The Onions Have Stalled

, , , , , | Right | May 28, 2021

Customer: “I’d like my hamburger with extra onions.”

She receives her hamburger with extra onions but returns a minute later.

Customer: “There aren’t enough extra onions on it. I really want a lot.”

I dispose of the hamburger, as we can’t return an item to the kitchen if it has been touched, and I ask the kitchen staff to put extra, extra onions on it. I then need to use the washroom, and as I am not on break and the public ones are closer, I go to the ladies’ room.

As I’m in a stall, sitting on the toilet, I hear the door open.

Customer: “There still aren’t enough onions.”

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No Meat Between His Ears

, , , , , | Right | May 14, 2021

Late at night, my brother pulls up a third-party delivery app and orders a meal from a nearby fast food place.

When the order comes, he takes the burger and drink, handing some fries to me. A few seconds later:

Brother: “What the f***?!”

He showed me that his burger had no patty; it was just cheese and bun.

Thinking it was a mistake in the kitchen, I offered to help him get it fixed because he didn’t know how, but I soon discovered that it was actually a mistake on his part; he’d somehow hit the option for no meat by accident and didn’t read his receipt before accepting.

Nevertheless, I both called the restaurant and went to customer support on the third-party app, but both agreed that since he’d already gotten the food as ordered, they couldn’t refund or replace it.

This would have just been an unfortunate and funny story, except that next, my brother called up our parents, who were out on a drive at the time.

I overheard him speaking very loudly to them, complaining that the restaurant didn’t give him what he ordered and refused to fix it. I tried to speak loud enough to correct him, but they couldn’t hear me, and eventually, they told him that they’d call the restaurant and ask for a manager when they got home. I was so upset thinking about that poor manager who would have to listen to my mother complaining about something that wasn’t their employee’s fault.

Luckily, when they got home, I managed to explain what had actually happened before they got to that point. My brother still doesn’t understand why it’s his fault — he insists that the app he used somehow changed his order after he paid — but my parents knew it was his fault and saw the humour in him making such an obvious mistake.

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This Cashier Has Baggage

, , , , , , | Working | May 7, 2021

I am shopping at a large grocery store during the health crisis. Some cashiers want you to bag your own groceries, some don’t. Since there is no clear policy, I try to just watch what the cashier does and follow along.

This cashier has an issue with the register she is on and has to bring me over to another lane, so I can tell she is irritated from the start. She scans my items but collects them behind the plexiglass barrier so I can’t reach them to bag. I keep my reusable bags all inside one for easy carrying. As she bags, the other bags tend to expand out onto the counter and I can tell she is flustered by this.

Almost at the end of the transaction, the cashier mumbles under her mask to me. All I can catch is the word “two.”

Me: “Oh, yes. you’re right. I do have too many bags there. I could bring in just two next time to make it easier.”

Cashier:No! I said you could help by bagging, too!”

Me: “Oh, okay.”

By that time, she had finished bagging so there was nothing I could do. What did she expect me to do? Reach around the plexiglass to get the items and put them in the bags she had tucked away beside her, all while somehow keeping the proper distance between us? I realize she was irritated from the beginning, but she could have said something if she wanted me to bag my own stuff!

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Entitlement On Display

, , , | Right | February 2, 2021

I work in an art gallery, taking admissions and managing the gift shop. Last year, my predecessor in gift shop management ordered ten copies of three different books that are related to WWI and WWII, but, while nice little history books, aren’t really the kind of thing one usually gets from an art gallery gift shop.

I recommended books from the Canadian War Museum which had images from various artists focusing on WWI, especially Vimy. The timing would have been perfect since it had been a hundred years since the end of the war and many places were talking about it. Instead, she went with the three books from a local publisher; we only sold one.

The publisher gives retailers the option that one can return books for a refund, so long as it’s been no more than a year since they were ordered and they are still in sellable condition.

