Excuse Me, I Just Gotta Make A Quick Trip To Pennsylvania

, , , , , , | Friendly | February 27, 2021

Jason Momoa is filming a movie in the town where my college is located. I am walking to the main tourist square to grab lunch and I am behind two young men around my age. I happen to overhear their conversation.

Guy #1: “Are you sure this will work?”

Guy #2: “Absolutely! Look he’s like seven feet tall, right? So we’ll easily be able to spot him. Then, we strike up a friendly conversation and invite him out for beers. Next thing you know, we’re best friends with Khal freaking Drogo, man!”

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Being A Nerd Pays Off

, , , | Working | February 22, 2021

I work in an office and we have an issue with a client. We haven’t received a payment, so he sends me proof of payment. I contact the bank, but they can’t find the transaction listed. 

When I talk about it during a coffee break, a coworker I barely know and who just started asks if she can see the proof of payment. I don’t know what she can do with it, but since it’s a very large sum, I grasp every straw I can get. 

She takes one look at it, and within ten seconds:

Coworker: “This has been faked.”

Me: “What? Huh? What do you mean?!”

Coworker: “This screenshot has been edited.”

She looks nervous and uneasy, but she points at the big bar on the top.

Coworker: “This bar is missing a few pixels; here, it doesn’t match up. This description is a different font from the rest of the text here. And this zero is slightly lower than the other numbers. There’s also a slightly different hue of white here and here. If you move a bit over here, you can see a few digital brush strokes.”

Me: *Baffled* “How did you spot that?!”

Coworker: “I… ehm… I used to do art on the computer. Pixel art… eh, game sprites. Just for fun. It’s kind of… my thing.”

I don’t get why she was embarrassed but I didn’t press that any further. She saved us a lot of money!

This story is part of our Best Of February 2021 roundup!

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They Don’t Know. But I Know.

, , , , , | Romantic | February 20, 2021

I work in a small, locally-owned toy shop in a little college town; however, we have a lot of down-to-earth people and families.

A couple comes in with three kids and immediately the kids go crazy, wanting to show their parents every single toy in the store.

It’s a small store but it’s broken into three distinct sections, rooms connected by walkways. We have a card rack next to the cash wrap that has all sorts of cards.

As the wife is being dragged by her kids around the store, the husband comes up to me.

Husband: *Quietly* “Don’t let my wife see; we are big Star Wars fans.”

And he slides me a card with Chewbacca on it that says, “You’re my chew love,” and cash to pay for it. I quietly make small talk with him about the weather and ring him up. I finish just in time as his wife and kids walk around and then grab their dad to go beg and ask for toys.

I’m chatting with the mom and she sees a card on the card rack.

Wife: “This would be perfect for [Husband], but don’t let him see this.”

She slid me cash, finished the transaction, and winked. It was the exact same card.

They finished their shopping, purchased a few toys for their three kids, and walked out, both chuckling to themselves about how clever they were.

This story is part of our Best Of February 2021 roundup!

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My Printer Is Definitely On The Dark Side

, , , , , , | Working | February 10, 2021

I am in the waiting area of a small office. The office manager is changing the toner in the copier.

Office Manager: “We meet again, copier. Now, having changed your toner multiple times, I have become the master. Do not try to resist me. Feel the power of the printing-things-correctly side.”

I am trying desperately not to laugh, but as she closes the toner niche, I call out.

Me: “Use the Force; trust your feelings!”

Without even turning around, she makes the Jedi mind-trick gesture at the copier as she hits restart. As it buzzes back to life, she grins at me.

Office Manager: “I used to threaten it, but apparently, it speaks Jedi!”

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You Can’t Hide Nerdiness Under A Uniform

, , , , , | Legal | December 25, 2020

I am doing a photoshoot at a comic convention of people cosplaying Marvel characters. There are a lot of us, enough to completely fill up the large staircase outside of the convention center.

As the shoot wears on, I spot two police officers circling the shoot in slowly tightening circles. I let the organizer know in case the officers decide to break up the shoot. Finally, while an awesome Planet Hulk cosplayer is mean-mugging over some lady volunteers, the officers approach the shoot and I overhear one say to the other: 

Officer: “Dude, I know we’re on duty. But I’ve got to get a picture of this Hulk. This is f****** awesome!” 

Cue about ten minutes of the officers acting like giddy schoolchildren as they took selfies with their favorite superheroes before going back to their rounds.

This story is part of our Feel Good roundup for December 2020!

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