(I work at a fairly large shoe store company where we do a gigantic “buy one, get one half off” sale twice a year. Very often we will have a pair of friends come in; each one gets a pair of shoes, then splits the total. They each pay less than they would have alone for the shoes, even if technically whoever is getting the half-off shoes is paying more than the shoes are actually worth. Usually, people understand this, but sometimes math is hard.)

Customer: “I need to return these shoes.”

Me: “I’d be happy to help with that. So it looks like you will be getting [amount] back today.”

Customer: “But I paid [amount higher].”

Me: “I see you did a split payment for a BOGO sale. You may have paid more, personally, but the amount paid for this item is only [amount].”

Customer: “But I PAID [amount higher]! Why am I not getting [amount higher] back? That’s how much I paid!”

Me: “I’m sorry that this wasn’t explained to you at the time of purchase, but you personally paid more than the price of these shoes. You paid for half the total, not just for your shoes. I can only return the price that was paid for these shoes because the other shoes aren’t being returned.”

Customer: “Where is your manager?”

Me: “I am the manager; that is why I can do a return for you.”

Customer: “The man who sold me this didn’t tell me that! You have to return everything I paid! I am returning my shoes and I want my money!”

Me: “Ma’am, I am returning the price paid for the item being returned. If you want the other $4, your friend has it because they paid less for their shoes with you both splitting the BOGO.”

When I was working as a cashier, especially around the holiday season when gift card purchases went through the roof, our boss told us it was mandatory to check IDs for any gift card purchases made over $50 if they paid by card. All of the local stores and restaurants in the area were made aware of a series of scams where people were stealing credit cards and running around town to spend the money on gift cards before the victim could cancel the card.

I had a customer come to the register and ask for a single $50 gift card, which is strange, anyway, as we were a sandwich shop; usually large gift card purchase totals were done as several cards of a smaller amount. When she said $50, I was looking directly at the register screen, punching in the security codes necessary to process a gift card while I asked her for an ID.

The woman went crazy at me for racially profiling her, and ranted at the guy standing behind her as she fished cash out of her purse and threw it on the counter it at me, then went into her purse again for her wallet. I told her that the ID was only necessary for credit card purchases, not cash. I said that she hadn’t had cash in hand when she made her request and I had assumed that a large purchase would have been made by credit card, so the ID was no longer necessary. She still thrust her ID within five inches of my face, all the while still ranting at the man standing behind her in line, who stared blankly at her the whole while with his arms folded.

The bills she handed me were two twenties and a ten. By management and corporate rules, I was required to check any bill over $10 with the bill-marker. The woman started screaming again when I marked the bills, and threatened to call the police on me.

Finally, the man who was standing behind her spoke up. He was a regular of mine who managed the game store across the plaza, and he told her flat out that I was doing my job exactly as my management required and that if she had come into his store to make a similar purchase he would have required his employees to take the exact same precautions that I did.

She demanded our names and stormed out with her gift cards, presumably to make calls to both companies complaining that we were racists. My customer friend assured me that he was going to talk to my boss the next morning and warn him about the lunatic woman and her behavior to save my skin. My boss never approached me about the woman so I’m assuming my friend’s call on the matter prompted him to watch the security footage and agree to brush off the crazy woman’s complaint because I was in the right.

Related:
The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 8
The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 7
The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 6

(It’s a few days after Christmas, so we have a lot of customers returning or exchanging items. A woman approaches my counter with a couple of items.)

Me: “Hello. How are you today?”

Customer: “Oh, I’m fine. I’m just here to return these. I have a gift receipt.”

Me: “All right, just so you know, we can only put your return on a gift card.”

Customer: “That’s fine.”

(Gift receipts don’t have the price listed, and I can see that the price tag has been torn in half to hide the price. I can still use the item numbers to make a new tag and get the price. Her total comes to about $18.)

Me: “Okay, so, your total return is $18—“

Customer: “No.”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “It should be more than that. My sister and I agreed to spend $30 on each other.”