Since we are coming up on the end of the year since those ones were ordered, I make arrangements to return all but one copy of each to the publisher — keeping the single copies out for our Remembrance Day display — along with some other titles of theirs. Due to an upcoming expansion, the gallery gift shop will be moved to a different space in the building and reduced to about a quarter of its current space, so the more stuff I can move out of here, the better.

The books are in a box, taped shut, and ready for when the courier arrives.

A woman comes up to me and asks if I have more copies of one of the titles I have on display.

Me: “We do, but they’re in a box waiting to be returned.”

Woman: “Oh, I just know I won’t forgive myself if I don’t get a copy.”

I assume this means her friend is buying the other.

Me: “Oh, well, if you’re both getting one, I’ll gladly take one out for you.”

Woman: “Oh, thank you so much! I’m sorry for the trouble.”

Me: “No problem at all!”

I try to lift the tape in such a way that I can seal it again afterward, but it doesn’t work, so I just rip it off and trash it. After getting the book she wants, I grab the one on display and ring up the code in the computer. While this is going on, a man wearing a jacket with the courier company logo comes in, and I haven’t retaped the box shut yet. He waits while I finish with the two women.

Me: “Okay, who’s first?”

I look from one woman to the other:

Woman: “I’m buying.”

She holds out a 20$.

Me: “Oh, you’re buying both?”

Woman: “No, just one, dear.”

I look to her friend, confused.

Me: “So… are you buying one, as well?”

Her friend shakes her head.

Me: “So… just the one copy?”

Woman: “Yes, that’s right, dear.”

Me: “You could have taken the display copy.”

I say this in a “helpful” tone, trying to convey that I would have been fine with her taking our “last” copy.

Woman: “Oh, no, I never take items from the display.”

I maintained a smile, sold the book, put it in a paper bag, and handed it over along with her change and receipt. Then, I bid them a good day as they left. Then, I had to turn my attention to taping the box shut once more to hand over to the courier, all the while inwardly facepalming over the uselessness of having had to open the box in the first place, since she was only buying one copy, just because she didn’t want “the display copy.”

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They Totally Brew That Delivery

, , , , | Right | January 28, 2021

I’m a shift supervisor. I have just returned from a year off for maternity leave so I’m a little rusty with the addresses and any new places that have opened.

I’m currently running the till with a small line-up of customers looking to buy slices for our daily lunch special and the phone rings. It’s just me and my manager working trying to balance everything so I go to take the phone and place it on hold so I can finish up with the one customer I’m with.

Me: “Thank you for calling [Pizza Chain]; can I put you in a quick hold?”

Usually, customers accept this, and I can continue.

Caller: “Yeah, do you deliver?”

Me: “Yes. Can I put you on hold for a moment?”

Caller: “I’m at [garbled] Microbrewery; do you know where that is?”

Me: “Sorry, sir, can I put you on hold?”

Caller: “Ugh, yeah.”

I place him on hold, apologize to my in-store customer, and finish up with him. I return to the phone.

Me: “Thank you for holding. Can I get the address for your delivery?”

Caller: “I’m at [garbled] Microbrewery, do you know where that is?”

I later find out this place only opened about three months ago. I have never heard of it.

Me: “I’m sorry sir, Microbrewery? I don’t know where that is. I will need an address for the order.”

Caller: “[Garbled] Microbrewery! You don’t know where that is?!”

Me: “No, sir, I don’t. I do need an address.”

Caller: *Sighs heavily* “Ugh, I’ll have to go grab the address. While I do that, can I place my order?”

Technically, our system does allow us to go to the order screen and then back out and add the customer info, but I feel if this guy is going to be petty, I will, too.

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, my system won’t allow me to do anything without your information. I’ll need that address before I can do anything.”

Caller: *Another heavy sigh* “FINE. Hang on while I go get an address!”

Moments later, he supplied me with the information needed, begrudgingly, I might add. The rest of the order went off without a hitch.

Don’t call somewhere for delivery expecting people to know where you are!

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