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We Wish This Author Understood Chinese!

, , , , , | Working | May 18, 2022

At our local Chinese restaurant, the food is good, but every time, something strange happens.

One time, we enter ten minutes after the doors opened. Lights are on but there is nobody, not even staff. We stand around for a few minutes and then start making polite noises until a man appears. He looks straight out of bed and drags a bottle.

He says a few things in Chinese, which we don’t understand. Then, he mumbles:

Man: “Closed. Closed. We closed.”

And he slowly disappears into the kitchen.

So we leave. Just outside the door, we meet the Chinese woman running the dining room, dragging bags and a stack of boxes, clearly too heavy for her. She asks why we’re leaving, so we tell her what happened.

She clearly understands us, as she drops everything on the floor and marches to the kitchen, her face an angry declaration of war.  

From the kitchen comes a loud discussion going back and forth, back and forth, in Chinese, between a very angry, fast-speaking woman voice and a sleepy, slow, male voice. Something breaks and the male voice stops abruptly.

The kitchen door swings open, and the woman strides out angry as a thunder cloud and then looks at us. Her face just switches to the most radiant, warm, welcoming smile you’ve ever seen, and she says with perfect, professional calm:

Woman: “Dinner will be served in ten minutes.”

If You Want Me To F*** Off, I Can Oblige

, , , , , , | Working | May 18, 2022

I was a kitchen manager at an upmarket restaurant in New Jersey. An employee told me to “f*** off” three times, so I sent him home.

The next day, the general manager brought the two of us together in a meeting.

General Manager: “I need you to apologize and shake [Employee]’s hand. He says he’s uncomfortable working around you.”

I had to apologize! Not the employee!

I gave notice, and my last day was February twelfth, right before Valentine’s Day! Good luck handling the holiday rush!

This Shouldn’t Be A Workplace Hazard

, , , , | Right | May 18, 2022

I see a sign inside a Tokyo restaurant:

Sign: “Do not touch our waitresses, ask for their contact information, or wait for them outside. This restaurant will not be responsible for any injuries happening to anyone who ignores this warning.”

Duly noted, yikes!

Drag Them Into The Modern Era Kicking And Screaming

, , , | Right | CREDIT: D**kSoAverage2001 | May 17, 2022

I’m serving in a restaurant while I’m in college. I always feel it’s rude to only give the man the check. It’s outdated, it’s sexist, and, a lot of times, I’ve seen the wife or girlfriend pay for the meal.

This older family comes in — kids in their late twenties and parents most likely in their sixties or seventies. They look a bit more like country folk, most of them wearing flannel. They are pretty quiet throughout their meal. They eat their meal, and I go get them their check.

When I deliver it, I put it directly in the middle of the table.

Me: “Here’s the check!”

The dad grabs it aggressively and makes an angry exhale noise.

Dad: “Do I look like a man that can’t feed his family?”

Me: “No, but you never know who has the wallet.”

Dad: “If I feed the family, why wouldn’t I have the wallet?”

This angers me because both my parents worked while I was growing up. They both were successful and didn’t need to rely on each other to get by.

Me: “I’m sorry.”

He shook his head and opened the check. His wife was acting totally on his side, also giving me angry body language.

Employees Do Their Jobs Best When You Don’t Let Them Die

, , , | Healthy Working | May 13, 2022

I work with a manager who has alienated everyone we work with because of a medical emergency I had. We got so slammed one morning that we were still trying to catch up at noon when my relief manager came in. My friend was working on breakfast dishes. I was trying to clean the egg grill when I got dizzy all of a sudden and passed out.

From what I was told, [Friend] saw me and ran right over, got on the ground, and held me up so he could check my pulse and make sure that I was breathing and that I wasn’t bleeding from the head. Someone alerted my manager, who had my cashier call 911 while he walked around aimlessly.

[Friend] started giving the cashier my medical history.

Manager: “[Cashier], get off the phone and get back to work!”

My friend took the phone from her so she could do that, and he took over giving dispatch information while still holding on to me. Thirty seconds later:

Manager: “[Friend], leave her and get back to work.”

Friend: “No way! I’m not leaving her until the paramedics get here”

Finally, I woke up and tried to sit up by myself, but [Friend] had one hand on my back in case I fell.

The paramedics came in and checked me over. They told [Friend] it was a good thing he had stayed with me; my heart rate was so high that I could have gone into cardiac arrest.

Manager: “Good thing I told you to stay with her, [Friend]!”

Everyone denied this. Later, [Friend] told our General Manager everything that happened.

Sadly, the idiot still has a job.