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A Delightful Prom Alternative

, , , , | Romantic | April 28, 2022

High school prom is an event all unto itself. My friends and I were not big into the dance as we were all outcasts and didn’t see what the big deal was. We were talking about how we didn’t want to go to prom but we still wanted to do something, so our boyfriends told us to get dressed up and they would take us out. 

My two friends and I got dressed in our “prom” best and waited for the guys to pick us up. Our guys showed up in tuxedo T-shirts with jackets and top hats, looking amazing and silly at the same time. 

They took us to the [Fast Food Chain] one of them worked at. They had one part of the dining room blocked off. The employee’s dad greeted us, also wearing a tux shirt and top hat, and seated us at individual tables with white table cloths, candles, actual china, silver flatware, cloth napkins, and roses in tiny vases. 

We had our “fine dining” experience where we had our courses of burgers and fries brought out to us by the guy’s older brother — in a tux shirt and top hat — with sparkling grape juice being poured like fine wine from an ice wine bucket in the corner.

We had excellent service from the dad and brother who were the utmost professionals the entire time, though we were laughing, giggling, and just cracking up at how beyond sweet and ridiculous this all was.

The boy that thought of everything and somehow talked his family into this magical date night is now married to my friend with three amazing kids. 

He was telling his oldest son about how he came up with it all at BBQ last weekend, which makes me wonder if another girl is going to be swept off her feet?

At Least You’re Not A Leap-Day Baby

, , , , , | Working | April 13, 2022

I was trying to set up an appointment at a medical clinic upon recommendation from my doctor. Due to some issues with their website, I ended up needing to call in to set things up for the appointment.

Things were going fairly normally, until…

Me: “My birthday is [date].”

Receptionist #1: “I’m sorry, but that is not a valid date in our system. You will need to pick a different one.”

Me: *Somewhat off-balance* “Excuse me?”

Receptionist #1: “You can’t have [date] as your birthdate in our system. You will need a different one.”

I admit I was stunned silent for several seconds as I tried to process this.

Me: “I… That is my birthday. I can’t just have a different one. That’s… not how birthdays work.”

Receptionist #1: “The system won’t… One moment…”

There was some indistinct talking in the background.

Receptionist #2: “Hello, I’m sorry about that. This is [Receptionist #2]. It seems like there is an issue with our computer system. We just got a new system installed, and there have been a few bugs. Please hold while I try to work this out.”

I ended up on hold for a good twenty minutes, with [Receptionist #2] occasionally popping in again to say they were working on things. In the end, she was able to make me an appointment, with a manual note to add my birthdate once things were actually fixed.

I ended up mentioning the entire thing when I actually got to my appointment, and I was told by the doctor that, apparently, whoever had set up their system had decided to handle holidays by literally deleting them from some calendars in their system. This, of course, caused issues like what I experienced, given that my birthday did fall on the same day as a holiday in my birth year.

From what the doctor said, that wasn’t the worst issue that they’d experienced with the new system, but I was stuck on how the first receptionist I talked to didn’t seem to think there was anything odd about some dates not being selectable in the system or about asking someone to pick a new birthday.

Time Has No Meaning When You Work In Retail

, , , , , , | Working | March 30, 2022

I’m a personal shopper. One way I try to ward off the boredom is spotting significant dates on the expiry dates. Sad, I know, but what can you do? At the time, my birthday is less than a month away. Also, the shift started at 5:00 am, and it’s just gone 10:00 am.

Me: “Oooh, it’s my birthday!”

Coworker: “What, really?”

Me: “Yeah, the date on this yoghurt.”

Coworker: “Ohhhh. I thought this place had finally fully gotten to you and that you’d actually forgotten it was your birthday today or something.”

Please Reserve That Thought For Later

, , , | Right | CREDIT: A**hole_Catharsis | January 14, 2022

I am working in a restaurant and I answer the phone.

Caller #1: “Do you take reservations?”

Me: “No, we’re first-come, first-served.”

Caller #1: “Well, can you add our name to the list?”

Me: “I’ll be happy to add your name when you walk through the door. See you soon!” *Click*

Some people just don’t get it. I’ve worked at a few places that don’t do reservations, but regardless, if you’re a large party, it’s prudent to call ahead and give the restaurant a heads-up.

Nothing beats one experience, though.

Caller #2: “Hi. I saw on your website you don’t take reservations?”

Me: “Yeah, sorry. Unfortunately, we don’t.”

Caller #2: “Oh, really? It’s a wedding party!”

Me: “Oh, well, congrats! How large a party are we talking?”

Caller #2: “There’re twelve of us.”

Me: “Okay, we can try to accommodate you and map out tables to get you seated together. What time were you planning to come in?”

Caller #2: “5:30.”

It’s already 7:00 pm.

Me: “Ummm, wait. What day were you talking about?”

Caller #2: “Friday, July twelfth.”

It’s mid-February.

Me: “Yeah, okay, sorry, we don’t take reservations.”

Ugh. Some people.

Those Forms Need To Go To The Time Variance Authority

, , , , | Right | December 7, 2021

When people apply for disability benefits, there is a lot of documentation needed. My main job is handling the medical records aspect of it.

One day, I notice that the doctor who filled out a form didn’t say when the evaluation was done. This is a really necessary thing so the government can gauge the progression of the disability. I call the client.

Me: “Thanks for sending in the records from [Doctor]. I’m about to submit them to aid your case, but I don’t know the date of the evaluation.”

Client: “What day does it say?”

Me: “There is no date, but I received those on April 15.”

Client: “They’re from my appointment on May 23.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but since they arrived on April 15, they must have been from an appointment prior to April 15.”

Client: “Right! The doctor said he filled them out next week. I’ll send you the forms then.”

Me: “Sir, it is impossible for me to have received an evaluation last month for the appointment you have next week. When was the last time before April 15 that you saw [Doctor]?”

This goes on for five minutes and I am crying at my desk out of exasperation before…

Client: “Did you ever get the records from me seeing [Doctor] on March 8?”

Me: “When did you send them in?”

Client: “April 15.”