I work in an OBGYN office, often answering phones and directing patients’ messages to doctors. To make sure the right patient’s chart is attached to the message, I ask for a few identifiers. One day, a patient’s husband calls.

Me: “Thank you for calling [Office]. How can I help you?”

Husband: “My wife wants me to send a message to her doctor. She’s busy with the baby and asked me to call.”

Me: “Sure; what’s your wife’s name and date of birth?”

Husband: “[Wife] and [date last year].”

Me: “Can you repeat her date of birth?”

Husband: “Oh, I gave you our baby’s birth date! No, my wife’s is [date twenty-five or thirty years ago]. My wife’s an adult.”

Me: “Great, I see her profile here, so you’ve called the right office. What message can I send her doctor?”

Husband: “[Message]. Sorry about the date mixup… I swear I didn’t marry a baby.”

A few hours later, he calls back.

Me: “Thank you for calling [Office]. How can I help you?”

Husband: “Hi, this is the man with the child bride. We missed the doctor’s call; can we talk to her?”

Our office currently prescreens people who come in by asking them pertinent questions and reminding them to wear a mask to their appointment, where we will take their temperature.

Patient: “Hi, my name is [Patient]; I’m here for my 2:00 appointment.”

Me: “Did you bring your mask, ma’am?”

Patient: “I didn’t know I needed one.”

We have her marked as prescreened, so I know she was reminded.

Me: “That’s okay; we have extra masks so I can give you one to wear.”

I hand her one and wait for her to put it on, but she just stands there.

Me: “Ma’am, if you’ll put the mask on, I can continue checking you in.”

The patient makes a face, but puts it on.

Patient: “All my information is the same.”

Me: “Okay, and your cell phone is [number]? Okay, I have you checked in. If you’ll have a seat in your vehicle, a nurse will call you in when we have a room ready.”

Patient: “In my car? You want me to sit outside in my car?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. We want to limit our lobby to elderly to help against extra contact. We also suggest people call from their vehicles to speed the process and make it easier.”

We would have told her this when we called to prescreen her, as well.

Me: “If you don’t have AC, then we understand if you need to sit in here.”

Patient: “Yes, I have AC!”

She sits down in the lobby anyway, and we get a large influx of people coming in and out for their appointments. At one point, she comes back to the window.

Patient: “How soon is my appointment? I’ve been here for twenty minutes already and there’s been a ton of people going through here.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, that’s why we suggest patients sit in their vehicles. You have two others in front of you, so if you want to sit out there, we can help you limit your contact with others and call you in when we’re ready, okay?”

She sits down again and waits until it’s her turn to go back, which is almost another thirty minutes later, and only ten minutes past her appointment.

Patient: *As she passes me* “You should have told me you were going to have so many people in the lobby. I didn’t feel safe at all. Next time, tell me to sit in my car.”

I work at a museum. We recently installed a virtual reality exhibit guests can pay extra to try. Two guests walk in.

Me: “Hello! Let me know if you guys have questions or want to buy tickets.”

They do not acknowledge me and keep walking toward the arcade setup.

Coworker: “Hello! Let me know if you guys have questions.”

They do not acknowledge him, either, walk straight into an arcade bay, and start fiddling with the equipment. 

Coworker: “Hey, did you all want to buy tickets?”

Guest: “You have to buy tickets? I wish we’d known that!”

I work for an organization that is commonly mistaken as a government agency. This person called three times this morning. The calls were almost identical.

Me: “Good morning, [My Name] speaking.”

Caller: “Hi there. I was wondering if you have an [Officer Title] there?”

Me: “No, I’m sorry. The [Officer Title] works for the [Government Agency]. Would you like their phone number?”

Caller: “No, no. I just want to confirm. I’m writing an article. You don’t have an [Officer Title] there?”

Me: “No, we don’t. He works for [Government Agency].”

Caller: “Aren’t you the [Government Agency]?”

Me: “No, we’re not.” 

I go on to explain the differences between my organization and the government agency, and the call ends with her seeming to understand.

Five minutes later, she calls back, and we repeat the call.

Five minutes later, she calls back, seemingly more confused than ever. I explain that she can Google the government agency, and she’ll find all she needs to know about the [Officer Title], and that I can direct her to their office, if she’d like, for more information.

Caller: “You sound like you’re trying to be helpful, but I know you’re trying to brush me off! Just because I stutter doesn’t mean I’m an idiot! I know you’re the same organization! Why don’t you get off your high horse and help me?!”

Me: “Miss, I’m sorry you feel I am being patronizing. I am not. My organization may seem to be similar to [Government Agency], but—”

I go on to explain again.

Me: “I would very much like to help you, but the best way I can do that is to direct you towards the office and person you are seeking. Would you like that phone number?”

Caller: “NO! Ugh. You’re useless. I’ll call the corporate office.”

I haven’t had a call from them yet, but… yeah. Awesome!

I’m shopping in a discount store when a little boy about three years old runs past me screaming. He starts circling the racks of clothes shouting nonsense words while his mother, who is about three racks away, lazily calls for him to stop once or twice.

After a while, I am at the cash register, and as I am waiting for my credit card to go through, the cashier starts looking towards the door, which I can’t see because of the other cash register.

The cashier turns to two ladies by the door.

Cashier: “Excuse me, does he belong to you?”

The two ladies look and say no. Suddenly, the cashier takes off from behind the counter and out of the store. She comes back in holding the hand of the little boy who was running around earlier. 

Cashier: “Sweetie, you can’t go outside without your mommy or daddy. You could get hurt! Do you know where your mommy or daddy are?”

The child’s mother then comes walking casually along the aisle towards the door, as if nothing had happened. When the child sees her, he again starts screaming and tries to take off through the door. The mother takes his hand from the cashier and leads him out of the store without a word. The cashier comes back to the register.

Cashier: “I’m so sorry about that. Here’s your receipt.”

Me: “Are you kidding? You shouldn’t be apologizing to me; that mother should have been apologizing to you! Good for you.”