Life Is A Game And They’re Already Losing
I work in a small, independent board game store. It’s a quiet afternoon when a couple comes in; the guy looks excited; the woman clearly does not want to be there. She ends up being the customer.
Customer: “Do you have anything normal? All these look… complicated.”
Me: “We carry mostly modern strategy games, but if you’re looking for something simple and fun, I can recommend—”
Customer: “—No, no, I don’t want to learn rules. I barely want to roll dice.”
Customer’s Boyfriend: “So… you want to play a board game that’s just… what… staring at a board?”
Customer: “I just don’t see why you’d want to play anything that takes more than five minutes to understand. What do you have that has no dice, no complicated stuff?”
Me: “We have Cards Against Humanity.”
Customer: “I’ve played that. It sucks. No card games!”
Me: “Hmm, the only thing we have that doesn’t have dice or cards is chess.”
Customer: “Is it complicated?”
Me: “Well, it can take just a few minutes to learn—”
Customer: “—perfect!”
Me: “—And a lifetime to master.”
Customer: “Ugh… that sounds exhausting.”
Customer’s Boyfriend: “Hun, remember this is for your nephew, not you.”
Customer: “Yes, but I’m trying to avoid him from becoming a geek like you!”
Well, doesn’t THAT sound like a healthy relationship?
She ended up getting an age-appropriate version of Monopoly, because it doesn’t have “monsters and trolls and s***.” Capitalism wins again!