I was working in a fast food restaurant. It was too busy for fries to sit, so of course, they would be hot.
Customer: “Excuse me! My fries are cold!”
Nothing I said would change her mind, until…
Me: “Ma’am, the only way you could get your fries hotter than they are would be to set them on fire.”
She had no choice but to accept her fries.
I’m shopping at a big box retail store where employees wear red shirts and jeans or khaki pants. I can’t find an item on my list, so I approach a man who appears to be in his early or mid-twenties and is wearing a red shirt and khaki pants.
Me: “Excuse me, sir, are you an employee?”
Man: *With a smirk* “Nope. I’m not.”
Me: “Oh, my bad. I saw the red shirt and khakis and figured I would ask. Have a nice day.”
Man: *Still smirking* “Yeah, that’s what you get for assuming things like an idiot. You know what they say about assuming.”
Me: *Not able to help myself* “Yep. You and me both. You’re the one dressed exactly like a [Store] employee. Don’t be surprised if I’m not the only one who asks you for help.”
Man: “If customers like you had half a brain, I could do my shopping in peace. Just because someone wears the same style of clothes…”
Before things go any further, an actual employee rounds the corner into the aisle we’re in.
Employee: “[MAN]! GET OUT NOW OR WE’LL CALL THE POLICE AGAIN!”
The man, still smirking, scampers off, and the employee turns to me.
Employee: “Sir, I am so sorry about. That guy likes to impersonate employees and then make fun of people who fall for it. We’ve banned him from the store, but unfortunately, we never have enough employees to keep an eye on the door, so he keeps sneaking in.”
Me: “Wow. Wonder what’s up with his head if that’s his idea of fun.”
Employee: “Tell me about it. Anyway, is there anything you need help with?”
The actual employee was very helpful, and I never did see the impersonator again.
If a customer brings rolled coins in, we have to break them open and run them through the coin machine due to people putting slugs, or fake coins, in their rolls. A customer walks in with two rolls of quarters, which are worth $20 total.
Customer: “Can I just get a $20 for this?”
Me: “Sure thing. Let me run these through the machine.”
Customer: “They’re all quarters, and it’s $20, I promise. I just didn’t want to bring in a bag of coins.”
Me: “I understand, but we have to unroll and count them.”
Customer: “What, you don’t trust me?”
Me: “Bank rules, sir.”
He rolls his eyes as I head over to the coin machine. I break open both rolls and discover multiple slugs, pennies, and even a quarter-sized button. I run the rest of the coins and head back to my window.
Me: “Okay, your total is $15.”
Customer: “What?! It’s exactly $20!”
I place the slugs and button on the counter and stare at him. He turns red.
Me: “How would you like your cash back?”
Customer: *Defeated* “Three fives, please…”
I work in the office of a major insurance company, in the home department. I take a call that starts out fairly normal.
Caller: “Can you tell me if my TV is covered if I drop it?”
Usually, this means that the customer has dropped their TV but isn’t sure it’s covered. I pull up their policy.
Me: “Yes, I can confirm that you have accidental damage on your policy.”
The next sound on the line is an almighty crash: the sound of a television being dropped. There is another voice in the room talking to the caller.
Other Voice: “Does it look broken enough?”
Caller: “No, drop it again.”
Second almighty crash. I can hardly believe what I have heard.
Caller: “Oh, s***! The phone!”
The customer swiftly hangs up. Just a couple of minutes later, they phone again.
Caller: “Hello, [Insurance Company]? I just dropped my TV.”
Me: *In my politest tone* “Yes, madam, I heard; I was the agent who took your last call.”
Caller: “I want to claim on my policy.”
Me: “No, madam, you do not want to claim on your policy, not after what I just heard. All our calls are recorded.”
Caller: “No, I WANT TO CLAIM!”
Me: “Madam, before you decide to do that, I am going to send you, free of charge, a recording of your last call. You may then decide whether or not to go ahead with your claim.”
The recording was burned onto a CD and sent out to the customer. Oddly enough, she decided not to proceed with her claim.
I take a tour of an apartment complex, and everything looks above-board to me. Several staff are in the office, and the tour itself is very professional. [Manager] tells me the rate for a one-bedroom, and I say I’ll need to think about it. I tour a few other complexes. Two days later, I give the first complex a call in the morning.
Me: “I’d like to come in and sign a lease. Would that be possible today?”
Staff Member: “Oh, yes! You can come in at any time.”
Me: “Great! And it’s $575 for a one-bedroom, right?”
Staff Member: “Oh, it’s actually $605 for a one-bedroom.”
This is the first red flag. I decide to go in, anyway. When I get there, it’s mid-afternoon, and [Staff Member] is the only one in the office. She is running between phones and trying to help tenants who come in with issues while I’m there. I end up being there for about half an hour, during which time no other staff makes an appearance.
She gives me a blank application to fill out, and I ask about the price hike. She has to hunt around for a price list and explains that the rate increases with each day that passes, which is the first time I’ve heard this. She also mentions that the rate is now $625. While she helps a tenant, I look over the application. It is generic, with no details about the specific unit I’d be renting.
Staff Member: “If you just sign that at the bottom, I’ll make sure my manager gets that and gives you a call.”
Me: “I’d prefer not to sign a blank form. The monthly rate isn’t even on here yet.”
Staff Member: “Oh, it’ll be $625. It should be fine.”
Me: “Yeah, I’d still prefer for that to be written on the form before I sign it.” *Stands up* “I’m going to have to get some info from my co-signer, too, before I finish this.”
I did not go back.
