wife: “Now I’m even more sorry. What’s wrong with people nowadays? If it’s any consolation, I’m going to burn his dinner tonight.”

(I am teaching a 12th-grade journalism class.)

Me: “For today’s assignment, I want you think of someone famous that you admire. They can be living or dead, as long as they are a real person. Imagine that you have the entire day to interview that person, write at least five questions, and try to think about how he or she would answer. Be creative! Here is a list of famous people to help give you an idea, in case you don’t have someone in mind.”

(The list contains a variety of people from history and the present day that most students should be familiar with, especially by the time they are in high school.)

Student #1: “Ms. [My Name], I don’t know who this person is.”

(I walk over to the student’s desk. To my astonishment, he is pointing to Albert Einstein’s name on the list.)

Me: *thinking the student is pulling my leg* “Come on, you know him! He was the scientist that came up with the formula E=MC2.”

Student #1: “Never heard of him.”

(I was shocked that even though I picked common people that are usually discussed in social studies and other subjects in school, these kids had no idea who I was talking about! The only names they did recognize were Dr. Seuss and Martin Luther King, Jr. But, they only knew MLK, Jr. because they don’t have to go to school on his birthday! They had no idea why he was important!)

My sister has never been a good cook; this has simply become a fact of life. These are a few of the stories that have come up over the years.

When I was about seven and she was around eleven, we decided to do something nice for our parents. We grabbed the cook book and found dinner and drink recipes to make one night: chicken pot pie and quality punch. My parents bought the supplies for us, and we got to work. Halfway through preparing the punch, we started to realize there was a lot of it. We looked at the recipe a little closer… It read, “quantity punch.”

My sister made brownies, but switched the oil with high fructose corn syrup. When we ate them, they were extra chewy, and she wouldn’t eat them because the eggs were questionable.

She tried to boil water, and a fire started. She calmly went to our parents’ room and woke Mom up, saying, “Fire,” as if nothing was wrong. My mom, dazed from just being woken up, had to have my sister repeat the statement three times, and only on the third did my sister emphasize it as if something was horribly wrong. The house didn’t burn down, though!

My sister went off to college, and in her second year, she was made an RA (resident advisor). They put her through all sorts of training, including what to do in case of fire. Halfway through the year, we got a call from her about how she was microwaving a cookie at the dorm, and it caught fire. She panicked, and her neighbor had to come over and put the fire out because she knew what to do when a fire happened with someone else, but not for her own room.