I overhear a tourist on the phone at a park that has lots of peacocks.

Tourist: “There’s blue disco chickens everywhere here, man…”

I see a dad putting his son, who looks to be about two or three, in a high chair at a restaurant. The kid isn’t having it and gives his dad an exasperated look.

Kid: “Am I a baby? Am. I. A. BABY?”

My dad and I are in a dollar store.

Dad: “I just heard the lady on the next aisle ask if something was a dollar.”

Me: “I’ve only read about those people on NotAlwaysRight. I didn’t think they existed in real life!”

It is Halloween and I am shopping in a seasonal aisle when I overhear two customers talking.

Customer: “The leap-day should fall in October, so every four years we get a Halloween Part II.”

I overhear this in the pet food aisle:

Small Child: *Pointing to a large bag of dog food* “Kitten food!”

Mother: “Yes, yes, we need to get kitten food.”

She puts a few bags of dog food into the cart.

Employee: “Sorry, ma’am, I just happened to overhear and wanted to make sure you know that’s dog food, not cat food.”

Mother: “Oh, no, I know… Hey, if you have kids, don’t let them name your pets, okay?”

This story is part of our Best Of December 2020 roundup!

Read the next Best Of December 2020 roundup story!

Read the Best Of December 2020 roundup!