Unfiltered Story #116522

, , | Unfiltered | July 20, 2018

A man comes into the store with his two children, a girl of about five and a boy around two. As he’s paying for their candy, the boy comes around the register so that he can see me (since he can’t see over the counter).

Boy: “I stinky!”
He pronounces it “sting”-y, but I can smell his diaper from where I’m standing, so it’s not hard to figure out what he means.
Me: *laughing* “You’re stinky?”
Boy: *proudly* “I pooing!”

Do You Want Songs? Because This Is How You Get Songs

, , , , , , , | Right | July 18, 2018

(A group of three teens — a boy and two girls — come into the store. The girls are singing, much to the boy’s annoyance.)

Girls: *singing* “Hiiighway to the danger zone!”

Boy: “No! Stop it!”

Girls & Me: *singing* “Riiide into the danger zooone!”

Girl #1: “See?! She gets it!”

(The boy makes frustrated noises as they browse the store.)

Me: *stage whisper* “Lana! Lanaaa… Danger zone!”

Girl #2: *pointing at me* “I like this one. This one’s cool.”

Do Not Put THAT On The Butt!

, , , , | Right | May 14, 2018

(Having grown up outside of “Cajun Country,” I often have trouble understanding customers that come through the store. This lady’s accent is particularly thick, and I have no one who grew up locally to ask for help.)

Customer: “I’m lookin’ for taco potter.”

Me: *getting a lot of strange mental pictures* “Taco potter?”

Customer: “Yeah. Y’know, taco potter.” *she mimes shaking something*

Me: “Do you mean… taco powder?”

Customer: “That’s what I said! Taco potter!”

(I take her to the seasoning section and show her packets of taco seasoning.)

Customer: *getting agitated* “No! Taco potter! Taco potter!” *emphatically mimes shaking something out of a jar*

Me: “I… um… I’m not sure what—”

Customer: “Taco potter! Like you put on a baby’s butt!”

Me: “Oh, talcum powder!”

Customer: “Yes! Good lord! Taco potter!”

(Why couldn’t she just say, “like you put on a baby’s butt,” in the first place?)

That’s A Hard Pass

, , , , , | Right | May 14, 2018

(I work in a local drugstore very close to the college football stadium. We do not sell alcohol of any kind. On a game day, a coworker and I spot a lady walking down the center aisle, wearing a team sweatshirt and looking lost.)

Me: “Excuse me, can we help you find something?”

Customer: “Yeah, where’s y’all’s beer?”

Me: “Oh, sorry, we don’t sell beer.”

Customer: “You sell hard liquor but you don’t sell beer?!”

Coworker: “Ma’am, if we sold hard liquor I’d have a lot more fun at this job.”

A Lax Understanding Of Tax, Part 2

, , , , , , | Right | March 24, 2018

(I’m the customer in this story. I’ve bought some clothes during a sale, but the price the cashier gives me is almost ten dollars more than I was expecting. I don’t want to cause a fuss without reason, so I pay, but I immediately inspect the receipt, and spot the problem right away.)

Me: “Oh, yeah… Taxes are a thing that exist, aren’t they?”

Cashier: *laughing*

Me: “Thanks! Have a good day!”

A Lax Understanding Of Tax

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