Me: “When I entered the item numbers in the system, this is the price that I was given.”

Customer: “Well, it should be more.”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry, but I can’t give you more than what the system tells me.”

Customer: *scoffs* “You must’ve done something wrong, then. Give me the right amount back.”

(I hate being talked down to. I grab one of the ripped tags and the scanning device.)

Me: “Ma’am, whoever bought this left the item numbers, which is what we need to remake tags. This is the department number; it tells us if it’s men’s, women’s, house, etc. This is the item number; it gives us a description of the item — denim button-down, running jacket, etc. And this last number is the price that was charged.”

(The customer goes quiet. And at this point, I can’t tell if she’s mad at me for proving her wrong or at her sister for not spending enough on her.)

Customer: “I will take the card. Thank you.” *leaves*

This story is part of our After Christmas roundup!

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(I work at a popular craft and seasonal store. It’s the day after Christmas, and everything Christmassy is on sale at 66% off. We still have just a few trees left for sale, but some of them are returned ones, which are marked down to 80% off.)

Customer: “Excuse me. I need help.”

Me: *waiting for her to tell me what kind of help*

Customer: *glares* “I need help with a price over here.”

(I follow her to the trees.)

Customer: “Can I get a discount on this? See this right here?” *points* “Inoperable lights!”

Me: *noticing that it has been marked down from $1,000 to $200* “Oh, yeah, $200. That’s actually 80% off, so it’s already been discounted.”

Customer: “But it says, ‘inoperable lights’! The tree doesn’t work! Can’t you give me a discount?”

Me: “Well, no, it’s already been marked down to 80% off, and we can’t go any lower than that.”

Customer: “But it doesn’t work!”

Me: *trying to not get frustrated* “I’m sorry, we can’t go any lower than 80%.

(A tree is still a tree, even if the lights don’t work.)

Customer: “WELL, GOOD LUCK SELLING IT!” *nasty glare as she storms off*

(I am left shaking my head. Why is it so hard to understand that it’s been marked down already, and for a reason?)

(My first job is at a greeting card store famous, in part, for its yearly Christmas ornament collection. Not all the ornaments are expensive — the cheapest ones are about $10 at the time — but some of the larger, more elaborate ones or special editions can certainly get up there in price. One year at Christmas time, a man comes up to my register with several items, including two moderately-priced ornaments. After I ring his items up and I give him his total, he gets a sour look on his face.)

Customer: “Why is it so much?”

(I go back through his several items with him by price, including the ornaments.)

Me: “…and the ornaments for [price] and [price].”

Customer: “Don’t you have some kind of sale on them?”

Me: “I’m sorry, no. The ornaments don’t go on sale until after the holidays. Their prices are set for the season.”

Customer: “This is bulls***. They weren’t this much last year.”

(I’m unsure what he wants me to say; I can’t change the price.)

Me: “Well, the prices can change from year to year. Do you want me to take them off?”

Customer: “No. I’ll get them.” *takes his debit card out* “This is bulls***.”

(I ring him through in silence and he leaves. My assistant manager, having seen the tension from across the store, asks me about it. I relay the story and she tells me to shrug it off; he’s wrong, and he’s gone now. Hardly an hour later, the same customer comes back into the store and waits in line. Wouldn’t you know it, he comes to my register again. He takes the ornaments out of his bag and sets them on the counter.)

Customer: “I want to return these. I found them for a lower price somewhere else.”

Me: “Sure.”

(I process the transaction, and he leaves. My assistant manager comes up to me again and asks what happened.)

Me: “He returned them. Said he found them cheaper somewhere else.”

Assistant Manager: “Well, that’s interesting, because nobody else is licensed to sell them, and the company sets the price.”

(She walked away laughing. Guess he thought he’d one-upped us by thinking we’d missed out on a sale. I wish customers like him realized we really couldn’t care less, and certainly don’t take it personally, if they return things!)