No Rest Even In The Restroom

, , , , , | Friendly | March 15, 2018

(I’m an 18-year-old female. I go to a party at the house of some friends. It’s a very family-friendly party. There are people of all ages there including lots of kids. There is no alcohol, but there is lots of good food. When I arrive, I warmly greet various friends, including a man much older than me. We’re not close friends, but we do know each other from previous encounters. He makes small talk with me as we both move through the house. I’m in a good mood, enjoying the relaxed atmosphere of the party, and smiling as we talk. I’m headed for a hallway with a bathroom, and I assume he’s heading for the nearby kitchen, where the biggest crowd of people are helping themselves to food. But as I start to enter the bathroom, he’s right on my heels.)

Me: “Oh, were you going in here? I’m sorry.”

(I step back away from the door.)

Man: “No, I’m going in there with you.”

Me: *taken aback* “Um, why?”

Man: “In case you needed help.”

(I am flabbergasted for a moment, and then creeped out, and then angry.)

Me: “I don’t need help peeing, thanks.”

Man: “Are you sure?”

Me: *feeling really angry now* “Yeah. I’m sure.”

(I closed the door with me inside the bathroom and him outside it. I locked the door. If you’re ever in a situation where an old man mistakes your friendly demeanor for flirting, don’t do what I did: lock yourself alone in a bathroom until you calm down and then spend the rest of the party avoiding that old man without telling anyone what happened. Thankfully, he seemed to be embarrassed and avoided me as much as I did him for the rest of the party. Looking back, years later with more life experience, I know now how lucky I was that day, and that I should have immediately gone looking for the hosts of the party for help.)

Taking A Different View On The Interview

, , , , , , , | Working | March 6, 2018

(I’ve come in for a job interview. The manager seems to like me and keeps asking me questions for 20 minutes, even though I don’t have previous experience in the job. The interview is wrapping up, and I feel like it’s gone pretty well.)

Manager: “Well, unfortunately, I’ve received an application from someone with previous experience doing this exact sort of work, and for that reason, he’s more qualified for the position. But if the other person hadn’t applied, I would definitely have hired you; I feel you could perform this job very well.”

Me: *upset, but plastering on a smile as best I can* “Oh. Well, thank you, anyway. Would it be possible for you to keep my resume on file, in case an opening comes up?”

Manager: “Oh, yes, of course.”

Me: “Thanks. I appreciate it.”

(We shake hands, and I get up and head for the door.)

Manager: “You know, if you manage to get experience somewhere else, please do feel free to come back and apply again.”

(I wish I had just smiled and given her a polite promise to do just that, but I was so surprised by her gall that I ended up making an involuntary, “Are you kidding me?” face, instead.)

Dropping Off To Sleep

, , , , , | Learning | March 5, 2018

(I volunteer to bring my friend’s teenage children to school one morning. I’ve dropped the youngest at junior high and am now going to drop off the oldest.)

Me: “Well, that was a confusing drop-off. At least I know where to drop you off.”

Oldest: “Yeah, Mrs. [My Name], at your house so I can go back to sleep.”

Me: “Nice try, kid, but you have to go to school. ‘A’ for effort, though.”

Can’t Get Pregnant, Or Any Sympathy

, , , , , , | Friendly | March 4, 2018

(I’m recently married and struggling to get pregnant. I thought I was pregnant, but was just under such extreme stress, I missed a period. This occurs two weeks after I find out I’m not pregnant. I am talking to two coworkers I know really well. I tend to have a dark sense of humor, and if I don’t laugh about bad situations, I’ll cry.)

Me: “Well, at least I no longer need condoms! I can’t get knocked up, anyway!”

(We all laugh.)

Coworker #1: “Seriously, though, what’re the doctors saying?”

(Before I can even say anything:)

Coworker #2: “Well, you need to suck it up. My sister can’t get pregnant, either. Neither can my sister-in-law. You’re not special.”

([Coworker #1] and I just stared at her. I go out of my way to avoid talking to her now that I don’t work there. It’s six months later, and I’m still not pregnant, but we’re still trying!)

The Attention Span Of Kids

, , , , | Right | January 27, 2018

Customer: “I’d like a kid’s burrito bowl, please.”

Me: “Well, we don’t actually have a kid’s burrito bowl. I can make you a burrito bowl, but understand that it is not going to be any cheaper.”

Customer: “Yes, I understand. That’s fine.”

(I make the bowl, and my coworker rings up the customer.)

Coworker: “All right, so I have a chicken burrito, and a chicken burrito bowl, is that correct?”

Customer: “It was a kid’s burrito bowl.”

Coworker: “We just have one kind of burrito bowl, ma’am.”

Customer: “What?!”

(At this point I had to go serve other customers, so I didn’t hear the rest of the conversation, but it did take quite a while for the customer to pay and leave.)

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