(This happens in college. I’m doing some homework in my dorm when my friend and roommate comes in.)

Friend: “Hey, do you want to see the movie The Witch with me tonight?”

Me: “That’s the horror movie that just came out, right? Sure. You wanted to see it?”

Friend: “A little, but the professor for my mythology and folklore course said we can get extra credit if we go see it, so it’s mostly that.”

(That night, we head to the movie theater. When we get there, I see a movie poster on the wall of the building for “Deadpool,” a movie we’ve both been very excited to see, and see that the release date was over a week ago.)

Me: *pointing out the poster* “I didn’t realize Deadpool was out already.”

Friend: “Me, either. Huh.”

(We go inside to wait in line, since we haven’t actually bought our tickets yet. Inside, there’s another very large poster for “Deadpool” that we can see from the line. After waiting in line for a couple minutes, my friend turns to me.)

Friend: “Hey, [My Name].”

Me: “Yeah?”

Friend: “Do you want to see Deadpool, instead?”

Me: “I was hoping you’d ask!”

(Needless to say, my friend did not end up getting the extra credit, but she had no regrets about watching “Deadpool,” which we both greatly enjoyed!)

(Our cinema is showing a bunch of old films in the IMAX for a super-reduced price, for one day only, so we’re incredibly busy. Each screening of over 300 seats is practically sold out, so the other person on my area is called downstairs to help with serving. Even with every till on, the queues are 20 to 30 people long, and though they’re doing their best to be quick, there’s a pretty substantial wait in the queue. This is the story my coworker tells me when he gets back.)

Coworker: “Hey there. What can I get you today?”

Customer: “Do you serve hot chocolate here?”

Coworker: “Absolutely. Is that a large?”

Customer: “Oh, don’t worry. I’ll get it upstairs.”

Coworker: *confused* “I can do it here for you no problem.”

Customer: *having just stood in line for at least ten minutes to ask if we serve something* “No, it’s fine. I don’t want to waste your time.”

(Due to family issues, I moved around every few years when I was younger so I don’t really sound like I’m from anywhere. Over the years, I’ve watched a lot of American and Canadian shows and I have a fair few American friends, so sometimes I can unintentionally talk with an American twang. Customers often ask where I’m from and are very surprised when I tell them the UK. I try my best to smile about it but I can often get very self-conscious about how I’m talking.)

Me: “Hello there. How can I help?”

Customer: *looking at me suspiciously* “Yeah… Can I have a popcorn combo?”

Me: “Regular or large?”

Customer: “I want someone else to serve me.”

Me: *panicking that I’ve accidentally insulted him in some way* “I’m sorry; is there a problem?”

Customer: “Your voice is too weird. I don’t want you serving me.”

Me: “Too weird?”

Customer: “I want someone else to serve me.”

Me: “Are you having trouble understanding me? I’m sorry. I’ve been told I can be hard to understand sometimes.”

Customer: “Just get someone over here who talks normal so I can get my d*** popcorn.”

(I am the only person on this area, so there is no one else to serve him, and we’ve got a popular film about to go in so we’re expecting a rush any minute.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. The only other place you can be served by someone else is over there.” *pointing to nearby area that also serves everything I do*

Customer: *angrily* “F***’s sake! Just get me my food, and don’t talk to me while you do it!”

(I’ve had enough and honestly don’t feel like talking anymore at this point, so I just finish the transaction as quickly as I can and in silence.)

Customer: *having paid* “Get yourself one of those d*** speech therapists!” *storms off*

(I am working at a movie theater taking tickets while a very popular space movie is out. Sometimes we get people asking what time a movie might end because they are picking someone up.)

Customer: “What time does [Movie] end?”

Me: “What time did it start?”

Customer: *not paying attention* “[Movie].”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, what time did [Movie] start?”

Customer: *getting aggravated now* “The [Movie]. When does it end?”

Me: “I know, ma’am, but I need to know what time it started to tell you when it ends.”

Customer: “Why? Can’t you see it on there?”

Me: “Yes, but I need to know when, because we have had different showings all day.”

Customer: *starting to raise her voice* “Oh, come on. How many showings have you had?”

Me: “Currently, out of the fifteen auditoriums in this theater, five of them have been showing [Movie], and each of them have shown this movie at least four times so far today. So, what time did the movie start?”

Customer: “Oh. Well, it started at [time].”

Me: *long sigh*

(The foyer is getting noisy as customers exit a theatre that has finished screening, and popcorn is popping. I have just finished serving a lady and a few customers have built up behind her.)

Lady: *walking away* “Thank you!”

Me: *getting ready to say, “Next, please,” in a raised voice, but caught off guard by the lady’s “thank you,” I direct towards the next customer an unnecessarily aggressive* “THANK YOU!”